And Then There Was You 10
And Then There Was You
Chapter 10: Ships
a/n: this chapter went slightly.. different than what i initially wanted, but hopefully it's okaaaaay. enjoy ;u; see yall in 2 months
Baekhyun sat by the front door of the Park’s living room with anxiety and nerves that he couldn’t suppress despite the countless times he tried by pacing back and forth in the room. Yoora had left to get Sehun and Chanyeol’s mother and father were upstairs, preparing the older man’s belongings for the trip, leaving the brunet alone in the silence downstairs. By the time his ears picked up on the sound of the door knob turning, Baekhyun was already an emotional wreck, but he did his best to hide it the moment Chanyeol walked in with Kyungsoo in tow.
Noticing how the latter was at a loss for words, Chanyeol smiled and decided to break the silence himself. “So… I think it’s safe to say that it went well. Right, Soo?”
Nodding, Kyungsoo smiled. He hesitantly let go of Chanyeol’s hand and ran over to Baekhyun, washing away the last of the brunet’s worries that afternoon the moment they reunited for a hug. Then, before Baekhyun could ask, the details of the six year old’s time together with his father flowed out of him. “We had ice cream and he said I could call him dad now.”
Raising a brow, Baekhyun cocked his head at the boy. “Did he?”
“Dad said I can live in Seoul with him.”
“Oh.” For a split second, Baekhyun’s heart dropped, and it was obvious enough to make Kyungsoo soften his face, almost realizing what he had implicated.
“But...dad also said that you--”
“I think,” Chanyeol said, interrupting him as he came up from behind and put a hand on his son’s head, “that it might be better if I talk to him about that in private.”
“Okay.” Pursing his lips, Kyungsoo turned his eyes back to Baekhyun. “Are you leaving now?”
“We’re leaving in about an hour, but I packed some snacks for you in the kitchen,” Baekhyun said as he began to unbutton Kyungsoo’s wet raincoat. “I’ve already set up your futon in the other room and put away your clothes in the closet for the next few days.”
Kyungsoo nodded again, shrugging off the jacket. “Will you be back soon?”
“It’ll only be a couple of days like last time.”
“Can we do stuff?”
“Um… We’ll see.” Glancing up at Chanyeol, Baekhyun met his eyes and saw the way the latter was smirking as he put the umbrella in his hand away. Shaking his head, the brunet turned his attention to Kyungsoo’s boots. “Mr. Park and I will talk about it and make plans.”
“You should call dad by his name now,” Kyungsoo said, lifting up a leg as Baekhyun pulled on his footwear.
“Oh, I should?”
“Yes…”
“I agree with Kyungsoo’s point,” Chanyeol teased, adding to the boy’s cause. “Besides, I don’t mind you calling me by my first name in front of him. I think it’ll help make things more casual.”
Once he finished taking off his son’s rain gear, Baekhyun got up and sighed, raising a brow at his ex. “One day and you’re already starting to influence him.”
Shrugging, Chanyeol softly chuckled. “It’s in his genes.”
Baekhyun rolled his eyes as he gently used an arm to move Chanyeol aside in order to reach the hangers near the door where he promptly hung the yellow raincoat. “I’ll think about it,” he said, playing along despite knowing that he’d most likely begin to feel comfortable speaking to him more informally even with Kyungsoo present. “Anyways, I’m glad that things went okay and that both of you seem happier.”
Reaching out, Chanyeol touched Baekhyun by his waist, surprising him. “What about you?”
His first instinct was to respond openly, but after reminding himself that Kyungsoo was watching the both of them with wide and anxious eyes, Baekhyun decided that there were things better left unsaid and saved for a later time. “I’m happy, too,” he finally said, offering a smile to reassure both of them that he felt the same way. “Now, can you be a helpful daddy and take Kyungsoo in the dining area for his snack?”
Snorting, Chanyeol rolled his eyes, but didn’t argue. “I’d be happy to,” he replied, walking over and putting a hand on Kyungsoo’s back. “Where’s it again?”
“In the fridge. The middle rack,” Baekhyun answered.
Chanyeol winked, startling the brunet who didn’t expect that flirtatious act. “Got it.”
-
-
When the bus arrived at the station, Baekhyun could feel Chanyeol stand next to him, watching it as it pulled in. His only possession was his backpack, though the same couldn’t be said about the giant who skipped out on the light-packing, opting to use a duffle bag, which he had put in the bus’ under storage. He probably overpacked, but Baekhyun wasn’t planning on commenting about it.
The sun was beginning to set, painting the sky in orange hues. Though it wouldn’t take long to arrive at the farm, it was already clear that it’d be dark by the time they arrive at their destination. There weren’t many people coming off the bus and there were only a handful of men loading on, making the process go by a lot faster. Mr. Park decided to sit and accompany a personal friend of his, so Baekhyun decided to diverge and looked for a seat near the middle. Looking over his shoulder, he saw Chanyeol behind him with the gut feeling that the giant was intending to sit next to him.
Inwardly sighing, Baekhyun found two empty seats next to one another and occupied the one nearest to the window. For a split moment, he looked up and saw Chanyeol’s eyes, almost questioning as if it was alright to take the unoccupied seat to the right of him. Then, Baekhyun gestured to the spot. “It’s all yours.”
“Only if you don’t mind me sitting next to you,” Chanyeol said, double-checking.
“I don’t,” Baekhyun reassured him. “You don’t have to sound like I can’t stand being around you. I don’t feel that way, especially now that you and I have to be co-parents. We’re going to have to be with each other more often that you’d probably like.”
As he was sitting down, Chanyeol gave him a questioning look. “More than I would probably like? Now you’re making it sound like being around you is a chore to me.”
He was merely teasing and Baekhyun was fully aware of that. “You know what I mean, Chanyeol,” he said as he pushed his backpack underneath his seat. “I just want things to be okay between us.”
“Me, too.” There was sincerity in his voice and in the way their eyes briefly met, but Baekhyun looked away, breaking the connection. “Let’s talk about normal things, then. So, how does… this entire thing work?”
“What thing? Rice planting or co-parenting? I have answers for only one of those two things.”
“Very funny,” Chanyeol said, nudging him with his shoulder. Baekhyun swayed slightly to the right as he played along. “You might not know anything about co-parenting, but you do know a lot of things about parenting in general so when we can, maybe we can talk about that, too.”
“No, we’ll definitely have to talk about parenting. It’ll be like a crash course of the last six to seven years,” Baekhyun said as he laughed, running a hand through his hair. As his laughter trailed off, he began to reminisce about all the memories (both past and recent) of Kyungsoo and his childhood… “There’re a lot of things you should know.”
