i remember................

[fadedstar916]

i remember the way he'd never let me pay for anything. and the complete shock i felt the one and only time he did. i remember how he got me into country music. going to meijer with sean and tat and him holding my hair back when i got sick in the bathroom. the way you seriously had to punch him as hard as you could to wake him up. the way we'd just lay in bed watching movies all night. how he would wash my hair whenever we showered together. or he's start one for me and made sure the water was just right when i wanted to shower alone. the way he stared at me. how the first time i met him he took me to dunkin donuts at like midnight. and the second time i met his grandmother. the way he kissed me and how i wanted to melt in his arms.the way he'd always play with my hair when we were laying in bed and sometimes he'd try to do it without me knowing. the way he smelled. the way he would smell me. the night him sean tat and lou got drunk and i had to drive them to rams horn and 3 in the morning. driving around up north. riding the 3 wheeler and then having to ditch it and walk a mile back to camp with him. riding home in the back of his car using his shirt as a pillow cuz neither one of us got any sleep the night before. sitting on the bench in front of a fire at chris and bonnies with him behind me with his arms around me. the way all his friends would call me trouble. the feeling i would get when i looked at him and knew he was mine. how when i got sick he'd do anything he could to make me comfortable. the way it felt when he touched me. the way him sean and tat would act when they got together. how jealous he'd get of kyle. seeing him for the first time in months at justins and how we sat there together like nothing bad had ever happened. and he bummed me smokes while we watched tv. then i ended up going home with him and staying the night and didnt leave for days. when he kissed me again and it felt just like the first time all over again and nothing had changed at all. the cute pink cell phone he gave me. the way he'd let me drive his car while he was at work. wearing his white long sleeve shirt with the black flames one the sleeves to school all the time. the stupid video camera incident and how mad i got at him. the time i got caught out with ihm at 4 in the morning when i was supposed to be at home. how he'd pick me up at the corner ever night i was allowed to go out but did anyway. and how he'd drop me off at the corner and sit there and wait for me to go in before he drove away. the way i felt when his arms were around me. the night he stayed at my house and was late for work the next day cuz i couldnt for the life of me get him to wake up and stay up. walking home in the rain when we got into a fight. the pictue he took when we made up. the things he said and the way i felt when we made up. the way he never rushed me for sex. that stupid truck he got.how everytime i saw him after we broke up my heart jumped into my throat and i got butterflies. and he would always stare at me just like he used to. like he sill felt everything that was once upon a time. i will always remember seeing him friday. how my heart jumped and the way he smiled and stared the whole time we passed each other. how happy he looked and how i felt when he stared. how i wanted more then anything to stop and say hi but didnt. and how 3 hours later he was gone and i will never be able to get that chance.

R.I.P JESSE. YOU HAVE ABSOULTELY NO IDEA HOW MUCH YOU WILL BE MISSED OR HOW MUCH I REALLY CARED.

i cant belive he is gone.