(no subject)
I feel like getting off these pills is going to be so liberating, so freeing. I've been reading John Ratey's Spark, which is an utterly intense read. I literally could not put it down. There is so much great information packed into this book. And the most important parts of it, for me, are the parts about depression and anxiety: all the research done suggests that exercise can have the same effects on the mind as all the medication I'm on (Effexor, Abilify). I just recently got pulled down to 150mg of Effexor, but all the same, it's going to be a difficult road I'm on. But I feel like I can't keep doing this to my body anymore. I need to be off these pills. I need to be myself. I need to be manic and depressive and do what I do best, which is writing my poor little heart out. And if that means that I will be anxious and depressed for a while, then golly, so be it.
In the meantime, I've started working out every morning with Jeff. I mean, so far I've only worked out one day, but I'm pretty sure I can maintain this. If he can get up at 7:30 every morning and do it, so can I. And I have a goddamn free gym, that I will not always have. If I don't take advantage of it now, I'm probably not going to have another opportunity to for a long time. It's just that simple.
We'll see how it goes.
In the meantime, I've started working out every morning with Jeff. I mean, so far I've only worked out one day, but I'm pretty sure I can maintain this. If he can get up at 7:30 every morning and do it, so can I. And I have a goddamn free gym, that I will not always have. If I don't take advantage of it now, I'm probably not going to have another opportunity to for a long time. It's just that simple.
We'll see how it goes.