This Is SO Funny If You Understand Why It's Funny...
MANNERISMS & PERSONALITY TRAITS:
You point with your lips.
Your other piece of luggage at the airport is a balikbayan box.
You nod your head upwards to greet someone.
You have to kiss your relatives on the cheek as soon as you enter the room
You have to raise the hands of your relatives to your forehead to bless them as soon as you enter the room.
You're standing next to eight big boxes at the airport.
You collect items from hotels or restaurants "for souvenir's sake."
Your house has a distinctive aroma.
You smile for no reason.
You go to a department store and try to bargain the prices.
You use an umbrella for shade on hot summer days.
You scratch your head when you don't know the answer.
You prefer to sit in the shade instead of basking in the sun.
You add an unwarranted "H" to your name (i.e. "Jhun," "Bhoy," or "Rhon.")
You put your hands together in front of you as if to make a path and say "excuse, excuse" when you pass in between people or in front of the TV.
Your middle name is your mother's maiden name.
You like everything that's imported or "state-side."
You consistently arrive 30 minutes late for all events.
VOCABULARY:
You say "comfort room" instead of "bathroom."
You say "for take out" instead of "to go."
You "open" or "close" the lights.
You ask for "Colgate" instead of "toothpaste."
You ask for a "pentel" or a "ballpen" instead of just a pen.
You refer to the refrigerator as the "ref."
You say "Ha?" instead of "What?"
You say "Hoy!" to get someone's attention.
You answer when someone yells "Hoy!"
You turn around when someone says "Psst!"
You say "Cutex" instead of "nail polish."
You say "for a while" instead of "please hold" on the telephone.
You say "he" when you mean "she" and vice versa.
You say "aray!" instead of "ouch!"
Your sneeze sounds like "ahh-ching" instead of "ahh-choo."
You say "air con" instead of "air conditioner."
You pronounce some words as they are spelt (E.g. "com-FOR-table.")
You say "Uy!" instead of "Oops."
HOME FURNISHINGS:
You have a portrait of "The Last Supper" hanging in your dining room wall.
You own a karaoke system.
You own a piano no one ever plays.
Your house has ornate wrought iron gates in front of it.
You have a rose garden.
You display a laughing Buddha for good luck.
You have a shrine to the Santo Niño in your living room.
You own a "Barrel Man" (shwing!)
You have a rice cooker.
You own one of those fiber-optic flower lamps.
You own a lamp with the oil that drips down the strings.
You have a giant wooden fork & spoon hanging in the dining room.
You own capiz shell chandeliers, lamps or placemats.
AUTOMOBILES:
You own a Mercedes Benz and call it "chedeng."
You own a huge van conversion.
Your car chirps like a bird or plays a tune when it's in reverse.
Your car horn can make three or more different sounds.
Your car has curb feelers on it.
You hang a rosary on your car's rear view mirror.
You have those air fresheners in a bottle.
FAMILY:
You have aunts and uncles named "Baby," "Girlie," or "Boy."
You were raised to believe that every Filipino is an aunt, uncle or cousin.
Your dad was in the navy.
Your mom or sister is a nurse.
You get smelling kisses from your grandma.
Your parents call each other "mommy" and "daddy."
You have a family member that has a nickname that repeats itself (i.e., "Deng-Deng," "Ling-Ling," "Jong-Jong" or "Bing-Bing.")
You put hot dogs in your spaghetti.
You instinctively grab a toothpick after a meal.
You order a "soft drink" instead of a "soda."
You dip bread in your morning coffee.
You refer to seasonings and all other forms of monosodium glutimate as "Ajinomoto."
"Goldilocks" means more to you than just a character in a fairy tale.
You appreciate a fresh pot of hot rice.
You eat rice for breakfast.
You use your fingers to measure the water when cooking rice.
You have a supply of frozen lumpia in the freezer.
You have an ice-shaver for making halo-halo.
You gotta have a bottle of Jufran handy.
You fry Spam and hot dogs and eat them with rice.
You think half-hatched duck eggs are a delicacy.