life.
i really havent updated this thing in a while. its kinda funny how life turns on you. you think you have everything going for yourself when all of a sudden everything funnels down. i always thought that messing with feelings was a fun thing to do..well its really not that great when you experience it yourself. i guess life has its way of turning on you. i keep dwelling on the past and i NEED to stop. its not going to change anything. whats done is done. on another note: i cant stand school. i seriously dont want to do ANYTHING anymore and its bad. this is the year i need to actually get my act together. i havent even appiled to a school yet. lame. i just want summer back so bad. i miss the days of driving around all day, hanging out with people, rushing home every night at 11:50, and being free. i am now umemployed due to cheerleading but hopefully that will all change soon and maybe it will help me to not be so lazy. i dont know what it is that i want from everyone. its like im never satisfied. i almost have a bitchout with my friends everyday. thats not a real friendship. i wish i had one really good best friend that i could share everything with. all my friends have something special about them that i like but its not enough. i mean, brittany has the personality, lindsey has the look and style, christina has the partyness, chelsea has the "i dont give a shit-ness", christine has the motherness, lauren has the attitude, and kaitlyn has the freeness. idk what im trying to get at here, im just letting things out...lately ive been hanging out with meggie and mackenzie. i can honestly say i love them. i realized im going to miss them so much when we all leave cause they are just kickass girls. they are drama free and love to party and dont care what people think of them and i love that..my love life has been on hold. i think im just going to concentrate on other things this year and wait till next year to find more mature guys. plus theres no hotties around here anyway..i actually havent been spending alot of time home. since im not grounded anymore, i sleep out alot. i go to new egypt every weekend and i love it and dont care what anyone has to say about it. they are more real than you and know how to have a kickass time and really care about you. i also met a few girls from different towns that i really want to get to know. they know how to leave the drama behind and focus on a good time. this entry was just to put the cards out on the table about whats going on in my life so far. i plan on updating it because i need something to do so i can avoid homework =]. i guess some things never change.