Guardian
Title: Guardian
Author: Fabfan
Fandom: All My Children
Pairing: Bianca/Frankie
Rating: PG-ish
Disclaimer: Not my characters
Summary: Sometimes it's what happens after you live that makes all the difference.
If I die young, bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Sink me in the river at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song
The sharp knife of a short life, well
I've had, just enough time
Bright.
Really Really bright.
That was the first thing that popped into Frankie’s head as she tried to open her eyes. She blinked a few times then shut them, the bright whiteness too much for her. She groaned and rubbed at her stinging eyes, wondering why in the hell someone was shining a big bright light right in her face.
Her hands stopped.
There were only two times a big bright light would shine on her face.
Either she was about to get arrested by some rookie cop who got his kicks by acting like a badass and sticking his flashlight directly into her face or she was in the hospital. Well, she didn’t hear any sirens or see any flashing blue and red. Plus there was no annoyingly authoritative face ordering her to show her hands and put them on top of her head. So, cops were out.
That meant she was in the hospital.
Blinking again, she fought to open her eyes against the harsh light. Why would she be in the hospital? She didn’t feel any pain, and unless they’d already given her a ton of meds, she should feel something, right? And wait a second, there wasn’t any needle shoved in her hand or arm, cause both were moving quite freely as she blocked the light and squinted. So, no cops, and possibly a hospital but no pain or needles yet.
But, why would she be in the hospital? She didn’t remember doing anything to warrant a trip there. No crazy Kanes were out driving around. She’d just been…she’d been…Frankie felt her stomach drop. She had no idea what she’d been doing. She couldn’t remember. Why couldn’t she remember? What was going on? Had someone hit her in the head or something? Maybe Mama Kane trying to defend her daughter again or her crazy aunt reacting to their meeting. That would definitely put her in the hospital, but where were all the people? Shouldn’t she at least be hearing nurses or doctors or machines or something?
Where was Bianca?
Was Bianca hurt? Did something happen to her?
As her eyes finally adjusted, Frankie scrambled to her feet from where she’d been lying down. Her heart pounded wildly in her chest as her thoughts tumbled over each other in rapid succession. Where was Bianca? Was she ok? Had they been together when she’d been knocked out?
Frankie opened her mouth to call out for someone, a doctor had to be close by if this was a hospital, when her gaze landed on her surroundings.
Her jaw promptly dropped and her eyes widened.
“What the hell?” Frankie breathed out as she took in where she was. It was like a giant room, but there were no walls or doors or windows. It looked like the place went on for miles. There was no furniture or anything. It was empty.
And the whole thing was white.
“Welcome, I’m glad to see you’re awake.” A cheerful voice spoke up from behind her.
Frankie spun around, her hands rising instinctively. A few feet away stood a man of about medium height, his blonde hair perfectly coiffed and a pleasant smile on his plain face. He was dressed from head to toe in white. It actually looked like a white robe the Romans wore in her old history textbook in high school.
Setting her jaw, Frankie shot him a defiant look, “Who the hell are you?”
The man continued to smile, “My name is Peter.”
Ok, that told her nothing. “What is going on? Did you do something to me?” She hid the worry from her voice, filling it with tough bravado. She wasn’t going to show this whacko Peter guy that she was at a disadvantage.
Peter gently shook his head, “Mary-Francis, there is no need to be worried or frightened. I assure you, everything is alright.”
“Yeah, whatever you say.” She needed to get out of there as fast as possible. Then, it hit her, “How do you know my name?”
Peter took a step toward her, and she warily took a step back. “Mary-Francis, I will not harm you. I need you to listen to me.”
“Stop calling me that.” Frankie muttered, “And I think I’ve heard enough.”
Peter smiled softly, “Frankie, then, it is alright. You are safe. Please, let me explain.”
“Explain?” Frankie almost laughed at that, “How about you let me go? How’s that sound?”
“I’m afraid you can’t leave.”
“The hell I can’t.” she’d been in worse situations than this. She could take this guy easily and figure out how to get back to Bianca. She couldn’t let her be alone, not with Vanessa creeping about like some roach. Well, that wasn’t exactly true. She was going to leave town to protect Bianca from that loon, but at that moment, she had to see her. Had Peter done anything to her? Was he working for Vanessa too?
Peter must have been a mind reader, “Bianca Montgomery is safe and unharmed. She is not here with us, and won’t be for quite some time. Your Aunt Vanessa is not here either, and I do not work for her.”
“Ok, great.” Frankie subtly let her gaze roam around. There had to be a way out of there.
“Frankie,” Peter held up a hand, “please listen to me. This is very important.”
Frankie shook her head, “How about you listen to me. I’m getting out of here. Either you’re going to let me go, or I’m doing it myself. No matter what, I’m not sticking around here.”