“Well… You and I have about an hour to kill. We could talk about it right now.”
“Didn’t you want to talk about the farm thing just a second ago?” Baekhyun reminded him.
Chanyeol shrugged. “We can talk about it when we get there. Besides, we’re not going to be starting until tomorrow morning. I’m a little more interested on hearing what you have to say about Soo.”
“And what if I wanted to take a nap?”
“Well…” Quirking his lips, Chanyeol shrugged again. “I guess you could, but just don’t lean on me when you do. I don’t want you drooling over me. Literally.”
Flustered, Baekhyun gaped at him. “I would never.”
“Never what?”
“Drool all over you.”
“Oh, I don’t know about that,” Chanyeol said, sneaking a glance over at him before settling into his seat and closing his eyes as the smirk on his lips remained. “I know you and your habits, Byun Baekhyun. Maybe even better than you.”
“You know the habits of a stupid eighteen year old,” Baekhyun responded. “I’m twenty-six now and I’ve learned better.”
“Have you really?”
“I would say so.”
“That’s too bad, then. That old habit of yours was kind of cute.”
“Wait a minute. Are you flirting with me right now?” Baekhyun asked, cocking his head at his ex.
“Not really,” the giant replied.
“Oh--”
“But if I was, it’s not like I would tell you.”
The bus began to rumble as its engine came to life. Last calls were made before the driver took his place and had the doors shut. As soon as the bus began to move out of its slot, it finally gave Baekhyun an excuse to look at something besides Chanyeol’s (stupid) face.
“Anyways,” the brunet said after a few seconds had passed with the intent of changing the subject. “You wanted to talk about Kyungsoo so I guess I can start by telling you how he’s going in school and what-not.”
“You don’t need to tell me about that. I already know he’s smart.”
“How?”
“Because he’s really curious about everything,” Chanyeol told him with ease. It was an observation that he noticed from the very first time they met and despite sparing very few little words, Kyungsoo’s eyes always seemed to have questions he was too afraid ask. “If you don’t mind talking about it, what was he like as a baby? Everytime I think about him, I wonder what it must’ve been like for you to raise him by yourself like that…”
Baekhyun sighed, his eyes focused on the blurred trees as the bus passed on by. “Surprisingly, he was very loud as a baby. He was always crying on and off. It didn’t matter if he was hungry or tired, he was just a handful. Now that I think about it, he must’ve gotten that from you since you live to be loud.”
“But now he’s more like you.”
“Most of the time,” the brunet admitted. “Otherwise, when he really wants to say something or when he’s excited, he’ll keep talking on and on and on… I guess he’s got a little bit of both of us.”
Chanyeol opened his eyes, focusing on the ground. “Yeah…” For a few lingering seconds, they sat in silence. Maybe it was because it hadn’t hit him that hard before that they had created something together. Then, there was the reminder that he had been missing from their lives since the very beginning, and it was more bitter to think about that specific loss of time with every recollection of past, old memories. It became clear that he preferred to stay in the present and, hopefully, in the future.
“I changed my mind.”
Baekhyun turned his head in Chanyeol’s direction and raised his eyes until he found himself studying the side of the man’s face. He was noticeably troubled and yet, so resolved.
“Changed your mind about what?”
“Tell me how he’s doing in school. I want to know what he’s like,” Chanyeol said softly, making eye contact with the latter. “His favorite color, food, games… Everything he is now.”
“Chanyeol…”
“I know I couldn’t--” Chanyeol stopped himself. His jaw tightened. “I know I wasn’t there for you when he was a baby. You never told me about him and it’s all my fault because I know why you decided to raise him by yourself instead of contacting me.”
Baekhyun bit his lower lip and nodded, understanding the regret that was interlaced in the way that he spoke.
“And… I know you’re still unsure about me and this entire co-parenting thing. I get it. But things’ll be different this time.” Reaching up, Chanyeol pushed away the strands of stray hair away from Baekhyun’s eyes and smiled. “Can’t say I have the best reputation, but for the both of you, I’ll be better. Promise.”
Baekhyun was tempted to divert his eyes from Chanyeol’s gaze. As the man’s fingers brushed faintly against his face, he could feel his breathing hitch in rhythm. His charm was undeniable and Baekhyun couldn’t say otherwise when thinking about how his feelings were feeling chaotic and reckless in that moment.
He wanted to believe everything that Chanyeol was saying, and to cling to each and every promise. There was change in the way the giant carried himself throughout the day, especially when he was around Kyungsoo. At the same time, Baekhyun remained reserved and cautious when it came to blindly accepting Chanyeol’s word. However, this time around, he was willing to try and wish for the best once again, treading on ice thin hope.
“Thank you.”
-
-
The farm was poorly lit and the walk from the station was a bit of work, but Chanyeol kept his mouth shut about it and even offered to carry Baekhyun’s backpack for him (the gesture was politely declined). The few others that had accompanied them decided to stay at a group hostel for the time being, feeling more comfortable near the bars and small shops in town since, to them, it was a nice change of scenery.
When they reached the small makeshift house that was meant to house them for the next few days, it was obvious that the building was only being used sporadically around the year for the sake of work and convenience.
Chanyeol couldn’t even remember the last time he stepped foot on that land, but he did remember the house since he often referred to it as a “stupid, old shack” when he was younger. But as his father unlocked the front door and they shuffled inside after him, the memories that had filled his youth within those walls rushed back to him.
Flipping a bare switch on the wall, Baekhyun turned on the only lightbulb in the very small, tight common room. Its yellow glow was barely enough to see, and it was so dim that Chanyeol’s eyes had to readjust significantly to the low lighting situation.
“Baekhyun, it’s okay if you take the room this time,” Mr. Park announced, nodding at a room to the left of him. He set the styrofoam box he had carried by himself, which carried their food packed from home, against a wall. “Chanyeol and I will sleep out here.”
Chanyeol meant to gently oppose the notion, but to his surprise, Baekhyun managed to speak up first. “It’s alright. That room has the only cot around here and I don’t want you to hurt your back. I know you’ve been seeing the chiropractor lately, so I think it’s best if we keep the same arrangements as usual.”
“Ah, I see… I just wanted to make sure you were okay and all.”
Smiling, Baekhyun nodded. “I know, but I’ll be alright. Chanyeol shouldn’t give me any troubles. If he does, I’ll let you know.”
Chuckling, Mr. Park turned his attention to Chanyeol who was busy rolling his eyes at the remark. “I’ll let you help Baekhyun set up here. You can put your bags in the corner.”
After he left, Baekhyun turned his back towards Chanyeol and placed his backpack against the wall. Chanyeol did the same, but on the opposite side like his father had suggested. As he was doing so, the brunet moved to the hallway closet and slid the door to the side in order to access the futons.
