At the Wolfram & Hart Party

[f_iverson]

I have no idea why I'm here. I'm not having any fun. All I see are a sea of celebrities and various pretty people. I feel overdressed in a tux. Silly me; I actually expected this to be a professional, formal affair. Should have known a fundraiser for a horny appendage thrown by UC Sunnydale's former Big Jerk on Campus would just completely suck

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[lily_anne]

*smooths now-messy hair*

I need another drink...

*heads to bar, notices someone on the way there*

Well, well...look who's here...

Freddy. How...well, surprising, to see you. Thought you were Mr. "I have no friends"..what on earth are you doing at the party of the year?

*smirks*

[parker_abrams]

*speechifying*

...now, when somebody told me that the campaign slogan was "Boobies for All" I had to scoff - but I was wrong in my scoffing. Let me tell you why...

[f_iverson]

*after being caught off guard, regains composure and smirks back*

I could ask you the same thing, Miss I-Hate-The- World. And, as far as having no friends, you should prepare yourself, because the way you've been behaving, you might just find yourself without any as well.

If you must know, I'm here strictly in a press-related capacity. Not that it should concern you.

Oh, and could you try to show a little more cleavage in that thing? You're not quite showing enough.

[parker_abrams]

*speechifying*

...now, I SPOKE to the campaign manager, Mr. Gordo, who sadly, could not be in attendance tonight due to family matters. He showed me, as I'm about to show you, that the boobies are METAPHORS for the deep, pressing needs of the state of CALIFORNIA...

[lily_anne]

Oh, I'm not worried about me...I'm making new friends, more and more...

*looks at Parker giving his speech and smiles*

*glares at Freddy*

Press related? Right. You're out digging for dirt here? I'm surprised you aren't digging through the trash cans for Brad and Jen's table scraps...

Or maybe you're here looking for another drug buddy.

[parker_abrams]

*speechifying, winks quickly at Anne*

...you SEE? California has to reach out, and grab a handful! It can't get what it wants unless it makes a bold, brash move, ladies and gentlemen! Sure, we might get slapped a little, but nothing ventured, nothing gained right? A little firm application, and we can make this state right again!

[f_iverson]

*sees the look Anne gives Parker, narrows eyes suspiciously*

You know, your hair looks kind of mussed. I didn't know you'd be on the job tonight yourself.

[parker_abrams]

*rallying*

What do we want?

Crowd: BOOBIES!

Who gonna grab 'em?

Crowd: HAND!

What do we want?

Crowd: BOOBIES!

Who gonna grab 'em?

Crowd: HAND!

[lily_anne]

*feels palm begin to twitch*

What's wrong, Freddy? Jealous he had the balls to actually be a man and step up? Like you never did? Upset he didn't just follow me around like some whipped puppy dog?

No, Freddy. I don't have to be on the job to appreciate a man when I see one. You? You're just pissed that I didn't see one in you.

[parker_abrams]

*rallying*

ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR
Hope the Hand gets some more!

FIVE, SIX, SEVEN, EIGHT
Grab some boobies for this state!

[f_iverson]

*Damn, did he write this crappy speech himself?*

You know, Anne, I shouldn't be surprised you let him fuck you. I went to school with him. He has a thing for dim-witted blondes. I just didn't know he'd scrape the absolute bottom of the barrel to find one.

[parker_abrams]

*descending from stage*

THANK YOU! REMEMBER the only thing EVIL in this campaign is not going for the target when you see it! VOTE FOR HAND!

[lily_anne]

*slaps Freddy, hard, across the face*

How dare you? You, who got me kidnapped? You, who works for a fucking tabloid? You, who ran around with drug dealing-demons in college? How dare you presume to be above ANYONE?

You, Freddy, are the scum of the earth. After all...look what you came from. *glares*

[parker_abrams]

*runs over, disturbed by the...er...disturbance*

Woah. Woah. Anne... IVERSON?

Is this guy bothering you, Anne? Wait, no, don't answer that.

Iverson. You should have enough material for your story. Out. Now. And don't think this means your off the hook.

[f_iverson]

*reels from the slap, both physically and emotionally*

Well, Ms. Steele, at least I don't just run out and sleep with the first sleazeball who shows interest. And who are you to talk about ME hanging with demons? Or have you forgotten that loser Whistler?

*to Parker*

Forget it, Abrams. Forget our deal. I don't want your fucking story, and I don't need your money. And frankly, your speech sucked.

[parker_abrams]

Okay, Iverson. You want to play hardball, I can do that. But first you get out of my building. NOW.