“There is only one other place to go, and I do not believe you truly want to be there.”
“What?” Frankie pointed a finger at him, “Never mind. Just back off, dude.” She began to walk backwards, keeping her eyes on Peter. She wasn’t about to turn her back on this weirdo.
Peter silently held up a hand, and it was like a brick wall suddenly appeared right behind Frankie. Her back smashed into the barrier, jarring her. She didn’t remember seeing any walls. Her hand swung back and felt around for what it was, but all she felt was thin air.
“Frankie, please.” Peter beckoned her forward.
Frankie snapped her head around to look behind her. There was nothing there. But, she couldn’t move past it. She rammed her shoulder into it, but it didn’t move. It was like some force field from Star Wars. But, that stuff wasn’t real.
“What is going on?” she jammed her shoulder again and again into the barrier, but nothing happened. She felt a trickle of panic seep into her veins, cold as ice, and she worked harder against the barrier, “What did you do?”
“Frankie, it is ok.”
“Ok?” was this guy insane? “Let me out of here!”
“Frankie, please.” He tried again.
Giving up, Frankie stepped away from the invisible wall. She was breathing hard, and fear began to mix with the panic, causing her to be even more on edge, “Damn it, let me out of here! I didn’t do nothing, alright? Whatever sick game you’re playing, play with someone else.”
Peter shook his head, “I know this is strange and you are scared, but you have no need to be. I can explain where you are.”
“Then start explaining.” Frankie rubbed at her shoulder. She paused as she caught a peek at her clothes. “And what happened to my clothes?” she was dressed in a plain white t-shirt and white cotton pants. She didn’t own cotton pants, and she didn’t remember wearing a white shirt. Had this guy taken her clothes, too?
Peter carefully walked toward her, “Frankie, it is alright.”
“Stop saying that.” Frankie snapped.
Peter halted and held out his hands, palms up, “I have no intention of harming you. You are in a safe place. You cannot be hurt here.”
Frankie rolled her eyes, “Yeah, where am I? Heaven?”
Peter smiled, “Yes.”
Frankie blinked.
She blinked again.
“You are nuts, you know that?” incredulously burst out. She shook a finger at him, “Stay away from me.”
“Frankie, it’s ok.”
“Ok?” she stumbled to the side, still unable to move backward, “Are you some apocalypse freak saying the world’s gonna end and stuff?”
“No. I understand this is difficult to hear,”
“Difficult to hear?” Frankie interrupted. She waved her hand viciously, “You’re saying I’m in heaven. Heaven? Only dead people go there.”
Peter nodded, “Yes.”
Frankie shook her head, “You’re saying I’m dead?” She chuckled bitterly, “You think I’m dead.”
“You are dead, Frankie.”
“I’m not dead!” Frankie shouted.
“I’m sorry.”
Frankie glared at him, panic ramping up again. Dead? She wasn’t dead. “I can’t be dead. I’m not dead.” If she was dead, she would know it. Dead people know these things. And who comes up and says something like that to you?
Peter watched her for a moment, “Do you remember how you got here?”
Frankie opened her mouth to reply, but nothing came out. God, she didn’t remember. She…she remembered being with Bianca. She finally told her she loved her. It had been the scariest moment of her life, and she knew she shouldn’t have done it. Not with Vanessa lurking in the shadows and her own plan to skip town. But, how could she not? Bianca deserved to hear it. The way she looked after Frankie said those words - it made it all worth it. But, what happened after that?
“You did something to me. Hit me in the head. I blacked out.” Frankie mumbled. That had to be it.
Peter didn’t even blink, “How does your shoulder not hurt after crashing into the barrier? Or how is there a barrier at all, for that matter?”
Her shoulder didn’t hurt. At all.
“After Bianca left, do you remember going to the park?”
Now she did. It was like a movie playing out in her head. She went to the park and found one of Vanessa’s drug dealers. She scored some weed for cheap and lit up. She needed something after being with Bianca. Bianca loved her. No one else had ever loved her. She loved Bianca back, and that never happened before. It was terrifying. She didn’t know how to handle it. Top it off with the fact that she was thinking about leaving to protect Bianca from Vanessa…it was too much for her.
“You met a boy there.”
JR. She took him back to her room. She was so messed up with the weed and everything crashing down around her, “Oh god.” What had she done? “Bianca,”
Peter looked at her sadly, “She left and soon you sent the boy away.”
Frankie felt her chest tighten and her stomach churn. What had she done? She’d…she kissed that guy. She almost…and Bianca had seen it. How could she do that to Bianca? How? God, she was such a screw-up. She could never treat anything nice. No wonder everyone said she was a good-for-nothing. Bianca, she was amazing. How could she do that to her? The way Bianca’s face fell when she saw them - Frankie felt like her heart was being squeezed it hurt so badly.
