Fic: The Definition of a Soulmate
Title: The Definition of a Soulmate (According to Draco Lucius Malfoy)
Author: faeriechii
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Harry/Draco
Word Count: 2,167
Summary: Where Draco Malfoy defines what a soulmate is and makes an attempt to apply the definition to his.
Warnings: Crackish fluff. Don't ask?
Disclaimer: Harry Potter & Co. belong to JK Rowling. Writing is mine.
A/N: Written for hd_falling's Merry Month of May fest. This is May 19th's word prompt: soul mate. Many thanks to j_folked, my lovely beta, who gave me the idea for the end.
1. Soulmates always know that they belong together at first glance.
"Malfoy, what in Merlin's name are you staring at?" Harry Potter asked exasperatingly, his green eyes narrowed in suspicion. He could have sworn that the blond's icy grey eyes had been on him all morning.
"I have no idea what you mean, Potter," Draco said, stiffly. "I think you're the one who's been doing all the staring."
"Bollocks, Malfoy! You've been staring at me all morning, and you know it!"
"And how exactly would you know this had you not been staring at me in return?" Draco proclaimed triumphantly. "But never mind, Potter. I think I know why you were staring, so I completely forgive you."
"Because you started staring at me first?" Harry pointed out as he chopped potion ingredients.
"No," replied the blond as he half-preened and half-stirred the cauldron mixture. "It's obvious that you find my beauty completely irresistible. One can easily come to the conclusion that you couldn't stop staring because you think I'm pretty."
Harry's eye widened in panic, and he turned a brilliant shade of red.
"W-what? I-I never said that!" the dark-haired wizard said in protest. "I wasn't even staring at you!"
"Denial is unbecoming on you, Potter. I think you should just admit that you think I'm pretty so we can get our Potions assignment done."
"BUT I DO NOT THINK YOU'RE PRETTY!"
"Fifty points from Gryffindor!" Snape snarled, exceedingly displeased. "And honestly, if you can't keep your sickeningly sweet sentiments about Mr. Malfoy to yourself, Mr. Potter, you will no longer be welcome in my classroom."
Harry looked appalled but no one knew whether it was due to his embarrassing outburst or Professor Snape's sarcastic remark on said outburst.
"Honestly, Potter," Draco said, shaking his head. "I'm not sure what's wrong with you today. First, you won't admit that you think I'm pretty. Next, you'll deny that we belong together, I'm sure."
By this time, Harry Potter had turned quite pale and was staring incredulously at the nonchalant blond.
"W-WHAT?!"
"Detention, Mr. Potter!" Snape said in a menacing growl. "I will not accept distractions in my classroom."
But Harry hadn't heard him, having promptly fainted from shock.
2. Soulmates will always know what the other is thinking.
"How could you even think that?!" Draco said, sounding hurt. "It's almost as if you're trying to break my heart."
"But I didn't say anything!" Harry replied before pausing a moment. "Hang on, Draco Malfoy has a heart?"
The blond sniffled, tears threatening to fall from his expressive grey eyes.
"I don't understand why you're being so cruel today, Potter," Draco said, sighing agonisingly. Then, he suddenly perked up. "You're playing hard to get, aren't you? That's why you're saying all these things! You can't fool me; I can read your every thought."
Harry stared blankly at the blond, his green eyes blinking much the way an owl would in bright light, slow and deliberate.
"What are you blathering on about, Malfoy?" he said, when he could finally work up a response. "I am not playing hard to get, and I bet twenty galleons that you couldn't read my thoughts even if your life depended on it."
Draco looked affronted, his mouth gaping widely in disbelief.
"Take that back, Potter!"
"Take what back?"
"I can too read your mind, thank you very much," the blond said in a huff, his hands on his hips in defiance.
"Yeah?" Harry said in a challenging tone. "Prove it."
The blond beamed knowingly.
"You're thinking," Draco began with a dreamy expression on his face, "that you don't know how you could ever live without me."
"I don't know what you're on, Malfoy," Harry said dryly, "but that's definitely not what I was thinking."
