baby, baby, baby.
The baby came two weeks ago and I held it and fell in love with him like four thousand times. When _______ went into the hospital I went to the liquor store and grabbed a pint of JD. Later at the bar, I continually checked my phone and then went home after draining a pitcher of Old Style in less than 1/2 an hour. People kept asking me why I was so anxious and I would say, "Because this baby has been playing with my emotions for two god damned long and now he needs to stop fucking around!"
The day after he was born me, Erin, and Lorrie drove home and saw him. For my money he is the most beautiful baby I've ever seen. I held him in my arms and when ________ went to the bathroom I looked down on his beautiful little innocent face and said, "I'm you're Aunt Katy. I am going to help you be cool and I'm never going to lie to you." ________ told us all the details of the birth including a phrase that I simply can't shake out of my head. "And then suddenly, swoosh, there's this waterfall of amniotic fluid."
Pregnancy sounds painful.
Which reminds me of a joke I heard from my friend.
How many women does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just sit in the dark and bitch.
The day after he was born me, Erin, and Lorrie drove home and saw him. For my money he is the most beautiful baby I've ever seen. I held him in my arms and when ________ went to the bathroom I looked down on his beautiful little innocent face and said, "I'm you're Aunt Katy. I am going to help you be cool and I'm never going to lie to you." ________ told us all the details of the birth including a phrase that I simply can't shake out of my head. "And then suddenly, swoosh, there's this waterfall of amniotic fluid."
Pregnancy sounds painful.
Which reminds me of a joke I heard from my friend.
How many women does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just sit in the dark and bitch.