“Someone else showed up after they were gone.” Peter continued.
Frankie nodded, tears in her eyes. She’d written that letter to Bianca, telling her she really did love her. And she did. She loved Bianca more than anything. More than herself, but that wasn’t saying much cause she tended to hate herself most days. Bianca, though, made her feel like she was worth something. Frankie covered her face with her hands. She’d hurt Bianca. She never wanted to do that to her. Not Bianca. Anyone but her.
“Frankie?” she didn’t even know Peter had moved closer till his hand rested comfortingly on her shoulder.
What was wrong with her? Had she always been this bad? Maybe Erica had been right, she was evil.
“Frankie, what’s done is done. You are human. You make mistakes.” Peter soothed.
Frankie didn’t believe him. She couldn’t. No one made mistakes like her.
“Do you remember?”
Frankie bit her lip and sniffled. She’d decided to leave town. She’d hurt Bianca so much, and she’d only do worse if she stayed. Bianca deserved someone so much better than her. Someone who would treat her right. Who knew how to love. So, she began to get her stuff, but some man showed up. He looked kind of familiar, but she didn’t know his name. He said something about how no one double-crosses Proteus. Then he…
“He shot me.” Frankie whispered. He’d pulled out a gun and shot her before she could do anything. “H-He…” she gulped as her throat closed up. She remembered laying there on Opal’s floor, bleeding. Bianca’s locket was in her hands. She’d been fighting with herself over leaving it or taking it. Bianca should have it, it was special to her. It was her heart. But, Frankie wanted it. Even after all that happened, she still wanted it so much. It meant hope. It meant someone actually could love her. It meant Bianca was still with her.
“It’s alright.” Peter rubbed her shoulder.
Frankie bit her lip, her teeth sharply digging into the soft flesh, but she didn’t feel any pain. How could this have happened? The images flashed across her vision over and over, replaying that day in a never ending cycle of confusion. Her mind fought to work out what it all meant. What did this mean? She had been shot, but how did she end up there? And where was there?
Shot. She’d been shot.
Her hands flew to her chest, frantically patting around, moving down to her abdomen. There had been blood and pain. There wasn’t anymore pain. There wasn’t...there wasn’t any blood. She looked down at her body, desperately searching for a wound. She didn’t see anything. All she saw were the white clothes fitted to her frame.
This guy...Peter must have done something to her. He took her clothes, and he brought her to this stupid place. Was he in on all of it? Vanessa’s clean up man? The back-up to the one who shot her?
“Frankie, I assure you, you are alright. I do not work with Vanessa.”
“Shut up!” Frankie violently shrugged off his hand. “Just...shut up.” None of this made sense. None of it. She was shot! And now...now she was stuck in some random place with a crazy guy. She had to figure this out. What did she remember? There had to be an answer.
The scene played out again in her head. She saw the man with the gun, heard the shot ring out. The feel of the carpet against her skin as the pain blossomed from her chest. She couldn’t breathe. She remembered it was so hard to take in air. She tried so hard to stay awake. If she stayed awake, everything would be ok. Someone would find her, help her. She wouldn’t...die.
“I’m not dead. I can’t be dead.” Frankie’s head shook back and forth. “It’s not possible.”
“This is difficult to comprehend, and I am sorry for your loss, but you are dead.” Peter spoke gently.
“Stop saying that! I’m not dead!” Frankie growled. “I can’t...how can I be dead?” tears slowly crept toward the corners of her eyes, “This isn’t real. This isn’t...” it kept repeating over and over. The gun, the sound of the bullet exploding from the muzzle, the force of the impact as it collided with her chest. The taste of the blood as it filled her mouth and trickled across her face, the harshness of the carpet against her cheek as she gasped for air.
The silence as her eyes finally slipped closed.
Her hands shakily rose to her face, covering it as a sheen of water spread over her hazel orbs. There was no explanation for how she got there, or where there was, or why she was in these damn clothes. That man put a bullet in her and left her there alone. No one came. No one was with her. She had fought so hard to keep breathing, her eyes never straying from the locket in her hands. She wanted to concentrate on it. It gave her something to hold onto, it was a reason to live. The locket meant Bianca, and while Bianca might hate her, Frankie loved her. She loved her, and she fought to live if only to see her one more time. To tell her she was sorry. That Bianca was the only one she wanted. That she was a screw-up and messed everything up, but she loved her more than anything in the whole world.
But, she couldn’t, because she stopped breathing. She stopped taking in air, and everything faded away. It all went dark.
“I’m dead!” Frankie hoarsely cried out, her hands falling from her face in shock as the truth set in. “I’m…oh god…he…” her watery eyes shot up to look at the man, “Did Bianca…” Oh god, had Bianca come back? Did that man go after her too?
