unsettling nonsense
i love the song "photograph" by ringo starr. i've also been listening to a boatload of cat stevens, when i die i want "here comes my baby" played at my funeral.
toddlers and tiaras is on tv and it's making the bile rise and rise and rise. one mother from texas is entering her two week old son in a pagent. another mother is pitting her two daughters against each other. how these people find someone to procreate with just blows my mind. there is another show called dancing tweens about baby ballroom dancers. oh yeah tlc? well when i have kids they'll be well trained in krav maga, they'll smash every plate in your house when you babysit for them then make you a lovely ceramic bathroom mirror, and once i fall asleep they'll order useless crap from television informercials and build me things like a brick wall and entertain me by slicing open a pop can filled with cement. (google the bricky and the magic blade on youtube)
"' We drive down the road in complete silence for a few miles listening to 50 Cent. As soon as he tells us that he's into having sex, he ain't into making love, Casey turns the volume down and begins telling me the following information: " I love you so much. We're going to have the best life together. I can't wait." Every word she says makes me feel a little more like faking a stroke and pretending to lose all memory of who I was, but it's not until she looks me in the eye and says in all seriousness, "You're my soul mate," that I realize I am not going to marry her.'
today i started the new chad kultgen book, the quote above is from the average american male, i read it over the holidays and my brother was surprised that i read it. another recent great book was "sheila levine is dead, and living in new york city".
tomorrow is linda's birthday, friday is the anniversary of her son's death. sunday is the memorial golf tournament, which i am looking forward to. sitting with my brothers and neighbourhood brothers remembering and drinking and jeffy posing like he's a cardboard cutout. every year he gives a speech about chris that makes my throat burn and close up. tears are everywhere, my sinuses explode desprately trying not to cry. it's not pretty when i cry, i hide it away and suffocate it with sweatpants a dark room and a disgustingly sad movie, so if i was to be caught it wouldn't look all that bad. one of my worst moments that will continue to haunt me until i'm a little old lady is the time i got terrifically drunk one night in college and started weeping about something so insignificant. even at the time i knew how stupid it was but i couldn't stop it. visions of the crying drunk girl character from "can't hardly wait" danced in my head like sugarplums.
hi adam, told you i've been writing more.
once upon a time there was a young woman who wanted to go to sleep at a reasonable hour, but she was too upset by creepy tlc programming. sounds like the beginning of a complaint letter, one day her old feller will write complaint letters to everyone including skip the paperboy with a tragically droopy left eye. she will proofread and if the said letters are too harsh she will sneak a gingersnap cookie beside the letter. that is far in the future and is another story entirely. for another time. right now she can't sleep.
toddlers and tiaras is on tv and it's making the bile rise and rise and rise. one mother from texas is entering her two week old son in a pagent. another mother is pitting her two daughters against each other. how these people find someone to procreate with just blows my mind. there is another show called dancing tweens about baby ballroom dancers. oh yeah tlc? well when i have kids they'll be well trained in krav maga, they'll smash every plate in your house when you babysit for them then make you a lovely ceramic bathroom mirror, and once i fall asleep they'll order useless crap from television informercials and build me things like a brick wall and entertain me by slicing open a pop can filled with cement. (google the bricky and the magic blade on youtube)
"' We drive down the road in complete silence for a few miles listening to 50 Cent. As soon as he tells us that he's into having sex, he ain't into making love, Casey turns the volume down and begins telling me the following information: " I love you so much. We're going to have the best life together. I can't wait." Every word she says makes me feel a little more like faking a stroke and pretending to lose all memory of who I was, but it's not until she looks me in the eye and says in all seriousness, "You're my soul mate," that I realize I am not going to marry her.'
today i started the new chad kultgen book, the quote above is from the average american male, i read it over the holidays and my brother was surprised that i read it. another recent great book was "sheila levine is dead, and living in new york city".
tomorrow is linda's birthday, friday is the anniversary of her son's death. sunday is the memorial golf tournament, which i am looking forward to. sitting with my brothers and neighbourhood brothers remembering and drinking and jeffy posing like he's a cardboard cutout. every year he gives a speech about chris that makes my throat burn and close up. tears are everywhere, my sinuses explode desprately trying not to cry. it's not pretty when i cry, i hide it away and suffocate it with sweatpants a dark room and a disgustingly sad movie, so if i was to be caught it wouldn't look all that bad. one of my worst moments that will continue to haunt me until i'm a little old lady is the time i got terrifically drunk one night in college and started weeping about something so insignificant. even at the time i knew how stupid it was but i couldn't stop it. visions of the crying drunk girl character from "can't hardly wait" danced in my head like sugarplums.
hi adam, told you i've been writing more.
once upon a time there was a young woman who wanted to go to sleep at a reasonable hour, but she was too upset by creepy tlc programming. sounds like the beginning of a complaint letter, one day her old feller will write complaint letters to everyone including skip the paperboy with a tragically droopy left eye. she will proofread and if the said letters are too harsh she will sneak a gingersnap cookie beside the letter. that is far in the future and is another story entirely. for another time. right now she can't sleep.