[btvs] the ache of loneliness
Title: Ache of Loneliness
Author: aaronlisa
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairing/Characters: Buffy Summers
Rating: FR13
Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer belongs to Joss Whedon and company.
Prompts: n/a
Notes: Set post Season Seven.
Summary: There are those that she lost because they couldn’t understand who and what she was.
Word Count: 398
The starlight seems brighter out in the middle of nowhere than they ever did in her backyard in Sunnydale. Buffy sighs as she stares up at the night sky and she remembers everyone that she’s lost since she first became a Slayer. Not everyone on her list is dead and buried, or a walking abomination. There are those that she lost because they couldn’t understand who and what she was. Those friends who refused to accept the fact that she was blessed with a destiny that involved her slaying vampires.
She still aches over the loss of her father, not to the darkness but to an unwillingness to stand by his daughter when she needed him most. He’s out there somewhere, alive and well, remarried and with another child or two. Buffy can’t help but wonder if he ever things about her and his first wife and if he ever had a memory of Dawn. He must have because even after her mother had passed away, his monthly support cheques came with his daughters names on the memorandums. She remembers that she’d stuff them in the drawer of her mother’s desk, unable to check them because he had never changed who the cheques were addressed to despite Buffy having sent him several letters about Joyce’s death, including one with her obituary.
It’s not as if she’s completely alone, even now, after she’s managed to defeat the First and destroy the Hellmouth in Sunnydale. Willow, Xander and Giles are still by her side, valiantly fighting her war but it sometimes stings that the ones that stuck by her aren’t her family by blood or even the friends that she had back in LA, the friends that she had made when she was barely old enough to spell her full name. Willow, Xander and Giles have become her family in ways that transcend blood but sometimes it hurts that she has no one that she can share certain memories with. There’s Dawn but her younger sister is going through yet another stage in her life, which makes Buffy long for their mother even more while she wonders if she was this bad at the same age.
As she stares up at the night sky one more time, Buffy wonders if the ache of loneliness will ever dissipate or if it’s something that all Slayers carry with them throughout the ages.
**END**
Author: aaronlisa
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairing/Characters: Buffy Summers
Rating: FR13
Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer belongs to Joss Whedon and company.
Prompts: n/a
Notes: Set post Season Seven.
Summary: There are those that she lost because they couldn’t understand who and what she was.
Word Count: 398
The starlight seems brighter out in the middle of nowhere than they ever did in her backyard in Sunnydale. Buffy sighs as she stares up at the night sky and she remembers everyone that she’s lost since she first became a Slayer. Not everyone on her list is dead and buried, or a walking abomination. There are those that she lost because they couldn’t understand who and what she was. Those friends who refused to accept the fact that she was blessed with a destiny that involved her slaying vampires.
She still aches over the loss of her father, not to the darkness but to an unwillingness to stand by his daughter when she needed him most. He’s out there somewhere, alive and well, remarried and with another child or two. Buffy can’t help but wonder if he ever things about her and his first wife and if he ever had a memory of Dawn. He must have because even after her mother had passed away, his monthly support cheques came with his daughters names on the memorandums. She remembers that she’d stuff them in the drawer of her mother’s desk, unable to check them because he had never changed who the cheques were addressed to despite Buffy having sent him several letters about Joyce’s death, including one with her obituary.
It’s not as if she’s completely alone, even now, after she’s managed to defeat the First and destroy the Hellmouth in Sunnydale. Willow, Xander and Giles are still by her side, valiantly fighting her war but it sometimes stings that the ones that stuck by her aren’t her family by blood or even the friends that she had back in LA, the friends that she had made when she was barely old enough to spell her full name. Willow, Xander and Giles have become her family in ways that transcend blood but sometimes it hurts that she has no one that she can share certain memories with. There’s Dawn but her younger sister is going through yet another stage in her life, which makes Buffy long for their mother even more while she wonders if she was this bad at the same age.
As she stares up at the night sky one more time, Buffy wonders if the ache of loneliness will ever dissipate or if it’s something that all Slayers carry with them throughout the ages.
**END**