"Playing hard to get again," the blond said, nodding to himself. "Guess what I'm thinking, Potter?"
"How should I know?" came the exasperated response. "I doubt even a Legilimens could know what you were thinking."
Draco pouted before stomping away.
3. Soulmates always have loving, meaningful conversations.
"Why must you be such a git to my friends, Malfoy?" Harry said wearily. "What have they ever done to you?"
"Plenty!" Draco said. "They talk to you, for one thing. For another, they're always hanging around you as if it was their birthright."
"They do have the right to be around me; they're my friends. It's what they do."
"Well, I don't like it," the blond huffed.
"Why should I care?"
"I think you'd be more of an expert to that question, Potter," Draco said, studying his nails in a bored fashion. "After all, you're the one who cares."
"I do not care!" Harry said, crossing his arms. "What gave you that crazy idea?"
"Try who," the blond corrected. "Who gave me that crazy idea? And actually, it was you. It's so obvious you care. You're radiating it."
"I am not!"
"Are too!"
"Am not!"
"Too!"
"Not!"
"Too!"
"Oh, this is ridiculous," Harry said, turning away to walk off. "I feel like I'm five again."
"So you admit that I win then, Potter?" Draco said smugly to the other wizard's back.
Harry stopped mid-track before turning slowly around to face Draco.
"No, Malfoy. You don't win because I don't care!"
"Actually you do," the blond replied smugly. "If you didn't, you wouldn't have turned around."
"Argh!" Harry shouted in frustration, storming away. "You're impossible!"
"No," Draco began helpfully with a smirk, "I'm incorrigible. And you like it."
The Boy Who Lived didn't answer but continued to walk away, muttering under his breath about a certain blond.
Draco beamed.
4. Soulmates will always share the perfect kiss.
Draco Malfoy had Harry Potter pushed up roughly against a wall. Both their cheeks were flushed, and their breaths were ragged and heavy. It was all Potter's fault, really, Draco mused to himself. If he had been more willing to accept that he was wrong, then they would never be in this predicament. Not that the blond didn't enjoy the position they were in, it was quite… pleasing really. He was defending truth at the moment, however, and that was far more important than his intimate desires.
"Just admit it, Potter."
"No, why should I admit something that isn't true?" Harry said in a biting tone, his eyes burning into the blond's.
"Because it is true, but it's not my fault if you aren't honourable enough to admit it," Draco said, smirking confidently.
"You only get better marks in Potions because Snape likes you. He plays favourites."
Draco snorted derisively.
"Obviously that shows how little you know about Professor Snape. Even if I were his favourite, he would never show any leniency toward me in marks," he said matter-of-factly. "Perhaps he likes me more because I actually learn how to concoct potions properly rather than waste the precious ingredients."
"He sets me up for failure!"
"You set yourself up for failure. I've seen how you handle everything. You're a complete and total disaster. Your chopping is shoddy and your measuring is only slightly more accurate than Longbottom's."
"Shut up, Malfoy!"
"Make me, Potter."
Harry struggled against Draco's grip on him but was unable to get out of it. After a moment of complete stillness, he glared at the blond defiantly and kissed him without a thought. Hard. It was an awkward kiss, naturally. After all, Harry hadn't kissed many people before, and Draco was too surprised and too horrified to reciprocate. It didn't help that the kiss was too sloppy, too wet, and too uncomfortable for Draco's taste.
The blond pulled away in a swift, smooth motion and spluttered distastefully.
"That was your elaborate plan on getting me to shut up? Please, Potter, you don't kiss spectacularly enough for it to work. First, your mouth was open far too wide," Draco instructed with annoyance. "Stop trying to devour my lips whole; they're not a Honeydukes confection. Save the suction for other parts of my body."
Harry blushed at the implication and was about to retort angrily at said implication but the blond had continued talking.
"Second, was that your tongue trying to find out what I had for breakfast this morning? Because if that was the case, I could've easily told you without you trying to make me gag. Less is more, Potter. Remember that. Burn it into your mind if you have to. It's imperative if you want this relationship to work."
