Eleven -- voice
[ It's clear enough when he speaks that it's mostly to himself - perhaps to someone else in the room, but-- ]
I suppose I should count myself lucky, to have been relatively unscathed as of late. But when I do, something worse always rears to slap me in the face - perhaps it's best after all that I don't say anything either way.
I was affected by that blood curse, though. It made getting things without soiling them a trial, so I ended up just using my wand all day... I'm sorry I got blood on you, yeah? It's a beast to get out of feathers.
[ Quieter, even - more to himself than ever. ]
Sometimes I wonder if I shouldn't have done things differently. Would I have had more blood on my hands? Less?
Would I have a heartbeat?
It's not so simple to gauge, good and evil.
[ HASTILY MADE PRIVATE AFTER POST WAS ALREADY MADE - CURSED - WARDED ]
I'm dead. No heartbeat, no need for breath. I don't need to eat and my skin is cold.
I shouldn't be here. It's unnatural. In physicality I am little more than what killed me - though I lack the rot. I retain my mind, I retain my ability.
I can't age - I should already be older, but I'm not.
I can't help but think about Claire. I fancy her, that much is clear enough - but how can anything progress like this? She's alive - she'll grow up, get older, and I'll stay the same.
She can leave this place and I cannot - even if I could, we would never return to the same place.
What's left?
Can I regain my life's breath?
Would the cost be worth it or would I be left crippled in some other way?
I wonder if it wouldn't be easier if I had simply rotted in the lake I died in - but then I think harder and wonder if it's not so hard after all; to live an afterlife with a second chance.
It's best to take things as they come, now.
I'm grateful for her, for this, and that much is enough.
[ END PRIVATE ]
... Come on, Noah. Let's get you some treats.
[ A series of noises that means he's giving the owl a couple treats. Regulus does notice, belatedly, the recording. ]
... Bugger. I think a silencing charm is in order. ... A curse, yeah?
[ Click. ]
[ooc: There was a span of, say, two minutes where the entire post was public. After that the private section is CURSED and will give you a nasty shock if you try and hack it. Sorry. ♥
PLEASE use discretion when saying if you were able to see it before he locked it or not. I don't want everyone in the city having seen it, ffff. Ilu bbs.]
I suppose I should count myself lucky, to have been relatively unscathed as of late. But when I do, something worse always rears to slap me in the face - perhaps it's best after all that I don't say anything either way.
I was affected by that blood curse, though. It made getting things without soiling them a trial, so I ended up just using my wand all day... I'm sorry I got blood on you, yeah? It's a beast to get out of feathers.
[ Quieter, even - more to himself than ever. ]
Sometimes I wonder if I shouldn't have done things differently. Would I have had more blood on my hands? Less?
Would I have a heartbeat?
It's not so simple to gauge, good and evil.
[ HASTILY MADE PRIVATE AFTER POST WAS ALREADY MADE - CURSED - WARDED ]
I'm dead. No heartbeat, no need for breath. I don't need to eat and my skin is cold.
I shouldn't be here. It's unnatural. In physicality I am little more than what killed me - though I lack the rot. I retain my mind, I retain my ability.
I can't age - I should already be older, but I'm not.
I can't help but think about Claire. I fancy her, that much is clear enough - but how can anything progress like this? She's alive - she'll grow up, get older, and I'll stay the same.
She can leave this place and I cannot - even if I could, we would never return to the same place.
What's left?
Can I regain my life's breath?
Would the cost be worth it or would I be left crippled in some other way?
I wonder if it wouldn't be easier if I had simply rotted in the lake I died in - but then I think harder and wonder if it's not so hard after all; to live an afterlife with a second chance.
It's best to take things as they come, now.
I'm grateful for her, for this, and that much is enough.
[ END PRIVATE ]
... Come on, Noah. Let's get you some treats.
[ A series of noises that means he's giving the owl a couple treats. Regulus does notice, belatedly, the recording. ]
... Bugger. I think a silencing charm is in order. ... A curse, yeah?
[ Click. ]
[ooc: There was a span of, say, two minutes where the entire post was public. After that the private section is CURSED and will give you a nasty shock if you try and hack it. Sorry. ♥
PLEASE use discretion when saying if you were able to see it before he locked it or not. I don't want everyone in the city having seen it, ffff. Ilu bbs.]