Summer Holiday
We met because he spat on me. Well, not intentionally, but I'm very blunt like that. We were sitting in our meeting. It was a hot hot summer's day. He was sitting next to me. He had come in late.
He made a comment, and a small piece of his saliva flew out of his mouth and landed on my skirt. I pointed to it, and told him 'You just spat on me'. He looked remotely embarrassed. Then I explained to him how I always point out obviously embarrassing situations like this, in an attempt to make the situation a little less embarrassing. We had a giggle and he continued talking. And so it began.
We had known each other for a while, but not very well. I saw him playing soccer one night, and I was reminded that I have always been attracted to soccer players. This was a passing thought. And I contemplated no more into it.
A while later we saw each other again. We were talking about my job, and he was telling me how he was unsure about what he wanted to do with his life. He told me he loved sports, and loved working with 'difficult' cases. I told him I would think about what he may be able to do.
So then we went away. A huge group of us, about 30. He was there too. On our first night there, in the circus tent, I tols him my thoughts about what he could do career wise. He was laying on a pillow which at the end of the meeting, ended up in my lap, with his head on it. He asked me if I was comfortable. I told him I was and was obligated to ask the same of him. He replied with 'Hell yeah'. We then parted our ways for the night.
The next day we were to speak again. He was doing a memory verse which corresponded with the talk I was giving the following day. He asked if we could spend some time later on that day and work on it together. I told him we could.
When this time came around, he took me down to the river and we sat on the grass. We finished our work, and than sat and chatted for a while. Then a mutual friend joined us, and so he left, and went back up to the camp. I stayed by the river talking to this friend for a while.
When I came back, I showered and returned to the circus tent. He asked me where I had been after he left the river. I was touched that he had wondered this. We held an event for the children this night, to which I helped him cheat. He asked me at the end of this night who I had a crush on. I didn't tell him. However, he was adamant to know.
The next day I wanted to go shopping. We came along with three others, and we bought a game. When we returned he and I walked down to the river again and played this game. I wanted to go swimming, so i pulled him in with me. We chatted for hours, which resulted in my telling him all my deepest darkest secrets, including the fact that I had developed a crush on him. He responded well to this, telling me he had hoped it were him. We then packed up and returned to camp.
This behaviour continued between us. Come new years eve, I found myself being loved by young children, whom urged me to dance with them for 2 hours straight. He had told me he would ask me to dance this night, but seeing as I had had a lot of attention from the children, I did not think this was going to happen.
Then, when I finally got a break, he came and sat with me and held my hand. One of my friends pulled me away and asked me what I was doing. I explained to him that we were just great mates. He accepted this, and I went back to find him gone.
The second last song of the evening was a slow song. He asked me to dance and we went outside and slow danced under the stars. I pointed out a set of stars for him, and told him these were his. He told me I was the best.
We walked down to the docks, he holding my hand. We sat there and watched the fireworks. When midnight arrived he gave me a long lingering hug, stroking my hair. We walked back to camp hand in hand. We lay on a grassy hill just out of sight of the rest of our camp, and chatted for hours. We finally were made to go to bed.
We woke up the next morning and had an unfortunate vistor. The flirtatious remarks were lingering in our voices, unfortunately they had to be repressed. I could only think of him however.
That night he told me he had feelings for me.
The next morning we played cards, and he lay in my arms. we would talk forehead to forehead, and look into each other's eyes. We decided to go to plasterfun painting and get artistic. Whilst there many children thought we were boyfriend and girlfriend, and he jokingly proposed. We walked back with our works of art, hand in hand.
I gave my testimony that night, something I would never have been able to do without him. he had given me so much strength, so much confidence in myself, and afterwards he told me how proud of me he was. He recognised that I was very nervous, something none of the others had picked up on. He was beginning to get to know me very very well. He helped me out so much that evening.
But all good things must come to an end. The holiday finished, we hugged and said goodbye. I was unsure about when I would see him again. He asked me if he could come over the following day. I gratefully accepted.
So now I sit here, wondering what I am supposed to do. Wondering what God wants me to do, wondering what he wants me to do. Who knows?