"What relationship?" Harry asked exasperatedly. He was getting tired of having his rival pretend there was something between them when there was not. Mostly. Because he did not feel a giddy happiness being around Malfoy. He did not.
"Our relationship. You know, the one we've been in for the past few weeks?" Draco said, shaking his head. He had to wonder at the intelligence of his boyfriend sometimes. It was a wonder that he hadn't been sorted into Hufflepuff with his slowness lately.
"Wait. WHAT?"
Draco sighed and rolled his eyes.
"Oh shut up, and kiss me, Potter."
Strangely, Harry did, ignoring all rational thought.
5. Soulmates always live happily ever after.
Draco held Harry's hand is his own, swinging their entwined hands between them cheerfully. They were walking down the hallway of Hogwarts to get to the Great Hall for breakfast after several long hard weeks of taking their N.E.W.T.s, and both were feeling quite relaxed. Of course, Draco was beaming victoriously, knowing all along that Harry had been madly in love with him and was only just in denial of the whole thing.
"Isn't this wonderful, Harry?" Draco said cheerfully. "I knew you would come around. You just had to stop trying to fool yourself. But it was always our destiny to be together, and I'm glad you finally saw it!"
Harry sighed softly but merely nodded in agreement. In truth, he hadn't seen it, and he thought that the Slytherin would have been mental had he not been right.
"I'm just relieved that our exams are over with. I'm completely knackered, don't think I've ever lost that much sleep."
"Well, why do you think they call it the N.E.W.T.s? Honestly! I'm surprised you didn't rely on something to keep you awake. I was sure you'd fall asleep during the Charms exam. I had coffee brewing the entire time down in the dungeons. Amazingly blessed stuff, it is."
They turned down a corridor and ended up at the entrance of the Great Hall. Instantly, Draco led the both of them toward the Slytherin table, but Harry stopped mid-step, forcing the blond to stop as well.
"I thought we were going to go sit with my friends," Harry said, slightly confused.
Draco's eyes grew alarmingly wide before giving the dark-haired wizard a look of disbelief.
"Me? Sit with the Gryffindors?" he said pouting, obviously appalled at the idea. "And here I thought you loved me."
"I do, but it's obvious that none of your friends like me, yeah? So I thought we'd sit with mine."
"Oh, because yours completely adore me."
"Well, no," Harry admitted. "But at least they'd be civil."
"Slytherins can be civil!" Draco protested adamantly.
Harry gave him a look.
"Fine, we'll sit with your friends," the blond said as if he were doing his boyfriend a great favour. "Just for today."
Harry beamed and taking Draco's hand, led them over to the Gryffindor table. Harry's friends greeted him ecstatically but greeted the blond with a bit more stiff politeness. There was a hesitant pause before everyone resumed their own conversations.
Harry sat down and promptly began to help himself to toast when he noticed that Draco hadn't moved to sit.
"Draco, what's wrong? Why aren't you sitting down?"
Draco sniffed pompously as if he was just asked to kiss a hippogriff.
"I'm not… I'm not sitting on that," he said narrowing his eyes suspiciously on the bench. "It's been sat on by Gryffindors, who knows what kind of contaminations it could have."
Harry sighed with exasperation and rolled his eyes.
"Then where will you sit?"
Draco had the look of innocence radiating from his face, and Harry knew he was in trouble.
Five minutes later, Draco was seated comfortably in Harry's lap, much to the latter boy's embarrassment. It probably would have been more pleasant had the blond not been whinging about every single trivial matter. The dark-haired wizard was beginning to develop a migraine, very much similar to the ones he'd get after a nightmare related to the Dark Lord. But somehow he wasn't surprised. Being with a Slytherin, any Slytherin, was dangerous.
"And their manners," Draco was saying. "Simply atrocious! Why, did you see how they ignored me right after-"
"Alright! Alright! Tomorrow we'll sit at the Slytherin table."
Draco smiled a rapturous smile at Harry, who melted at the sight, and was a perfect angel for the rest of breakfast. Compromise was for Gryffindors, and he was everything but. Besides, how else was he going to get his happy ending without a bit of sheer cunning?
