It's all my fault..
I really feel like crap right now. Manda and her feller well they had big ol fight and what not and she told me somethings about what happend and some of it was about her always being at fault and her being used to being stepped and hurt and all that and talking to her about all that just jolted all those times I've ever hurt and stepped on her and treated her like crap. Than there was this trust issue thing and yeah, the way Manda is today is because of me. Her not trusting and even more use to being treated like crap and stepped on.. yeah I did that. Maybe if it wasn't for me, she'd be in better shape.. ugh I just hope everything works out for her, she so deserves the very best. She's such an amazing woman, even if she's the way she is now, she's still a wonderful person, I hope her feller realizes that and stops being a baby and sees that before it's too late.
Well what else can I talk about. Oh yeah me and my old lady had a bit of our own fight today. She got really pissed at me because I didn't go and buy her something when I went to take her home after work. For awhile now, since I've been getting money she's always wanting me to buy her stuff. Yeah I know, she's my girlfriend and that's what boyfriends do, buy their gals stuff. BUT when they don't have any money or extra money to spare, they don't. She doesn't understand that for some reason. I can have 20 bucks that has to last me two weeks, I'd need it for either ciggerettes (yeah I smoke get over) or for gas. And she'll ask me if I'll buy her an ice cream from mcdonalds or french fries or she wants me to buy her those stupid fake finger nails at walmart. She ALWAYS wants me to buy her things and when I say no she throws a fit and says that I'm always mean to her and treat her like crap. What the fuck? I don't mind spending money on her when I fucking HAVE the money too. But when I just have enough to get me to the next pay check, fuck yeah I'm not going to blow it on stuff like that. Gaw, sometimes, she makes me feel like complete shit. When she says I'm mean to her when I say no, it's like telling me I'm not being a good boyfriend, feels like I'm being the worst boyfriend. I love that girl to death, never loved anyone as much as I love her, but with each fight over this stupid crap is making me think she's only with me because I have a job and money. And than she wants me to wake up earlier than usual to pick her up and bring her back her so we can wait til 7 30 er so to go to school. Well news flash, sometimes I don't hear my alarm or I'm too tired from work to get up early she than she'll walk to my house. Yeah I feel bad that I have to make her walk and yeah I should try and get up and get her because I don't like her walking that far by her self that early in the morning or at any time. But.. you girls need to understand that us guys.. we're not perfect, we're not superman. We just can't get up and give you every single fucking thing you want, I wish I could, I really do But I can't. And as much as I hate to say it, it's starting to push me away when she throws this fits. But yeah I'm done bitching. I'm going to watch some Smallville and than going to bed.
I hope everything works out for you Manda, if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm always here for you. Either email, yahoo or phone call, if I don't answer, leave a vm and I'll get back to asap. I luv ya girl <3
P.S. I'm sorry for everything I've ever done to you.. you didn't deserve it, don't always blame yourself for everything. It's not your fault, it's actually my fault. I just hope that someday you'll forgive me.
Later masturbaters.
Well what else can I talk about. Oh yeah me and my old lady had a bit of our own fight today. She got really pissed at me because I didn't go and buy her something when I went to take her home after work. For awhile now, since I've been getting money she's always wanting me to buy her stuff. Yeah I know, she's my girlfriend and that's what boyfriends do, buy their gals stuff. BUT when they don't have any money or extra money to spare, they don't. She doesn't understand that for some reason. I can have 20 bucks that has to last me two weeks, I'd need it for either ciggerettes (yeah I smoke get over) or for gas. And she'll ask me if I'll buy her an ice cream from mcdonalds or french fries or she wants me to buy her those stupid fake finger nails at walmart. She ALWAYS wants me to buy her things and when I say no she throws a fit and says that I'm always mean to her and treat her like crap. What the fuck? I don't mind spending money on her when I fucking HAVE the money too. But when I just have enough to get me to the next pay check, fuck yeah I'm not going to blow it on stuff like that. Gaw, sometimes, she makes me feel like complete shit. When she says I'm mean to her when I say no, it's like telling me I'm not being a good boyfriend, feels like I'm being the worst boyfriend. I love that girl to death, never loved anyone as much as I love her, but with each fight over this stupid crap is making me think she's only with me because I have a job and money. And than she wants me to wake up earlier than usual to pick her up and bring her back her so we can wait til 7 30 er so to go to school. Well news flash, sometimes I don't hear my alarm or I'm too tired from work to get up early she than she'll walk to my house. Yeah I feel bad that I have to make her walk and yeah I should try and get up and get her because I don't like her walking that far by her self that early in the morning or at any time. But.. you girls need to understand that us guys.. we're not perfect, we're not superman. We just can't get up and give you every single fucking thing you want, I wish I could, I really do But I can't. And as much as I hate to say it, it's starting to push me away when she throws this fits. But yeah I'm done bitching. I'm going to watch some Smallville and than going to bed.
I hope everything works out for you Manda, if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm always here for you. Either email, yahoo or phone call, if I don't answer, leave a vm and I'll get back to asap. I luv ya girl <3
P.S. I'm sorry for everything I've ever done to you.. you didn't deserve it, don't always blame yourself for everything. It's not your fault, it's actually my fault. I just hope that someday you'll forgive me.
Later masturbaters.