Chanyeol walked up from behind him, intending to help. “So… Are we going to have to share one?” he said quietly enough for only Baekhyun to hear. “I wouldn’t mind. It gets kind of cold with the higher elevation, too, you know.”
When Baekhyun turned his head, he didn’t expect Chanyeol’s face to be so close. It momentarily shocked him, but within a heartbeat, he recovered and was collected enough to reply back. “Don’t be stupid. There’s two of them.”
“That’s too bad.”
Baekhyun blinked, staring at the man next to him intently. Maybe he was overthinking Chanyeol’s borderline flirtatious remarks followed by an immediate attempt at dismissal, but the brunet couldn’t figure it out. It was starting to bother him and mess with his own feelings, but he pushed those thoughts aside as he pulled out one of the futons using both arms and shoving them into Chanyeol’s own. “Here’s yours.”
Scrunching his face, Chanyeol looked down at the bedding. “When was the last time this was used?”
“Maybe about a month ago,” Baekhyun told him, grabbing his own futon. “Your father came up here a few times earlier to ready the fields. He’s also been getting new equipment slowly over the months. All the older things are starting to break down.”
“Hm…” Stepping back a few steps, Chanyeol turned around and drop his futon on the ground. “I think I’ll take this spot.”
“Right in the middle of the space?”
“Yeah.”
Baekhyun frowned. “I think you should move over and make room for mine.”
“I think there’s enough room for you, though?”
“I don’t want our futons to be touching.” Baekhyun’s eyes tried their best to calculate the amount of space they’d have in between one another, but it always came back to the same conclusion of having only very little. “No offense… I just think it might be better for us both in terms of comfortability and all.”
Chanyeol looked down at his placement. “Maybe you’re right.” Then, bending over, he moved his futon slightly to the right by a few inches. “Better?”
It hardly made any difference, but with the room dimensions, it was the best they could do. “I think that’s probably as good as it could get…” he said under his breath before turning away. “You should go help your father.”
“What about you?”
“What about me?”
“Don’t you need help with anything else?”
Looking around, there wasn’t really much left to do. Shaking his head, Baekhyun pursed his lips. “No. This is typically all there is to it. I mean, besides unfolding everything and laying it out, we’re pretty much done.” He paused. “Besides, um… I’ll be going out for a bit. I just need to put the food we packed in the fridge first before I head for town.”
Frowning, Chanyeol looked over with slight confusion strewn across his face. “What’s in town?”
“You ask a lot of question,” Baekhyun commented.
Ignoring the remark, the giant only shrugged. “I’m curious,” he said.
Unconvinced, Baekhyun broke eye contact and walked over to the styrofoam box. “Well… I’m going to go and get a drink for myself. Maybe...de-stress with other people, I guess you could say.”
“So, by ‘drink’, I’m assuming you’re not talking about your average soda-- Here, let me help.” Striding across the room, Chanyeol knelt down and took the side dishes that Baekhyun gave over to him.
“If you want to put it that way, then yeah. Not your average soda drink. Come on. Follow me to the back,” Baekhyun ordered, balancing his items as he rose up and began making the short trip to the kitchen area, pulling open the small fridge with one hand. “I’ll arrange them. Just give them to me one by one.”
“Alright.” Chanyeol watched at the brunet stacked the containers accordingly. “About that soda thing, it sounds fun. I might want to go too.”
Baekhyun stopped, eyes slowly looking up at the giant who, in turn, looked back with the same sheepish grin on his face that had been showing up more often than not. “You want to go with me?”
“Yeah. It’s been a while. I’m sure the night life out here isn’t the same as it is in Seoul. Maybe it’ll make for a nice change of scenery. I doubt they have paparazzi here waiting for me to slip up again.”
The mere mention of tabloids and overexposure made Baekhyun inwardly cringe. It was as if, for a moment, he forgot Chanyeol’s life was constantly being photographed by overzealous fans and media outlets. Letting out a breath, Baekhyun resumed putting away the food.
“Honestly, if you want to come, then you can.”
“We can de-stress together.”
Again, Baekhyun stopped. “Chanyeol, I… Listen, I know you and I are trying to be…better, especially now that you and I are going to have to work together to raise Kyungsoo from now, but you really don’t have to try and force this relationship bonding thing, okay? I don’t want you to feel like you have to be friends with me now that we’re co-parenting. We don’t have to be friends, even. All that matters is that we get along and we’re not trying to rip out each other’s throats in front of our son.”
Just the thought of what Baekhyun was insinuating offended Chanyeol the moment he realized his words and actions were misunderstood. The air around him seemed cautious and careful, but it was also something that Chanyeol couldn’t dismiss.
Everything had been going by so fast that it almost felt like they had no room to breathe in-between each milestone. In the mix of it all were feelings lost within all the chaos of wondering about parental duties and relationships. Chanyeol could hardly blame Baekhyun for being confused and misconstrued…
In that moment, Chanyeol knew he needed to take a step back. Maybe he was approaching everything the wrong way and building their relationship in the only way he knew how to and it was obviously not working. Looking into Baekhyun’s eyes, he saw the fear and uncertainty; a man who was unsure whether or not to believe his feelings or the doubts that ran circles around his head.
And yet, he didn’t know how to break those last barriers.
Running a hand through his dark hair, Chanyeol sighed. The day had been eventful and with the trip itself aside, he could feel himself being more weary. He wasn’t in the mood to argue. “I’m not doing this because I feel like I have to, Baek, but since I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable with me around, I’ll just stay here for tonight and let you go by yourself. I’m kind of tired anyways so I might just go ahead and try to sleep soon as I send some emails if I can get a signal.”
“Chanyeol… I didn’t mean it like that,” Baekhyun said, reaching out for him and touching the giant by his arm. “I’m just saying that you don’t have to force yourself to be my best friend and follow me around just to get close to you.”
“I’m not trying to be your best friend, Baek,” Chanyeol responded, eyes dropping to where Baekhyun’s hand was gently resting. “I’m…”
Waiting, Baekhyun furrowed his brows and took a step towards the latter. “You’re what?” he asked.
“I’m...tired.” It wasn’t what he wanted to say, but neither the time nor the situation was ideal for the conversation that would’ve ensued. “But, it’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”
“But you sound mad at me. If you have something you want to tell me then you can say it.”
“It’s not…” What did he want to say? Easy? Softening his features, Chanyeol shook his head. “It’s not like that.”
“What’s not like what?”
“I’m not mad at you,” the giant clarified. When he saw the unconvinced look Baekhyun gave him, he continued. “Like I said, I’m just tired. You can go ahead without me.”