Author: faeriechii
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Harry/Draco
Word Count: 2,167
Summary: Where Draco Malfoy defines what a soulmate is and makes an attempt to apply the definition to his.
Warnings: Crackish fluff. Don't ask?
Disclaimer: Harry Potter & Co. belong to JK Rowling. Writing is mine.
A/N: Written for hd_falling's Merry Month of May fest. This is May 19th's word prompt: soul mate. Many thanks to j_folked, my lovely beta, who gave me the idea for the end.
1. Soulmates always know that they belong together at first glance.
"Malfoy, what in Merlin's name are you staring at?" Harry Potter asked exasperatingly, his green eyes narrowed in suspicion. He could have sworn that the blond's icy grey eyes had been on him all morning.
"I have no idea what you mean, Potter," Draco said, stiffly. "I think you're the one who's been doing all the staring."
"Bollocks, Malfoy! You've been staring at me all morning, and you know it!"
"And how exactly would you know this had you not been staring at me in return?" Draco proclaimed triumphantly. "But never mind, Potter. I think I know why you were staring, so I completely forgive you."
"Because you started staring at me first?" Harry pointed out as he chopped potion ingredients.
"No," replied the blond as he half-preened and half-stirred the cauldron mixture. "It's obvious that you find my beauty completely irresistible. One can easily come to the conclusion that you couldn't stop staring because you think I'm pretty."
Harry's eye widened in panic, and he turned a brilliant shade of red.
"W-what? I-I never said that!" the dark-haired wizard said in protest. "I wasn't even staring at you!"
"Denial is unbecoming on you, Potter. I think you should just admit that you think I'm pretty so we can get our Potions assignment done."
"BUT I DO NOT THINK YOU'RE PRETTY!"
"Fifty points from Gryffindor!" Snape snarled, exceedingly displeased. "And honestly, if you can't keep your sickeningly sweet sentiments about Mr. Malfoy to yourself, Mr. Potter, you will no longer be welcome in my classroom."
Harry looked appalled but no one knew whether it was due to his embarrassing outburst or Professor Snape's sarcastic remark on said outburst.
"Honestly, Potter," Draco said, shaking his head. "I'm not sure what's wrong with you today. First, you won't admit that you think I'm pretty. Next, you'll deny that we belong together, I'm sure."
By this time, Harry Potter had turned quite pale and was staring incredulously at the nonchalant blond.
"W-WHAT?!"
"Detention, Mr. Potter!" Snape said in a menacing growl. "I will not accept distractions in my classroom."
But Harry hadn't heard him, having promptly fainted from shock.
2. Soulmates will always know what the other is thinking.
"How could you even think that?!" Draco said, sounding hurt. "It's almost as if you're trying to break my heart."
"But I didn't say anything!" Harry replied before pausing a moment. "Hang on, Draco Malfoy has a heart?"
The blond sniffled, tears threatening to fall from his expressive grey eyes.
"I don't understand why you're being so cruel today, Potter," Draco said, sighing agonisingly. Then, he suddenly perked up. "You're playing hard to get, aren't you? That's why you're saying all these things! You can't fool me; I can read your every thought."
Harry stared blankly at the blond, his green eyes blinking much the way an owl would in bright light, slow and deliberate.
"What are you blathering on about, Malfoy?" he said, when he could finally work up a response. "I am not playing hard to get, and I bet twenty galleons that you couldn't read my thoughts even if your life depended on it."
Draco looked affronted, his mouth gaping widely in disbelief.
"Take that back, Potter!"
"Take what back?"
"I can too read your mind, thank you very much," the blond said in a huff, his hands on his hips in defiance.
"Yeah?" Harry said in a challenging tone. "Prove it."
The blond beamed knowingly.
"You're thinking," Draco began with a dreamy expression on his face, "that you don't know how you could ever live without me."
"I don't know what you're on, Malfoy," Harry said dryly, "but that's definitely not what I was thinking."
"Playing hard to get again," the blond said, nodding to himself. "Guess what I'm thinking, Potter?"