“He was gone too soon for anyone to see him. He didn’t go anywhere near her.”
Frankie shuddered as sobs threatened to spill out. The spark of relief at his words was short lived as it all came crashing down on her. Dead. She was dead. She’d been killed. Murdered. Her Aunt had her shot because for once she decided to listen to whatever speck of a conscious she had found after meeting Bianca instead of going along and ruining other people’s lives and hurting them without a care like she normally did. What was she saying? She still had ruined and hurt people. The last time she would ever see Bianca, she had caused the other girl to cry. Her last moments on earth were used to destroy the one person she ever loved.
She was bad. She always had been. She couldn’t even love someone.
Peter attempted to touch her shoulder, “Frankie,”
She staggered back, wiping furiously at her cheeks where tears had left wet trails, “Stop. Just stop. Is this how it starts? Butter ‘em up before going in for the heavy torture?”
“No, Frankie. We have to explain your situation to you, and it is difficult, but it must be done.”
“Then what? Huh? You going to break out the chainsaws and the fire? Shouldn’t it be hotter in here?”
Peter nearly frowned, “Frankie you are in heaven, not hell.”
A sob broke out, “I get it, alright! I know what I am. I-I hurt people, and I ruin lives, and all I do is cause pain.” She deserved to be in hell. That’s where she was supposed to end up. Even her mother said it before she ran away from home.
“Frankie, you are not evil. You made mistakes, yes, but no more than others. You belong here.”
“Bullshit!” Frankie yelled. Her entire body shook, “I never belonged anywhere near there. I knew I wasn’t going there. A-And how I treated Bianca…I-I am bad.”
“No you are not.” Peter stared at her, “Mistakes will be made, but we look at what is inside your heart. You have a kind loving soul, Frankie. You loved Bianca, and you cared for others. An evil person would not choose to give up what they want most if it meant protecting or helping someone else.”
Frankie pursed her lips, “I didn’t protect anyone.” She didn’t protect Bianca. She broke her heart and left her alone with Vanessa and her thugs. Frankie took another step back. Her head ducked for a moment, and she battled for control. She had to get it together. She might be going to hell, but she damn well wasn’t going to give the devil the satisfaction of fooling her.
Inhaling deeply, she lifted her face and brought her hands together, clapping. Peter just watched as she clapped again and again.
“Good job. Really, nice one.” Frankie sarcastically congratulated him. “The whole heaven thing was a real slick move. Make me thing I got in the pearly gates before whisking me off to eternal misery. Gotta hand it to ya. Ya know how to start off running.” Her voice trembled and tears littered her eyelashes as she plastered a mocking look on her face. If she was going to hell, she wasn’t going to allow this guy to see her cry. She was Frankie Stone, and no small time jerk like this guy was going to break her.
“Frankie, this is not hell. You have been welcomed into heaven, for this is where you truly belong. There is nothing evil or bad about you. I concede you made errors in judgement while on earth, but that does not negate the fact that you are a good soul. You are a kind gentle soul.” He paused before continuing, “I do not believe Bianca Montgomery would love someone unless their soul was inherently good.”
“Don’t talk about Bianca. You don’t know her.” Frankie barked. Bianca loved her...and she threw it in her face by getting high and almost sleeping with some boy. Hell, she was sent to Pine Valley to ruin Bianca and Erica anyway. The whole reason she met Bianca was to make her life terrible.
“You must not condemn yourself forever for a few mistakes. While you did not meet Bianca Montgomery under ideal circumstances, you did the right thing in the end.”
“Bianca might belong in heaven, but not me. Not me.”
“She will join us when the time comes, but Frankie, I implore you to believe me, heaven was always meant for you.” He stepped up to her and lightly grasped her shoulders. He peered into her hesitant gaze, “Mary-Francis Stone. You are a good soul. You are a gentle soul. Do not let your judgement be clouded by past mistakes and errors. Look deep within and you will find the truth.”
Later, after the confusion and total discombobulation of discovering she was dead and quite possibly not going to hell dissipated, Frankie would double over laughing at the corniness of his plea. However, with his words currently ringing in her ear, all the blonde could do was listen. She closed her eyes and she didn’t know what it was, but something shot through her. Her eyes snapped open, and she believed him.
He smiled at the recognition in her eyes, “Welcome to heaven, Mary-Francis.”
“Heaven, huh?” Frankie gulped and turned around.
Peter nodded, “Are you ready?”
Frankie smirked with as much bravado as she could muster, “Sure, whatever. Let’s see this place.”
Peter waved his arms and it was like a door opened, revealing a flash of bright light. When the light melted away, Frankie’s eyes widened, “Wow.”