(no subject)
Bypass surgery. It's not what he originally wanted and the surgery (for stents) was supposed to take place tomorrow. I feel vaguely. I'm not very good at seeing myself anymore, hence the repeated no comments bullshit. I don't really want to talk about it. That's what I have a friggin therapist for. Cognitive parallels: thinking about family, for English paper, thinking about comics as the new American mythology, for mythology in literature class, recurring memories, the music I listen to when I'm driving. Restless. Forgetful. I wouldn't want to not acknowledge this. I will drive to Ariane and Erik's house when class is done, at 7. By then the surgery will be over.
I wouldn't choose to have them saw open my ribs either. 60% blockage, 90% blockage, 2 others. I have very high cholesterol for someone my age, something in the 180s. People keep calling the goddamn house at ungodly hours even though we haven't really told anyone and they sometimes don't even know who I am. Well, I will see Dr. Hott this week and talk to her. Until then, sullen posts on livejournal, just mapping stuff out for later. Because, I guess, the amount of type I spend talking to myself in my head is hilariously abnormal, and it's all working stuff out. At least I don't do it out loud like mom does and grandma did. If I talk to someone, I want to talk to them. If it's their job, like Dr. Hott, okay, I guess I'll talk to them. Otherwise, I prefer to listen. You guys have good conversations to read. It is nice to read them.
Dad was all sleepy last night. We are sleepy the same way too. Geez. Family.
I wouldn't choose to have them saw open my ribs either. 60% blockage, 90% blockage, 2 others. I have very high cholesterol for someone my age, something in the 180s. People keep calling the goddamn house at ungodly hours even though we haven't really told anyone and they sometimes don't even know who I am. Well, I will see Dr. Hott this week and talk to her. Until then, sullen posts on livejournal, just mapping stuff out for later. Because, I guess, the amount of type I spend talking to myself in my head is hilariously abnormal, and it's all working stuff out. At least I don't do it out loud like mom does and grandma did. If I talk to someone, I want to talk to them. If it's their job, like Dr. Hott, okay, I guess I'll talk to them. Otherwise, I prefer to listen. You guys have good conversations to read. It is nice to read them.
Dad was all sleepy last night. We are sleepy the same way too. Geez. Family.