"How should I know?" came the exasperated response. "I doubt even a Legilimens could know what you were thinking."
Draco pouted before stomping away.
3. Soulmates always have loving, meaningful conversations.
"Why must you be such a git to my friends, Malfoy?" Harry said wearily. "What have they ever done to you?"
"Plenty!" Draco said. "They talk to you, for one thing. For another, they're always hanging around you as if it was their birthright."
"They do have the right to be around me; they're my friends. It's what they do."
"Well, I don't like it," the blond huffed.
"Why should I care?"
"I think you'd be more of an expert to that question, Potter," Draco said, studying his nails in a bored fashion. "After all, you're the one who cares."
"I do not care!" Harry said, crossing his arms. "What gave you that crazy idea?"
"Try who," the blond corrected. "Who gave me that crazy idea? And actually, it was you. It's so obvious you care. You're radiating it."
"I am not!"
"Are too!"
"Am not!"
"Too!"
"Not!"
"Too!"
"Oh, this is ridiculous," Harry said, turning away to walk off. "I feel like I'm five again."
"So you admit that I win then, Potter?" Draco said smugly to the other wizard's back.
Harry stopped mid-track before turning slowly around to face Draco.
"No, Malfoy. You don't win because I don't care!"
"Actually you do," the blond replied smugly. "If you didn't, you wouldn't have turned around."
"Argh!" Harry shouted in frustration, storming away. "You're impossible!"
"No," Draco began helpfully with a smirk, "I'm incorrigible. And you like it."
The Boy Who Lived didn't answer but continued to walk away, muttering under his breath about a certain blond.
Draco beamed.
4. Soulmates will always share the perfect kiss.
Draco Malfoy had Harry Potter pushed up roughly against a wall. Both their cheeks were flushed, and their breaths were ragged and heavy. It was all Potter's fault, really, Draco mused to himself. If he had been more willing to accept that he was wrong, then they would never be in this predicament. Not that the blond didn't enjoy the position they were in, it was quite… pleasing really. He was defending truth at the moment, however, and that was far more important than his intimate desires.
"Just admit it, Potter."
"No, why should I admit something that isn't true?" Harry said in a biting tone, his eyes burning into the blond's.
"Because it is true, but it's not my fault if you aren't honourable enough to admit it," Draco said, smirking confidently.
"You only get better marks in Potions because Snape likes you. He plays favourites."
Draco snorted derisively.
"Obviously that shows how little you know about Professor Snape. Even if I were his favourite, he would never show any leniency toward me in marks," he said matter-of-factly. "Perhaps he likes me more because I actually learn how to concoct potions properly rather than waste the precious ingredients."
"He sets me up for failure!"
"You set yourself up for failure. I've seen how you handle everything. You're a complete and total disaster. Your chopping is shoddy and your measuring is only slightly more accurate than Longbottom's."
"Shut up, Malfoy!"
"Make me, Potter."
Harry struggled against Draco's grip on him but was unable to get out of it. After a moment of complete stillness, he glared at the blond defiantly and kissed him without a thought. Hard. It was an awkward kiss, naturally. After all, Harry hadn't kissed many people before, and Draco was too surprised and too horrified to reciprocate. It didn't help that the kiss was too sloppy, too wet, and too uncomfortable for Draco's taste.
The blond pulled away in a swift, smooth motion and spluttered distastefully.
"That was your elaborate plan on getting me to shut up? Please, Potter, you don't kiss spectacularly enough for it to work. First, your mouth was open far too wide," Draco instructed with annoyance. "Stop trying to devour my lips whole; they're not a Honeydukes confection. Save the suction for other parts of my body."
Harry blushed at the implication and was about to retort angrily at said implication but the blond had continued talking.
"Second, was that your tongue trying to find out what I had for breakfast this morning? Because if that was the case, I could've easily told you without you trying to make me gag. Less is more, Potter. Remember that. Burn it into your mind if you have to. It's imperative if you want this relationship to work."
