long post about whats been going on as i haven't been posting
so linux is pretty much working correctly now... after a couple of different kernel compiles, most features are available.. infact, the only things not working the way i want them too right now are loging out of x-windows, and emulating windows programs. but that all will be straightened out soon i am sure.
anyway. i had a pretty good night hanging out at SB and JC's place. didn't get my car towed like i did last week, yay. i did get in a fight with MJ about stupid shit. it really was mostly my fault, but i don't really know what to do about it. i guess i was slightly intoxicated and was sort of looking for a fight. basically, she and her other housemates, including LM had a secret santa hat drawing, and they included their other friends in it, but not me. i guess what im pissed about is that LM told me that it was just for the people that she lived with, but then other people were involved in it too. but not me. people that don't even hang out at their house as much as i do... which is total bullshit. fuck it. thats what i told meara, whatever. i dont even fucking care anymore.
i think really this comes down to LM not appreciating my friendship as much as i think that she shoud, and it ended up coming out on MJ. cuz if there was anyone who could have invited me into the secret santa drawing it was LM, but she lied to me and told me it was just for the people that live in that house, but really there were more people involved. so i don't know how to feel.
all i know is that i'm sorry i took out my anger towards LM on MJ because she really didn't deserve it.
gah, im a total asshole, sometimes. all the time.
and my ex-gf is really unhappy, according to her Livejournal. but there isn't really anything i can do about it, cuz... welll.... she and i aren't really talking anymore, even after we tried so hard to make things better. i guess some of the shit i did just can't be forgiven. she says she can, but.. i don't forgive myself for it, and she doesn't talk to me anymore, so i guess she really doesn't either.
in brigher news, which comes sparsely in my fucked up world.. at least, the world i live in, in my head, i can't wait for school to start.
and i can't wait to get a job
and i can't wait to make something of my life
and i can't wait for things to get better
i wish things were better
i wish i was happier
don't know what else to write, even though i feel like just writing and writing and writing.
why am i such a depressed person? i don't know. but i do hope that i get over it someday.
i did meet some cool girls at the party over at LM and MJ's house though... it was nice to actually meet some new girls, i think that is what i need to do. one even invited me to her party when she was leaving cuz there were too many people there.. oh well
HOPE FOR A BRIGHER DAY
-EXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
-exxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
anyway. i had a pretty good night hanging out at SB and JC's place. didn't get my car towed like i did last week, yay. i did get in a fight with MJ about stupid shit. it really was mostly my fault, but i don't really know what to do about it. i guess i was slightly intoxicated and was sort of looking for a fight. basically, she and her other housemates, including LM had a secret santa hat drawing, and they included their other friends in it, but not me. i guess what im pissed about is that LM told me that it was just for the people that she lived with, but then other people were involved in it too. but not me. people that don't even hang out at their house as much as i do... which is total bullshit. fuck it. thats what i told meara, whatever. i dont even fucking care anymore.
i think really this comes down to LM not appreciating my friendship as much as i think that she shoud, and it ended up coming out on MJ. cuz if there was anyone who could have invited me into the secret santa drawing it was LM, but she lied to me and told me it was just for the people that live in that house, but really there were more people involved. so i don't know how to feel.
all i know is that i'm sorry i took out my anger towards LM on MJ because she really didn't deserve it.
gah, im a total asshole, sometimes. all the time.
and my ex-gf is really unhappy, according to her Livejournal. but there isn't really anything i can do about it, cuz... welll.... she and i aren't really talking anymore, even after we tried so hard to make things better. i guess some of the shit i did just can't be forgiven. she says she can, but.. i don't forgive myself for it, and she doesn't talk to me anymore, so i guess she really doesn't either.
in brigher news, which comes sparsely in my fucked up world.. at least, the world i live in, in my head, i can't wait for school to start.
and i can't wait to get a job
and i can't wait to make something of my life
and i can't wait for things to get better
i wish things were better
i wish i was happier
don't know what else to write, even though i feel like just writing and writing and writing.
why am i such a depressed person? i don't know. but i do hope that i get over it someday.
i did meet some cool girls at the party over at LM and MJ's house though... it was nice to actually meet some new girls, i think that is what i need to do. one even invited me to her party when she was leaving cuz there were too many people there.. oh well
HOPE FOR A BRIGHER DAY
-EXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
-exxxxxxxxxxxxxxx