(no subject)
i am dreaming of a life.. i have never lived before.
a life with meaning purpose direction true love and a daily existence worthy of me.
i have this manic sense of needing change, its making me self destructive. i cant shake the thoughts so i drown them.
not to be cryptic.
i feel pretty lost. lost and pretty. functioning at a lower level.
i NEED something!
what? what? what? i cant figure it up. fuck.
my brain my brain. it plots against me. propped up against me i cant see straight. i cant see anything. need to get out of this slump.
the garbage men come around at 430 and it sounds like the world might be ending... the apocalypse at my doorstep. the skies are too full to thunder.
what it is to be this little bundle of flesh. this tired arrangement of synaptic connections.
fuck california.
DONE.
i am not sure where else now. fl? to send my things.. set up a home base, spend time with my familly and what? make a plan?
gah.
a life with meaning purpose direction true love and a daily existence worthy of me.
i have this manic sense of needing change, its making me self destructive. i cant shake the thoughts so i drown them.
not to be cryptic.
i feel pretty lost. lost and pretty. functioning at a lower level.
i NEED something!
what? what? what? i cant figure it up. fuck.
my brain my brain. it plots against me. propped up against me i cant see straight. i cant see anything. need to get out of this slump.
the garbage men come around at 430 and it sounds like the world might be ending... the apocalypse at my doorstep. the skies are too full to thunder.
what it is to be this little bundle of flesh. this tired arrangement of synaptic connections.
fuck california.
DONE.
i am not sure where else now. fl? to send my things.. set up a home base, spend time with my familly and what? make a plan?
gah.