"What relationship?" Harry asked exasperatedly. He was getting tired of having his rival pretend there was something between them when there was not. Mostly. Because he did not feel a giddy happiness being around Malfoy. He did not.
"Our relationship. You know, the one we've been in for the past few weeks?" Draco said, shaking his head. He had to wonder at the intelligence of his boyfriend sometimes. It was a wonder that he hadn't been sorted into Hufflepuff with his slowness lately.
"Wait. WHAT?"
Draco sighed and rolled his eyes.
"Oh shut up, and kiss me, Potter."
Strangely, Harry did, ignoring all rational thought.
5. Soulmates always live happily ever after.
Draco held Harry's hand is his own, swinging their entwined hands between them cheerfully. They were walking down the hallway of Hogwarts to get to the Great Hall for breakfast after several long hard weeks of taking their N.E.W.T.s, and both were feeling quite relaxed. Of course, Draco was beaming victoriously, knowing all along that Harry had been madly in love with him and was only just in denial of the whole thing.
"Isn't this wonderful, Harry?" Draco said cheerfully. "I knew you would come around. You just had to stop trying to fool yourself. But it was always our destiny to be together, and I'm glad you finally saw it!"
Harry sighed softly but merely nodded in agreement. In truth, he hadn't seen it, and he thought that the Slytherin would have been mental had he not been right.
"I'm just relieved that our exams are over with. I'm completely knackered, don't think I've ever lost that much sleep."
"Well, why do you think they call it the N.E.W.T.s? Honestly! I'm surprised you didn't rely on something to keep you awake. I was sure you'd fall asleep during the Charms exam. I had coffee brewing the entire time down in the dungeons. Amazingly blessed stuff, it is."
They turned down a corridor and ended up at the entrance of the Great Hall. Instantly, Draco led the both of them toward the Slytherin table, but Harry stopped mid-step, forcing the blond to stop as well.
"I thought we were going to go sit with my friends," Harry said, slightly confused.
Draco's eyes grew alarmingly wide before giving the dark-haired wizard a look of disbelief.
"Me? Sit with the Gryffindors?" he said pouting, obviously appalled at the idea. "And here I thought you loved me."
"I do, but it's obvious that none of your friends like me, yeah? So I thought we'd sit with mine."
"Oh, because yours completely adore me."
"Well, no," Harry admitted. "But at least they'd be civil."
"Slytherins can be civil!" Draco protested adamantly.
Harry gave him a look.
"Fine, we'll sit with your friends," the blond said as if he were doing his boyfriend a great favour. "Just for today."
Harry beamed and taking Draco's hand, led them over to the Gryffindor table. Harry's friends greeted him ecstatically but greeted the blond with a bit more stiff politeness. There was a hesitant pause before everyone resumed their own conversations.
Harry sat down and promptly began to help himself to toast when he noticed that Draco hadn't moved to sit.
"Draco, what's wrong? Why aren't you sitting down?"
Draco sniffed pompously as if he was just asked to kiss a hippogriff.
"I'm not… I'm not sitting on that," he said narrowing his eyes suspiciously on the bench. "It's been sat on by Gryffindors, who knows what kind of contaminations it could have."
Harry sighed with exasperation and rolled his eyes.
"Then where will you sit?"
Draco had the look of innocence radiating from his face, and Harry knew he was in trouble.
Five minutes later, Draco was seated comfortably in Harry's lap, much to the latter boy's embarrassment. It probably would have been more pleasant had the blond not been whinging about every single trivial matter. The dark-haired wizard was beginning to develop a migraine, very much similar to the ones he'd get after a nightmare related to the Dark Lord. But somehow he wasn't surprised. Being with a Slytherin, any Slytherin, was dangerous.
"And their manners," Draco was saying. "Simply atrocious! Why, did you see how they ignored me right after-"
"Alright! Alright! Tomorrow we'll sit at the Slytherin table."
Draco smiled a rapturous smile at Harry, who melted at the sight, and was a perfect angel for the rest of breakfast. Compromise was for Gryffindors, and he was everything but. Besides, how else was he going to get his happy ending without a bit of sheer cunning?