the great harry potter re-read: harry potter and the chamber of secrets chapters 7-12

[fabula_vitae]

HEY HEY TIME FOR SOME MORE CHAMBER OF SECRETS.


Chapter Seven: Mudbloods and Murmurs

• So stalker!Colin totally reminds me of this kid who was two grades below me who had an unending crush on me through junior high BECAUSE HE WOULD FOLLOW ME AROUND SAYING HI TO ME JUST LIKE COLIN DOES IN THIS BOOK. (He even came up to my classroom when I was in sixth grade to give me a Spongebob Squarepants valentine. Which also relates to the valentine that Harry gets from Ginny in a few chapters.) /random personal anecdotes
• SERIOUSLY COLIN CAN YOU JUST LEAVE HARRY ALONE FOR ONE SECOND D:< (Can you tell that I've had experiences of people who have been obsessed with me for no reason, mainly in the form of boys with crushes on me? Most notably the early winter of my senior year of high school which I'm not going to go into right now BECAUSE IT WAS SO RIDICULOUS. There was also a bit of it from the same guy in my freshman year that involved him taking pictures of me with his laptop during our English class. YEAH.) /seriously no more personal anecdotes
• Oh great and now Colin is enabling Harry to go into expository Quidditch talk, just in case you forget how the games works (YES I KNOW PEOPLE READING THIS BOOK WON'T HAVE READ THE SERIES 1923423 MILLION TIMES LIKE I HAVE)
• "They're startin' ter think [the Defense Against the Dark Arts position]'s jinxed." LOL HAGRID THAT WILL ACTUALLY BE CONFIRMED FOUR BOOKS FROM NOW
• The wizarding form of racial slurs comes up for the first time in this chapter. Come to think of it, I think this is the first book that wizarding blood plays an important role in the plot. Stupid magical Nazis :(
• Ron has a slug belching attack all over a Special Services to the School award. GEE I THINK THAT AWARD WILL BECOME IMPORTANT LATER.

Chapter Eight: The Deathday Party

• "Oh, no, it's not good enough for Sir Properly-Decapitated Podmore." I WISH THERE WAS MORE NEARLY-HEADLESS NICK IN THE MOVIES BECAUSE I CAN JUST SEE JOHN CLEESE SAYING ALL THESE LINES.
• MOANING MYRTLE. (Also, I find Hermione's comment of "it's awful trying to have a pee with her wailing at you" to be hilarious for some reason.)
• So the mysterious voices actually first came up in the previous chapter, but I feel like I should mention them sometime. In this chapter, I'm surprised Ron and Hermione don't think Harry's gone completely nuts because honestly I would be a little suspicious if a 12-year-old kid started talking about how he can hear a voice that wants to kill someone.

Chapter Nine: The Writing on the Wall

• "Excuse me, but I believe I am the Potions master at this school." I LOVE HOW SNAPE JUST BURNS LOCKHART LIKE THIS ALL THE TIME. Also: "I AM SNAPE, THE POTIONS MASTER."
• OMG SO WHEN YOU KNOW ABOUT GINNY'S INVOLVEMENT IN THIS WHOLE THING EVERY THING THAT COMES OUT OF RON'S MOUTH SOUNDS TOTALLY INSENSITIVE. (Then again, Ron has never been the king of sensitivity.)
• Hermione doesn't have her copy of Hogwarts, A History WHAT IS THIS
• Ron's fear of spiders comes up for the first time. I love how he's all "I don't like the way they move" because I have a friend who is just as afraid of spiders as Ron is and her reasoning is similar--more speficially, she pretty much dislikes anything that has more than four legs.
• Lol Percy being shocked that Ron was in a GIRL'S BATHROOM OMG SCANDAL. (Also, lol at Ron earlier being all OMG GIRLS BATHROOMS HAVE COOTIES)
• I'm surprised that it's Ron who first brings up the possibility of Draco being the Heir of Slytherin, because usually it's Harry making leaps of logic like that (see: the entirety of Half-Blood Prince where he's all DRACO MALFOY IS TOTALLY A DEATH EATER).

Chapter Ten: The Rogue Bludger

• WHY DO WE NOT SEE MORE OF HARRY BEING FORCED TO REENACT SCENES FROM LOCKHART'S BOOKS IN CLASS LOL
• So Lockhart claims he cured a werewolf using the Homorphus Charm... later of course it's revealed that he didn't actually do that but presumably there was someone who did do it but that doesn't make sense because if there was a spell that cured werewolves CLEARLY SOMEONE SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT TO USE IT ON LUPIN.
• WHY DO I PICTURE DRACO MALFOY AS SEIFER ALMASY ALL THE TIME LOL
• Dobby I'm sorry but you are such an annoyance in this book BECOME AWESOMER RIGHT NOW, PLEASE.

Chapter Eleven: The Dueling Club

• So two of the pages in this chapter are literally taped together in my attempts to repair the broken binding on the book when I was younger. All my original copies of my Harry Potter books are in such bad shape except for Deathly Hallows. Actually I think my Order of the Phoenix original copy is in pretty good shape except part of the cover that my mom spilled hot chocolate on, and it's my second copy that's in slightly worse shape because it has weakened binding.
• Disarming Charms are used for the first time in this chapter OH HEY ISN'T THAT THE SPELL THAT SAVES HARRY'S ASS COUNTLESS TIMES LATER ON?
• "Just do what I did, Harry!" " What, drop my wand?" LOCKHART WHY ARE YOU SO INCOMPETENT
• So everyone hears Harry speaking Parseltongue for the first time. OH HEY FORESHADOWING THAT HE CAN SPEAK IT BECAUSE VOLDEMORT CAN AND HE IS SECRETLY PART OF VOLDEMORT'S SOUL.
• Ernie MacMillan is such a douchebag in this chapter omg.

Chapter Twelve: The Polyjuice Potion

• Hey it's the first appearance of Fawkes! He totally won't save Harry's ass at the end of the book!
• "Draco Malfoy was making loud, snide remarks about his new sweater from the Slytherin table." Okay, so when I read this at first I was like "WTF IS SO GREAT ABOUT DRACO'S NEW SWEATER" and then I realized that "snide remarks" would indicate making fun of it so then I was like "WHY THE FUCK WOULD DRACO MAKE FUN OF HIS OWN SWEATER" and then I realized that he was probably making fun of one of the Weasley sweaters. /me not understanding anything
• The password to the Slytherin common room is "pure-blood." GEE THAT'S NOT AN OBVIOUS PASSWORD AT ALL. At least the Gryffindor ones are always either obscure words or in Latin.

Well, I'd love to continue but that's six chapters already and I don't want to make this too long so I'll be finishing Chamber of Secrets up tomorrow hopefully. AND THEN IT'S PRISONER OF AZKABAN TIME OMG.