Chanyeol began walking back to the main room, knowing that Baekhyun was trailing behind him closely. They didn’t speak another word to each other and the silence was accompanied by the faint sound of insects beyond the thin walls of the house. As Chanyeol knelt beside his bags to ready himself for bed, he could feel Baekhyun’s eyes on him before hearing the brunet move farther away, eventually hearing the front door open and shut soon after.
-
-
Baekhyun didn’t go overboard, but he did have enough drinks to forget about Chanyeol by a little bit. He knew he still had to walk back to the farm house and work the next morning, so he wasn’t wasted entirely. Coupled with the reminder that Mr. Park was sleeping in the same house, Baekhyun needed to be mostly sober in order to keep quiet and prevent himself from stumbling around in the dark, making unnecessary noise.
By the time he arrived back, it was already past twelve in the morning. Before he entered the house, Baekhyun took a few minutes for himself outside, attempting to recollect and prepare himself for the task of trying to make his way over to his futon without tripping over something or--worse--tripping over Chanyeol. When he felt like he was prepared, Baekhyun unlocked the door and slowly stepped inside, moving as quietly as he could until the door shut. Even then, the creaking of the hinges were enough to make the brunet wince.
Afterwards, with his back pressed against the door, Baekhyun took off his shoes and pushed them aside. He knew that Chanyeol had placed his futon to the right side of the room, farthest from the door and nearest to the single bedroom, so it didn’t take long for Baekhyun to find his futon in the dark, but it surprised him how it didn’t feel like a large, folded lump like the way he left it. It only took seconds for him to realize that his area had already been set up, even with the pillow.
In the back of his mind, he knew that Chanyeol had done him a favor, but he was too tired to jostle the latter to thank him, and even in his mildly drunken state, Baekhyun was afraid to bother him at all. Decided that maybe it was best to give his gratitude later that morning, Baekhyun slipped under the covers. He knew that it would’ve been better to take off his clothes and change into something more comfortable than jeans and a shirt, but he just wanted to sleep.
However, trying to sleep proved to be somewhat difficult. Though his eyes were practically dying, his entire body was still high off adrenaline, which was grossly overpowering the fatigueness his body was also feeling at the same time. Annoyed, he tossed… and then he turned. Every few seconds, he repeated the same process, each time with the hope that maybe he’d tired himself and knock out. After ten minutes, he rolled over on his back and let out an exasperated groan, defeated.
“Can you stay still?”
Blinking, Baekhyun turned his head in the direction of the deep voice coming from the dark. “What the…? Why’re you still up?”
“I’m not. I woke up because of you.”
“Sorry…”
Chanyeol didn’t reply back immediately and, for a minute, Baekhyun assumed that the giant had ignored him. “It doesn’t matter. Don’t worry about it.”
If there was one thing that had been bothering Baekhyun all night, it was Chanyeol’s passiveness. He didn’t know why it annoyed him so much, but he couldn’t stand feeling like the man had something to say that he was holding back or just plainly evading. Normally, Baekhyun wouldn’t push things, but he felt a little braver then than he normally did.
“Why do you still sound so… annoyed with me?” Baekhyun asked. His tone was neutral and wondering, but even to Chanyeol’s ears, it seemed a little bothered and… sad. “I didn’t mean anything bad by what I said to you before. Was I wrong to tell you that you shouldn’t force any type of relationship between us just because of Kyungsoo?”
Again, Chanyeol’s response came delayed.
“Yeol--”
“Has it ever occured to you that I’m not trying to force anything? That I actually want a relationship with you, whether that’s romantic or not?” Chanyeol sounded upset and, in turn, Baekhyun was taken aback.
“No, I…” Baekhyun started, but he couldn’t finish. His head was already so clouded. Understanding what Chanyeol meant and what he wanted from him was so difficult that it made him feel like he was a stupid teenager again; clueless. “So, then what? I don’t understand, Yeol.”
“Then it’s fine--”
“No, it’s not,” Baekhyun insisted. “What do you mean by a relationship? Of course, we have to have one. We’re parents. I just meant that we don’t have to be attached to the hip all the time because--”
Chanyeol cut him off. “I know that’s what you meant. You don’t have to explain it to me for the hundredth time.” Groaning, he rolled over on his belly, pressing his face on his pillow. “Just go to sleep.”
With the added adrenaline in his system, Baekhyun knew that he wouldn’t be able to. “Then what do you want from me? Do you actually want to be friends again?” He paused, closing his eyes. “Because if that’s what you want, then we can do that. I just want you to stop confusing me, you know… I hate it when you do that.”
Seconds passed before Chanyeol spoke again. “What do I do that confuses you?”
“Everything… From the things you do and the things you say,” Baekhyun mumbled. He opened his eyes again and stared into the dark. “I don’t know if you know it or not, but I feel like you still play with my feelings sometimes. It might be unintentional so I never want to bring it up to you. I just don’t want to seem crazy-- I don’t know. Never mind I said anything--”
“Baek,” Chanyeol interrupted.
“Yeah?”
“When I told you that I wasn’t trying to be your best friend, I was being honest. I don’t want to just be your best friend. I’m trying to be something more.” The giant briefly stopped. The silence was almost deafening. “You probably don’t even know what I’m trying to say. How drunk are you, by the way?”
Ignoring the remark, Baekhyun pushed himself up by his elbows and turned his body in Chanyeol’s direction. “Why can’t you just be straightforward with me?”
“Oh my god…” Chanyeol groaned inwardly, forcing himself to sit upright. “You’re really dense, you know that?”
Baekhyun gaped as he sat fully upright as well. “What do you mean I’m dense?”
“You’re--” Biting down on his lower lip, Chanyeol decided otherwise and chose to stop himself. “Honestly? Let’s talk about this tomorrow. I’m tired and you should sleep off the alcohol.”
Not willing to let it end that easily, Baekhyun pushed more. “No. Why do you think I’m dense? What does that mean?”
As he lied back down on the futon, Chanyeol exhaled. “Baekhyun, I’m tired. You’re drunk, so sleep it off.”
Growling, Baekhyun grabbed his covers and wrapped himself around it before falling back down on his bed. “Fine. But when morning comes, be straightforward with me.”
“And that’s what you want? To tell you upfront about everything?”
“Yeah, I dare you,” Baekhyun said.
The challenge was slightly playful, but Chanyeol wasn’t there to play children’s games.
“Fine. Remember when you asked if I was flirting with you earlier on the bus? I was.” Then, before Baekhyun could say anything in response, Chanyeol rolled, turning his back in Baekhyun’s direction and pulled the covers over his body. “Good-night.”
