Group to Battle Honor Killings
Grail76 Posted the following in his journal, (after the line breaks) and I found it important to share. I hope that one day situations like this cease to make the news- not that I truely believe that rape and brutality will ever not be a human problem, but because women like her speaking out will be the norm, and not the exception.
The woman in this story (whose full story is linked to below) is incredibly brave, strong, resilient, and I respect any one who refuses to stay silent in a culture where no other option is given to women.
I normally try to be respectful of other cultures- even if the women are not as liberated* as we are in America. At some point I draw the line; for me this goes beyond a cultural issue of subserviance to men- there is no honor to be regained in rape, there is no honor to be regained in death. This is just my view, just my belief, I am sure many many people will disagree with me.
Honor is gained not in hiding from your guilt, which is what death allows you to do, in a rather severe way- but by facing what it is that you have done, accepting the consequence's.
This woman did nothing wrong. She did not suffer logical consequences.
If she had, take her freedom, but do not take away a part of herself, the thing which makes her woman. Do not make her a stranger to her own body, do not brutalize what was meant to be a loving act and gift between consenting people. That is worse then death. In a way, that is the worst dishonor.
That is just a cultural difference that I cannot ever understand or accept. I can accept when a woman is told to be silent in the presence of men, I can accept them being taught to be nothing more in public then pretty nothings, accept even if I don't agree, but rape, I cannot accept.
Those men put a part of them inside a part of her, and it will never completly wash away. They graciously volunteered to commit this atrocity. Where is the honor in that? What kind of man finds release at the stripping away of a woman's dignity?
I hope she knows that she is beautiful for what she has done. I hope every woman who has ever spoken out- to the media, to the courts, to family and loved ones, knows how beautiful and strong and courageous they are.
The worst thing they did to her was expect her to be silent. Perhaps that is the worst part of this yet, the worst part of any rape or abuse.
Don't be silent.
-N
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I posted a piece from the NYT recently about Mukhtaran Bibi's story, how a town council in Pakistan ordered her gang raped and how she, instead of killing herself over her "shame" took them to court and used the money from a lawsuit to start a school for girls. Many asked how they could send her money. She has a website that lets you use a british version of paypal to send her money. The NYT times piece today also brings her situation up to date.
http://www.mukhtarmai.com/
http://www.nytimes.com/2005/03/05/opinion/05kristof.html?th
Mukhtaran's life illuminates what will be the central moral challenge of this century, the brutality that is the lot of so many women and girls in poor countries. For starters, because of inattention to maternal health, a woman dies in childbirth in the developing world every minute.
In Pakistan, if a woman reports a rape, four Muslim men must generally act as witnesses before she can prove her case. Otherwise, she risks being charged with fornication or adultery - and suffering a public whipping and long imprisonment.
Mukhtaran is a hero. She suffered what in her society was the most extreme shame imaginable - and emerged as a symbol of virtue. She has taken a sordid story of perennial poverty, gang rape and judicial brutality and inspired us with her faith in the power of education - and her hope.