I hate it when you hold my hand
And breath down my throat
This CPR is suffocating
When will you realise
The more you try to keep me alive
The ore I'm dying
In your arms
Your arms that hold me,
Your mouth that smiles
Your fingers that stroke me
Your eyes that stare
Your skin that grazes
Your heart that loves me
Stop holding me close
You're pushing me away
He made a comment, and a small piece of his saliva flew out of his mouth and landed on my skirt. I pointed to it, and told him 'You just spat on me'. He looked remotely embarrassed. Then I explained to him how I always point out obviously embarrassing situations like this, in an attempt to make the situation a little less embarrassing. We had a giggle and he continued talking. And so it began.
We had known each other for a while, but not very well. I saw him playing soccer one night, and I was reminded that I have always been attracted to soccer players. This was a passing thought. And I contemplated no more into it.
A while later we saw each other again. We were talking about my job, and he was telling me how he was unsure about what he wanted to do with his life. He told me he loved sports, and loved working with 'difficult' cases. I told him I would think about what he may be able to do.
So then we went away. A huge group of us, about 30. He was there too. On our first night there, in the circus tent, I tols him my thoughts about what he could do career wise. He was laying on a pillow which at the end of the meeting, ended up in my lap, with his head on it. He asked me if I was comfortable. I told him I was and was obligated to ask the same of him. He replied with 'Hell yeah'. We then parted our ways for the night.
The next day we were to speak again. He was doing a memory verse which corresponded with the talk I was giving the following day. He asked if we could spend some time later on that day and work on it together. I told him we could.
When this time came around, he took me down to the river and we sat on the grass. We finished our work, and than sat and chatted for a while. Then a mutual friend joined us, and so he left, and went back up to the camp. I stayed by the river talking to this friend for a while.
When I came back, I showered and returned to the circus tent. He asked me where I had been after he left the river. I was touched that he had wondered this. We held an event for the children this night, to which I helped him cheat. He asked me at the end of this night who I had a crush on. I didn't tell him. However, he was adamant to know.
The next day I wanted to go shopping. We came along with three others, and we bought a game. When we returned he and I walked down to the river again and played this game. I wanted to go swimming, so i pulled him in with me. We chatted for hours, which resulted in my telling him all my deepest darkest secrets, including the fact that I had developed a crush on him. He responded well to this, telling me he had hoped it were him. We then packed up and returned to camp.
This behaviour continued between us. Come new years eve, I found myself being loved by young children, whom urged me to dance with them for 2 hours straight. He had told me he would ask me to dance this night, but seeing as I had had a lot of attention from the children, I did not think this was going to happen.
Then, when I finally got a break, he came and sat with me and held my hand. One of my friends pulled me away and asked me what I was doing. I explained to him that we were just great mates. He accepted this, and I went back to find him gone.
The second last song of the evening was a slow song. He asked me to dance and we went outside and slow danced under the stars. I pointed out a set of stars for him, and told him these were his. He told me I was the best.
We walked down to the docks, he holding my hand. We sat there and watched the fireworks. When midnight arrived he gave me a long lingering hug, stroking my hair. We walked back to camp hand in hand. We lay on a grassy hill just out of sight of the rest of our camp, and chatted for hours. We finally were made to go to bed.
We woke up the next morning and had an unfortunate vistor. The flirtatious remarks were lingering in our voices, unfortunately they had to be repressed. I could only think of him however.
That night he told me he had feelings for me.
The next morning we played cards, and he lay in my arms. we would talk forehead to forehead, and look into each other's eyes. We decided to go to plasterfun painting and get artistic. Whilst there many children thought we were boyfriend and girlfriend, and he jokingly proposed. We walked back with our works of art, hand in hand.
I gave my testimony that night, something I would never have been able to do without him. he had given me so much strength, so much confidence in myself, and afterwards he told me how proud of me he was. He recognised that I was very nervous, something none of the others had picked up on. He was beginning to get to know me very very well. He helped me out so much that evening.
But all good things must come to an end. The holiday finished, we hugged and said goodbye. I was unsure about when I would see him again. He asked me if he could come over the following day. I gratefully accepted.
So now I sit here, wondering what I am supposed to do. Wondering what God wants me to do, wondering what he wants me to do. Who knows?
I hate it when you hold my hand
And breath down my throat
This CPR is suffocating
When will you realise
The more you try to keep me alive
The ore I'm dying
In your arms
Your arms that hold me,
Your mouth that smiles
Your fingers that stroke me
Your eyes that stare
Your skin that grazes
Your heart that loves me
Stop holding me close
You're pushing me away