- - - - - - - - -- -- -
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Chapter 10: Ships
a/n: this chapter went slightly.. different than what i initially wanted, but hopefully it's okaaaaay. enjoy ;u; see yall in 2 months
Baekhyun sat by the front door of the Park’s living room with anxiety and nerves that he couldn’t suppress despite the countless times he tried by pacing back and forth in the room. Yoora had left to get Sehun and Chanyeol’s mother and father were upstairs, preparing the older man’s belongings for the trip, leaving the brunet alone in the silence downstairs. By the time his ears picked up on the sound of the door knob turning, Baekhyun was already an emotional wreck, but he did his best to hide it the moment Chanyeol walked in with Kyungsoo in tow.
Noticing how the latter was at a loss for words, Chanyeol smiled and decided to break the silence himself. “So… I think it’s safe to say that it went well. Right, Soo?”
Nodding, Kyungsoo smiled. He hesitantly let go of Chanyeol’s hand and ran over to Baekhyun, washing away the last of the brunet’s worries that afternoon the moment they reunited for a hug. Then, before Baekhyun could ask, the details of the six year old’s time together with his father flowed out of him. “We had ice cream and he said I could call him dad now.”
Raising a brow, Baekhyun cocked his head at the boy. “Did he?”
“Dad said I can live in Seoul with him.”
“Oh.” For a split second, Baekhyun’s heart dropped, and it was obvious enough to make Kyungsoo soften his face, almost realizing what he had implicated.
“But...dad also said that you--”
“I think,” Chanyeol said, interrupting him as he came up from behind and put a hand on his son’s head, “that it might be better if I talk to him about that in private.”
“Okay.” Pursing his lips, Kyungsoo turned his eyes back to Baekhyun. “Are you leaving now?”
“We’re leaving in about an hour, but I packed some snacks for you in the kitchen,” Baekhyun said as he began to unbutton Kyungsoo’s wet raincoat. “I’ve already set up your futon in the other room and put away your clothes in the closet for the next few days.”
Kyungsoo nodded again, shrugging off the jacket. “Will you be back soon?”
“It’ll only be a couple of days like last time.”
“Can we do stuff?”
“Um… We’ll see.” Glancing up at Chanyeol, Baekhyun met his eyes and saw the way the latter was smirking as he put the umbrella in his hand away. Shaking his head, the brunet turned his attention to Kyungsoo’s boots. “Mr. Park and I will talk about it and make plans.”
“You should call dad by his name now,” Kyungsoo said, lifting up a leg as Baekhyun pulled on his footwear.
“Oh, I should?”
“Yes…”
“I agree with Kyungsoo’s point,” Chanyeol teased, adding to the boy’s cause. “Besides, I don’t mind you calling me by my first name in front of him. I think it’ll help make things more casual.”
Once he finished taking off his son’s rain gear, Baekhyun got up and sighed, raising a brow at his ex. “One day and you’re already starting to influence him.”
Shrugging, Chanyeol softly chuckled. “It’s in his genes.”
Baekhyun rolled his eyes as he gently used an arm to move Chanyeol aside in order to reach the hangers near the door where he promptly hung the yellow raincoat. “I’ll think about it,” he said, playing along despite knowing that he’d most likely begin to feel comfortable speaking to him more informally even with Kyungsoo present. “Anyways, I’m glad that things went okay and that both of you seem happier.”
Reaching out, Chanyeol touched Baekhyun by his waist, surprising him. “What about you?”
His first instinct was to respond openly, but after reminding himself that Kyungsoo was watching the both of them with wide and anxious eyes, Baekhyun decided that there were things better left unsaid and saved for a later time. “I’m happy, too,” he finally said, offering a smile to reassure both of them that he felt the same way. “Now, can you be a helpful daddy and take Kyungsoo in the dining area for his snack?”
Snorting, Chanyeol rolled his eyes, but didn’t argue. “I’d be happy to,” he replied, walking over and putting a hand on Kyungsoo’s back. “Where’s it again?”
“In the fridge. The middle rack,” Baekhyun answered.
Chanyeol winked, startling the brunet who didn’t expect that flirtatious act. “Got it.”
-
-
When the bus arrived at the station, Baekhyun could feel Chanyeol stand next to him, watching it as it pulled in. His only possession was his backpack, though the same couldn’t be said about the giant who skipped out on the light-packing, opting to use a duffle bag, which he had put in the bus’ under storage. He probably overpacked, but Baekhyun wasn’t planning on commenting about it.
The sun was beginning to set, painting the sky in orange hues. Though it wouldn’t take long to arrive at the farm, it was already clear that it’d be dark by the time they arrive at their destination. There weren’t many people coming off the bus and there were only a handful of men loading on, making the process go by a lot faster. Mr. Park decided to sit and accompany a personal friend of his, so Baekhyun decided to diverge and looked for a seat near the middle. Looking over his shoulder, he saw Chanyeol behind him with the gut feeling that the giant was intending to sit next to him.
Inwardly sighing, Baekhyun found two empty seats next to one another and occupied the one nearest to the window. For a split moment, he looked up and saw Chanyeol’s eyes, almost questioning as if it was alright to take the unoccupied seat to the right of him. Then, Baekhyun gestured to the spot. “It’s all yours.”
“Only if you don’t mind me sitting next to you,” Chanyeol said, double-checking.
“I don’t,” Baekhyun reassured him. “You don’t have to sound like I can’t stand being around you. I don’t feel that way, especially now that you and I have to be co-parents. We’re going to have to be with each other more often that you’d probably like.”
As he was sitting down, Chanyeol gave him a questioning look. “More than I would probably like? Now you’re making it sound like being around you is a chore to me.”
He was merely teasing and Baekhyun was fully aware of that. “You know what I mean, Chanyeol,” he said as he pushed his backpack underneath his seat. “I just want things to be okay between us.”
“Me, too.” There was sincerity in his voice and in the way their eyes briefly met, but Baekhyun looked away, breaking the connection. “Let’s talk about normal things, then. So, how does… this entire thing work?”
“What thing? Rice planting or co-parenting? I have answers for only one of those two things.”
“Very funny,” Chanyeol said, nudging him with his shoulder. Baekhyun swayed slightly to the right as he played along. “You might not know anything about co-parenting, but you do know a lot of things about parenting in general so when we can, maybe we can talk about that, too.”
“No, we’ll definitely have to talk about parenting. It’ll be like a crash course of the last six to seven years,” Baekhyun said as he laughed, running a hand through his hair. As his laughter trailed off, he began to reminisce about all the memories (both past and recent) of Kyungsoo and his childhood… “There’re a lot of things you should know.”
