Now he's wrapped around her finger
I am so in love with my husband. Sometimes it is nice to re-realize that. Not that I ever forgot, it's just that things change when you are pregnant. And then they change again when you are not pregnant anymore. There is something about having your entire body alter everything it have come to know and love about itself to put every effort into growing another human life that can make you overlook things that are so important. Being so uncomfortable for so long makes you quite irritable, which also makes it hard to appreciate the good things. I hated being pregnant. Labor and delivery?...no problem.... 9 months of pregnancy?... no good. I took things out on Russ a lot. I tried to tell myself that my personality did not change much while I was pregnant, but now that I can look back I realize that may have been true, but all of my bad traits were constantly present. In order to be even kind of bearable at work, I was miserable when I came home. But he stuck with me... And I love him even more for that now. Sometimes when he is at work, still, I get antsy just waiting for him to come home. I crave his arms around me. Of course, when he does get home, I usually go to sleep while he watches the baby. Then I wake up and let him sleep. Then he gets up and goes to work. So now that I finally appreciate him again, we rarely get to spend any time together due to sleep deprivation. But that too shall pass. But it is nice to be able to sit back, think of him, and just smile every now and then.
So I have no idea how I am going to do this whole Mommy thing once I have to go back to work. I know I still have 4 weeks left of leave but I am so dreading having to leave my tiny baby in someone else's care, much less find time to clean my house, which I can barely get to now. What I would give for a job where I could work from home.