Fic: Back Around
Title: Back Around
Author: FacetedMind
Rating: T
Spoilers: Through to Season Four Episode 15 YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
Tag: Maybe Ol' Yellow Eyes was right. Maybe Sammy didn't come back right. Maybe no one did.
From reading Yacoba's Down the Only Road He'll Ever Know and debating John Winchester's change from the kind loving man we saw in 4.15 to the man who drove his children to the extremes of what a person can handle. There has to have been something else. I can't believe Mary's death was all there was to it.
Excerpt from the journal of John Winchester, no date or reference provided:
For a soul violently extracted, reunion with the body through any means leads to adverse effects in later life. The soul returns confused, turned about, with values changed from the original state. Insomnia is often rife, and randomly targeted violence common. Vengeful action - such as might be seen in spirits after death - are to be expected. Provided the targets are appropriate this should be encouraged over more arbitrary acts of violence. Vengeance is often controlled by an unobtainable goal and as such can be guided and focused.
When John Winchester came back, it was to a world he didn't recognise any more. He loved his wife, and that burned so brightly in him that he couldn't think of much else. He hated her father, who had scared her into turning his blade on him, who had killed her mother so inexplicably. But he was dead, and all John could do was take Mary away and marry her.
When Dean Winchester came back, it was to the bright white of hospital walls and the choking tube in his throat. He felt like he'd been emptied out, hollowed of all emotion, and all that space filled with demon smoke. His stomach churned and he tried to smile for Sammy, for their Dad. He was alive, and his hatred for the thing that made Sammy look at him like that… like he was frail… burned bright.
When Sam Winchester came back, it was to a world filled with demons and his brother and him the only light in that dark. And then his brother's light went out and he found out that his own was only a pale reflection. He walked into the dark with arms wide open, because that way lay the vengeance Ruby had so readily offered. Vengeance and death.
When Dean Winchester came back the second time, it was to a world filled with light and angels, and his soul anchored to his body by the hand-shaped seal on his shoulder. And in all that, all he could see was the darkness within himself. The hole in the pit of his stomach that threatened to pull all that light and goodness in. He sees Castiel start to darken, his light fade, and he thinks maybe God could have saved the world a whole lot of trouble if he'd just let John Winchester die.
Author: FacetedMind
Rating: T
Spoilers: Through to Season Four Episode 15 YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
Tag: Maybe Ol' Yellow Eyes was right. Maybe Sammy didn't come back right. Maybe no one did.
From reading Yacoba's Down the Only Road He'll Ever Know and debating John Winchester's change from the kind loving man we saw in 4.15 to the man who drove his children to the extremes of what a person can handle. There has to have been something else. I can't believe Mary's death was all there was to it.
Excerpt from the journal of John Winchester, no date or reference provided:
For a soul violently extracted, reunion with the body through any means leads to adverse effects in later life. The soul returns confused, turned about, with values changed from the original state. Insomnia is often rife, and randomly targeted violence common. Vengeful action - such as might be seen in spirits after death - are to be expected. Provided the targets are appropriate this should be encouraged over more arbitrary acts of violence. Vengeance is often controlled by an unobtainable goal and as such can be guided and focused.
When John Winchester came back, it was to a world he didn't recognise any more. He loved his wife, and that burned so brightly in him that he couldn't think of much else. He hated her father, who had scared her into turning his blade on him, who had killed her mother so inexplicably. But he was dead, and all John could do was take Mary away and marry her.
When Dean Winchester came back, it was to the bright white of hospital walls and the choking tube in his throat. He felt like he'd been emptied out, hollowed of all emotion, and all that space filled with demon smoke. His stomach churned and he tried to smile for Sammy, for their Dad. He was alive, and his hatred for the thing that made Sammy look at him like that… like he was frail… burned bright.
When Sam Winchester came back, it was to a world filled with demons and his brother and him the only light in that dark. And then his brother's light went out and he found out that his own was only a pale reflection. He walked into the dark with arms wide open, because that way lay the vengeance Ruby had so readily offered. Vengeance and death.
When Dean Winchester came back the second time, it was to a world filled with light and angels, and his soul anchored to his body by the hand-shaped seal on his shoulder. And in all that, all he could see was the darkness within himself. The hole in the pit of his stomach that threatened to pull all that light and goodness in. He sees Castiel start to darken, his light fade, and he thinks maybe God could have saved the world a whole lot of trouble if he'd just let John Winchester die.