“Well… You and I have about an hour to kill. We could talk about it right now.”
“Didn’t you want to talk about the farm thing just a second ago?” Baekhyun reminded him.
Chanyeol shrugged. “We can talk about it when we get there. Besides, we’re not going to be starting until tomorrow morning. I’m a little more interested on hearing what you have to say about Soo.”
“And what if I wanted to take a nap?”
“Well…” Quirking his lips, Chanyeol shrugged again. “I guess you could, but just don’t lean on me when you do. I don’t want you drooling over me. Literally.”
Flustered, Baekhyun gaped at him. “I would never.”
“Never what?”
“Drool all over you.”
“Oh, I don’t know about that,” Chanyeol said, sneaking a glance over at him before settling into his seat and closing his eyes as the smirk on his lips remained. “I know you and your habits, Byun Baekhyun. Maybe even better than you.”
“You know the habits of a stupid eighteen year old,” Baekhyun responded. “I’m twenty-six now and I’ve learned better.”
“Have you really?”
“I would say so.”
“That’s too bad, then. That old habit of yours was kind of cute.”
“Wait a minute. Are you flirting with me right now?” Baekhyun asked, cocking his head at his ex.
“Not really,” the giant replied.
“Oh--”
“But if I was, it’s not like I would tell you.”
The bus began to rumble as its engine came to life. Last calls were made before the driver took his place and had the doors shut. As soon as the bus began to move out of its slot, it finally gave Baekhyun an excuse to look at something besides Chanyeol’s (stupid) face.
“Anyways,” the brunet said after a few seconds had passed with the intent of changing the subject. “You wanted to talk about Kyungsoo so I guess I can start by telling you how he’s going in school and what-not.”
“You don’t need to tell me about that. I already know he’s smart.”
“How?”
“Because he’s really curious about everything,” Chanyeol told him with ease. It was an observation that he noticed from the very first time they met and despite sparing very few little words, Kyungsoo’s eyes always seemed to have questions he was too afraid ask. “If you don’t mind talking about it, what was he like as a baby? Everytime I think about him, I wonder what it must’ve been like for you to raise him by yourself like that…”
Baekhyun sighed, his eyes focused on the blurred trees as the bus passed on by. “Surprisingly, he was very loud as a baby. He was always crying on and off. It didn’t matter if he was hungry or tired, he was just a handful. Now that I think about it, he must’ve gotten that from you since you live to be loud.”
“But now he’s more like you.”
“Most of the time,” the brunet admitted. “Otherwise, when he really wants to say something or when he’s excited, he’ll keep talking on and on and on… I guess he’s got a little bit of both of us.”
Chanyeol opened his eyes, focusing on the ground. “Yeah…” For a few lingering seconds, they sat in silence. Maybe it was because it hadn’t hit him that hard before that they had created something together. Then, there was the reminder that he had been missing from their lives since the very beginning, and it was more bitter to think about that specific loss of time with every recollection of past, old memories. It became clear that he preferred to stay in the present and, hopefully, in the future.
“I changed my mind.”
Baekhyun turned his head in Chanyeol’s direction and raised his eyes until he found himself studying the side of the man’s face. He was noticeably troubled and yet, so resolved.
“Changed your mind about what?”
“Tell me how he’s doing in school. I want to know what he’s like,” Chanyeol said softly, making eye contact with the latter. “His favorite color, food, games… Everything he is now.”
“Chanyeol…”
“I know I couldn’t--” Chanyeol stopped himself. His jaw tightened. “I know I wasn’t there for you when he was a baby. You never told me about him and it’s all my fault because I know why you decided to raise him by yourself instead of contacting me.”
Baekhyun bit his lower lip and nodded, understanding the regret that was interlaced in the way that he spoke.
“And… I know you’re still unsure about me and this entire co-parenting thing. I get it. But things’ll be different this time.” Reaching up, Chanyeol pushed away the strands of stray hair away from Baekhyun’s eyes and smiled. “Can’t say I have the best reputation, but for the both of you, I’ll be better. Promise.”
Baekhyun was tempted to divert his eyes from Chanyeol’s gaze. As the man’s fingers brushed faintly against his face, he could feel his breathing hitch in rhythm. His charm was undeniable and Baekhyun couldn’t say otherwise when thinking about how his feelings were feeling chaotic and reckless in that moment.
He wanted to believe everything that Chanyeol was saying, and to cling to each and every promise. There was change in the way the giant carried himself throughout the day, especially when he was around Kyungsoo. At the same time, Baekhyun remained reserved and cautious when it came to blindly accepting Chanyeol’s word. However, this time around, he was willing to try and wish for the best once again, treading on ice thin hope.
“Thank you.”
-
-
The farm was poorly lit and the walk from the station was a bit of work, but Chanyeol kept his mouth shut about it and even offered to carry Baekhyun’s backpack for him (the gesture was politely declined). The few others that had accompanied them decided to stay at a group hostel for the time being, feeling more comfortable near the bars and small shops in town since, to them, it was a nice change of scenery.
When they reached the small makeshift house that was meant to house them for the next few days, it was obvious that the building was only being used sporadically around the year for the sake of work and convenience.
Chanyeol couldn’t even remember the last time he stepped foot on that land, but he did remember the house since he often referred to it as a “stupid, old shack” when he was younger. But as his father unlocked the front door and they shuffled inside after him, the memories that had filled his youth within those walls rushed back to him.
Flipping a bare switch on the wall, Baekhyun turned on the only lightbulb in the very small, tight common room. Its yellow glow was barely enough to see, and it was so dim that Chanyeol’s eyes had to readjust significantly to the low lighting situation.
“Baekhyun, it’s okay if you take the room this time,” Mr. Park announced, nodding at a room to the left of him. He set the styrofoam box he had carried by himself, which carried their food packed from home, against a wall. “Chanyeol and I will sleep out here.”
Chanyeol meant to gently oppose the notion, but to his surprise, Baekhyun managed to speak up first. “It’s alright. That room has the only cot around here and I don’t want you to hurt your back. I know you’ve been seeing the chiropractor lately, so I think it’s best if we keep the same arrangements as usual.”
“Ah, I see… I just wanted to make sure you were okay and all.”
Smiling, Baekhyun nodded. “I know, but I’ll be alright. Chanyeol shouldn’t give me any troubles. If he does, I’ll let you know.”
Chuckling, Mr. Park turned his attention to Chanyeol who was busy rolling his eyes at the remark. “I’ll let you help Baekhyun set up here. You can put your bags in the corner.”
After he left, Baekhyun turned his back towards Chanyeol and placed his backpack against the wall. Chanyeol did the same, but on the opposite side like his father had suggested. As he was doing so, the brunet moved to the hallway closet and slid the door to the side in order to access the futons.
