The quest to sort one's fucking life out continues.
Drugs:
Underestimated the side effects of cold-turkey sertraline somewhat; Thursday felt like my brain was being pulled out through my eyes... much better now though, only a choir of tinnitus remains...
Tech Wankery:
Had a geeky creative couple of days: tutoring Bee's Dad on PSP modding Bee's Wii to do lots of cool stuff (that Nintendo should've really included in the first place), fixing the guitar hero world tour drum kit (for the nth time) and fashioning a system to play music from my phone through my amp via bluetooth from hacking apart an old headset. Quality was horrible though and only mono, and I really need to invest in a decent soldering pen especially if I am to follow through my plans of Wiimote geekery >:)
Oh I need to make videos of my last 2 projects: The real-life guitar hero drumkit and The homemade racing game clutch + force feedback gearstickery so watch this space kids, you'll be impressed even if at this point you don't give a flying toss.
Social stuff:
One thing that's bugged me since the start of uni is my lack of close friends in Falmouth, and the abundance of superficial lacklustre friendships that I could really take or leave.
If I had to put my finger on one thing that was responsible for exacerbating my depression over the last couple of years I would land my grubby mitts firmly on the 'friendship' category... Because no-one here really compares to any of the old Barnstaple crew, but I didn't realise that at the time, woods and trees obfuscating each other and so forth.
All my head knew was: "I used to have lots of friends, now I don't have any. Wow I must be a total cunt." And this annoys me because I blamed myself for something that I couldn't control.
Anyway, since Bee came on the scene I've slowly started to realise that it's not me, I just don't like my 'friends' here as much as I thought I did, and feeling is obviously mutual but in the process of this convoluted self-deception worthier friends have been neglected.
Now is the time to, as they say, sort it AHHHHT.
Love you all, sweet dreams x
Underestimated the side effects of cold-turkey sertraline somewhat; Thursday felt like my brain was being pulled out through my eyes... much better now though, only a choir of tinnitus remains...
Tech Wankery:
Had a geeky creative couple of days: tutoring Bee's Dad on PSP modding Bee's Wii to do lots of cool stuff (that Nintendo should've really included in the first place), fixing the guitar hero world tour drum kit (for the nth time) and fashioning a system to play music from my phone through my amp via bluetooth from hacking apart an old headset. Quality was horrible though and only mono, and I really need to invest in a decent soldering pen especially if I am to follow through my plans of Wiimote geekery >:)
Oh I need to make videos of my last 2 projects: The real-life guitar hero drumkit and The homemade racing game clutch + force feedback gearstickery so watch this space kids, you'll be impressed even if at this point you don't give a flying toss.
Social stuff:
One thing that's bugged me since the start of uni is my lack of close friends in Falmouth, and the abundance of superficial lacklustre friendships that I could really take or leave.
If I had to put my finger on one thing that was responsible for exacerbating my depression over the last couple of years I would land my grubby mitts firmly on the 'friendship' category... Because no-one here really compares to any of the old Barnstaple crew, but I didn't realise that at the time, woods and trees obfuscating each other and so forth.
All my head knew was: "I used to have lots of friends, now I don't have any. Wow I must be a total cunt." And this annoys me because I blamed myself for something that I couldn't control.
Anyway, since Bee came on the scene I've slowly started to realise that it's not me, I just don't like my 'friends' here as much as I thought I did, and feeling is obviously mutual but in the process of this convoluted self-deception worthier friends have been neglected.
Now is the time to, as they say, sort it AHHHHT.
Love you all, sweet dreams x