(no subject)
Holy shit. The Polish/Ukrainian 1:1 ratio is no way present in my hands, because potatoes hate me.
I like to think of myself as a rather well-rounded chef. I can make a bordelaise sauce in my sleep, I can bake better than my grandma, I know what the hell frangipan is, I call a cone-shaped strainer a chinois, and I make a mean fucking bowl of cereal.
But for god's sake, why can't I make anything to do with a potato? During the end of June, I went on a week-long tirade against Hash-Browns. I'd wake up every morning and try it again, correcting my mistakes. I finally gave up after I used the 5lb bag up. I can't even make potato dough. After I fold the batter like three times, I pour it out, and it's too sticky to pan-fry. I naturally add some more flour until the cohesive force of the dough is greater than the adhesive force, but by then, they taste like raw flour when cooked. I can't even make instant mashed potatoes; mine come out with an obscured astringent taste. You get that when you leave your tea leaves in too long; there's no reason on earth why potatoes should taste like that. Even when I made sweet-potato fries, the slicer got stuck, I accidently let the water boil, and I threw them in the oil all too soon. I might have to spend four years majoring in potatoes. Not that I even want a career out of this, but goddamnit, the potatoes beat Dan Quayle, but they won't beat me.
Oh my god i love potatoes but they hate me.
I made a cool image macro because image macros make everything better.
I like to think of myself as a rather well-rounded chef. I can make a bordelaise sauce in my sleep, I can bake better than my grandma, I know what the hell frangipan is, I call a cone-shaped strainer a chinois, and I make a mean fucking bowl of cereal.
But for god's sake, why can't I make anything to do with a potato? During the end of June, I went on a week-long tirade against Hash-Browns. I'd wake up every morning and try it again, correcting my mistakes. I finally gave up after I used the 5lb bag up. I can't even make potato dough. After I fold the batter like three times, I pour it out, and it's too sticky to pan-fry. I naturally add some more flour until the cohesive force of the dough is greater than the adhesive force, but by then, they taste like raw flour when cooked. I can't even make instant mashed potatoes; mine come out with an obscured astringent taste. You get that when you leave your tea leaves in too long; there's no reason on earth why potatoes should taste like that. Even when I made sweet-potato fries, the slicer got stuck, I accidently let the water boil, and I threw them in the oil all too soon. I might have to spend four years majoring in potatoes. Not that I even want a career out of this, but goddamnit, the potatoes beat Dan Quayle, but they won't beat me.
Oh my god i love potatoes but they hate me.
I made a cool image macro because image macros make everything better.