Chanyeol walked up from behind him, intending to help. “So… Are we going to have to share one?” he said quietly enough for only Baekhyun to hear. “I wouldn’t mind. It gets kind of cold with the higher elevation, too, you know.”
When Baekhyun turned his head, he didn’t expect Chanyeol’s face to be so close. It momentarily shocked him, but within a heartbeat, he recovered and was collected enough to reply back. “Don’t be stupid. There’s two of them.”
“That’s too bad.”
Baekhyun blinked, staring at the man next to him intently. Maybe he was overthinking Chanyeol’s borderline flirtatious remarks followed by an immediate attempt at dismissal, but the brunet couldn’t figure it out. It was starting to bother him and mess with his own feelings, but he pushed those thoughts aside as he pulled out one of the futons using both arms and shoving them into Chanyeol’s own. “Here’s yours.”
Scrunching his face, Chanyeol looked down at the bedding. “When was the last time this was used?”
“Maybe about a month ago,” Baekhyun told him, grabbing his own futon. “Your father came up here a few times earlier to ready the fields. He’s also been getting new equipment slowly over the months. All the older things are starting to break down.”
“Hm…” Stepping back a few steps, Chanyeol turned around and drop his futon on the ground. “I think I’ll take this spot.”
“Right in the middle of the space?”
“Yeah.”
Baekhyun frowned. “I think you should move over and make room for mine.”
“I think there’s enough room for you, though?”
“I don’t want our futons to be touching.” Baekhyun’s eyes tried their best to calculate the amount of space they’d have in between one another, but it always came back to the same conclusion of having only very little. “No offense… I just think it might be better for us both in terms of comfortability and all.”
Chanyeol looked down at his placement. “Maybe you’re right.” Then, bending over, he moved his futon slightly to the right by a few inches. “Better?”
It hardly made any difference, but with the room dimensions, it was the best they could do. “I think that’s probably as good as it could get…” he said under his breath before turning away. “You should go help your father.”
“What about you?”
“What about me?”
“Don’t you need help with anything else?”
Looking around, there wasn’t really much left to do. Shaking his head, Baekhyun pursed his lips. “No. This is typically all there is to it. I mean, besides unfolding everything and laying it out, we’re pretty much done.” He paused. “Besides, um… I’ll be going out for a bit. I just need to put the food we packed in the fridge first before I head for town.”
Frowning, Chanyeol looked over with slight confusion strewn across his face. “What’s in town?”
“You ask a lot of question,” Baekhyun commented.
Ignoring the remark, the giant only shrugged. “I’m curious,” he said.
Unconvinced, Baekhyun broke eye contact and walked over to the styrofoam box. “Well… I’m going to go and get a drink for myself. Maybe...de-stress with other people, I guess you could say.”
“So, by ‘drink’, I’m assuming you’re not talking about your average soda-- Here, let me help.” Striding across the room, Chanyeol knelt down and took the side dishes that Baekhyun gave over to him.
“If you want to put it that way, then yeah. Not your average soda drink. Come on. Follow me to the back,” Baekhyun ordered, balancing his items as he rose up and began making the short trip to the kitchen area, pulling open the small fridge with one hand. “I’ll arrange them. Just give them to me one by one.”
“Alright.” Chanyeol watched at the brunet stacked the containers accordingly. “About that soda thing, it sounds fun. I might want to go too.”
Baekhyun stopped, eyes slowly looking up at the giant who, in turn, looked back with the same sheepish grin on his face that had been showing up more often than not. “You want to go with me?”
“Yeah. It’s been a while. I’m sure the night life out here isn’t the same as it is in Seoul. Maybe it’ll make for a nice change of scenery. I doubt they have paparazzi here waiting for me to slip up again.”
The mere mention of tabloids and overexposure made Baekhyun inwardly cringe. It was as if, for a moment, he forgot Chanyeol’s life was constantly being photographed by overzealous fans and media outlets. Letting out a breath, Baekhyun resumed putting away the food.
“Honestly, if you want to come, then you can.”
“We can de-stress together.”
Again, Baekhyun stopped. “Chanyeol, I… Listen, I know you and I are trying to be…better, especially now that you and I are going to have to work together to raise Kyungsoo from now, but you really don’t have to try and force this relationship bonding thing, okay? I don’t want you to feel like you have to be friends with me now that we’re co-parenting. We don’t have to be friends, even. All that matters is that we get along and we’re not trying to rip out each other’s throats in front of our son.”
Just the thought of what Baekhyun was insinuating offended Chanyeol the moment he realized his words and actions were misunderstood. The air around him seemed cautious and careful, but it was also something that Chanyeol couldn’t dismiss.
Everything had been going by so fast that it almost felt like they had no room to breathe in-between each milestone. In the mix of it all were feelings lost within all the chaos of wondering about parental duties and relationships. Chanyeol could hardly blame Baekhyun for being confused and misconstrued…
In that moment, Chanyeol knew he needed to take a step back. Maybe he was approaching everything the wrong way and building their relationship in the only way he knew how to and it was obviously not working. Looking into Baekhyun’s eyes, he saw the fear and uncertainty; a man who was unsure whether or not to believe his feelings or the doubts that ran circles around his head.
And yet, he didn’t know how to break those last barriers.
Running a hand through his dark hair, Chanyeol sighed. The day had been eventful and with the trip itself aside, he could feel himself being more weary. He wasn’t in the mood to argue. “I’m not doing this because I feel like I have to, Baek, but since I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable with me around, I’ll just stay here for tonight and let you go by yourself. I’m kind of tired anyways so I might just go ahead and try to sleep soon as I send some emails if I can get a signal.”
“Chanyeol… I didn’t mean it like that,” Baekhyun said, reaching out for him and touching the giant by his arm. “I’m just saying that you don’t have to force yourself to be my best friend and follow me around just to get close to you.”
“I’m not trying to be your best friend, Baek,” Chanyeol responded, eyes dropping to where Baekhyun’s hand was gently resting. “I’m…”
Waiting, Baekhyun furrowed his brows and took a step towards the latter. “You’re what?” he asked.
“I’m...tired.” It wasn’t what he wanted to say, but neither the time nor the situation was ideal for the conversation that would’ve ensued. “But, it’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”
“But you sound mad at me. If you have something you want to tell me then you can say it.”
“It’s not…” What did he want to say? Easy? Softening his features, Chanyeol shook his head. “It’s not like that.”
“What’s not like what?”
“I’m not mad at you,” the giant clarified. When he saw the unconvinced look Baekhyun gave him, he continued. “Like I said, I’m just tired. You can go ahead without me.”
Chanyeol began walking back to the main room, knowing that Baekhyun was trailing behind him closely. They didn’t speak another word to each other and the silence was accompanied by the faint sound of insects beyond the thin walls of the house. As Chanyeol knelt beside his bags to ready himself for bed, he could feel Baekhyun’s eyes on him before hearing the brunet move farther away, eventually hearing the front door open and shut soon after.
-
-
Baekhyun didn’t go overboard, but he did have enough drinks to forget about Chanyeol by a little bit. He knew he still had to walk back to the farm house and work the next morning, so he wasn’t wasted entirely. Coupled with the reminder that Mr. Park was sleeping in the same house, Baekhyun needed to be mostly sober in order to keep quiet and prevent himself from stumbling around in the dark, making unnecessary noise.
By the time he arrived back, it was already past twelve in the morning. Before he entered the house, Baekhyun took a few minutes for himself outside, attempting to recollect and prepare himself for the task of trying to make his way over to his futon without tripping over something or--worse--tripping over Chanyeol. When he felt like he was prepared, Baekhyun unlocked the door and slowly stepped inside, moving as quietly as he could until the door shut. Even then, the creaking of the hinges were enough to make the brunet wince.
Afterwards, with his back pressed against the door, Baekhyun took off his shoes and pushed them aside. He knew that Chanyeol had placed his futon to the right side of the room, farthest from the door and nearest to the single bedroom, so it didn’t take long for Baekhyun to find his futon in the dark, but it surprised him how it didn’t feel like a large, folded lump like the way he left it. It only took seconds for him to realize that his area had already been set up, even with the pillow.
In the back of his mind, he knew that Chanyeol had done him a favor, but he was too tired to jostle the latter to thank him, and even in his mildly drunken state, Baekhyun was afraid to bother him at all. Decided that maybe it was best to give his gratitude later that morning, Baekhyun slipped under the covers. He knew that it would’ve been better to take off his clothes and change into something more comfortable than jeans and a shirt, but he just wanted to sleep.
However, trying to sleep proved to be somewhat difficult. Though his eyes were practically dying, his entire body was still high off adrenaline, which was grossly overpowering the fatigueness his body was also feeling at the same time. Annoyed, he tossed… and then he turned. Every few seconds, he repeated the same process, each time with the hope that maybe he’d tired himself and knock out. After ten minutes, he rolled over on his back and let out an exasperated groan, defeated.
“Can you stay still?”
Blinking, Baekhyun turned his head in the direction of the deep voice coming from the dark. “What the…? Why’re you still up?”
“I’m not. I woke up because of you.”
“Sorry…”
Chanyeol didn’t reply back immediately and, for a minute, Baekhyun assumed that the giant had ignored him. “It doesn’t matter. Don’t worry about it.”
If there was one thing that had been bothering Baekhyun all night, it was Chanyeol’s passiveness. He didn’t know why it annoyed him so much, but he couldn’t stand feeling like the man had something to say that he was holding back or just plainly evading. Normally, Baekhyun wouldn’t push things, but he felt a little braver then than he normally did.
“Why do you still sound so… annoyed with me?” Baekhyun asked. His tone was neutral and wondering, but even to Chanyeol’s ears, it seemed a little bothered and… sad. “I didn’t mean anything bad by what I said to you before. Was I wrong to tell you that you shouldn’t force any type of relationship between us just because of Kyungsoo?”
Again, Chanyeol’s response came delayed.
“Yeol--”
“Has it ever occured to you that I’m not trying to force anything? That I actually want a relationship with you, whether that’s romantic or not?” Chanyeol sounded upset and, in turn, Baekhyun was taken aback.
“No, I…” Baekhyun started, but he couldn’t finish. His head was already so clouded. Understanding what Chanyeol meant and what he wanted from him was so difficult that it made him feel like he was a stupid teenager again; clueless. “So, then what? I don’t understand, Yeol.”
“Then it’s fine--”
“No, it’s not,” Baekhyun insisted. “What do you mean by a relationship? Of course, we have to have one. We’re parents. I just meant that we don’t have to be attached to the hip all the time because--”
Chanyeol cut him off. “I know that’s what you meant. You don’t have to explain it to me for the hundredth time.” Groaning, he rolled over on his belly, pressing his face on his pillow. “Just go to sleep.”
With the added adrenaline in his system, Baekhyun knew that he wouldn’t be able to. “Then what do you want from me? Do you actually want to be friends again?” He paused, closing his eyes. “Because if that’s what you want, then we can do that. I just want you to stop confusing me, you know… I hate it when you do that.”
Seconds passed before Chanyeol spoke again. “What do I do that confuses you?”
“Everything… From the things you do and the things you say,” Baekhyun mumbled. He opened his eyes again and stared into the dark. “I don’t know if you know it or not, but I feel like you still play with my feelings sometimes. It might be unintentional so I never want to bring it up to you. I just don’t want to seem crazy-- I don’t know. Never mind I said anything--”
“Baek,” Chanyeol interrupted.
“Yeah?”
“When I told you that I wasn’t trying to be your best friend, I was being honest. I don’t want to just be your best friend. I’m trying to be something more.” The giant briefly stopped. The silence was almost deafening. “You probably don’t even know what I’m trying to say. How drunk are you, by the way?”
Ignoring the remark, Baekhyun pushed himself up by his elbows and turned his body in Chanyeol’s direction. “Why can’t you just be straightforward with me?”
“Oh my god…” Chanyeol groaned inwardly, forcing himself to sit upright. “You’re really dense, you know that?”
Baekhyun gaped as he sat fully upright as well. “What do you mean I’m dense?”
“You’re--” Biting down on his lower lip, Chanyeol decided otherwise and chose to stop himself. “Honestly? Let’s talk about this tomorrow. I’m tired and you should sleep off the alcohol.”
Not willing to let it end that easily, Baekhyun pushed more. “No. Why do you think I’m dense? What does that mean?”
As he lied back down on the futon, Chanyeol exhaled. “Baekhyun, I’m tired. You’re drunk, so sleep it off.”
Growling, Baekhyun grabbed his covers and wrapped himself around it before falling back down on his bed. “Fine. But when morning comes, be straightforward with me.”
“And that’s what you want? To tell you upfront about everything?”
“Yeah, I dare you,” Baekhyun said.
The challenge was slightly playful, but Chanyeol wasn’t there to play children’s games.
“Fine. Remember when you asked if I was flirting with you earlier on the bus? I was.” Then, before Baekhyun could say anything in response, Chanyeol rolled, turning his back in Baekhyun’s direction and pulled the covers over his body. “Good-night.”
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