(no subject)
Today was sort of my thinking day.
I relized I'm being conditioned. Through-out my life I have been conditioned to just shut up. If there is a god, then it's his fault and he apparently wants me to stop talking. Why do you think when I get a 'new' friend i'm so damn talkative? Because they haven't learned that they are supposed to shun me down and scream at me to fucking shut up. Sick, sad life isn't it? But it is life, and eventually it ends.
Other thing. The 'little people' are never noticed. The small voices in the background. Hidden talents. We are only noticed if we become famous in a positive or negative aspect. Positive, if you are a singer, novelist, actress, any of that stuff that gets you on television. Negative if you are killed, kidnapped, raped, or any of those other sob story type things. But what about the little people? People like me? Try to be heard only to be shot down and disgraced so we learn it doesn't matter and just give up.
part of me wants to be noticed or go on and be successful and hopes to be heard. The other realism side knows that it doesn't matter and should go through life like I am now, hoplessly loss but doesn't care anymore. It'll end eventually. Just worry about you, don't worry about them. Don't even try to speak up anymore, just fall back.
Kind of why I'm Shadow, in my own views. I've learned to be hidden in the corners and just watch everything go by with no say of what to do. Nobody listens, so why keep trying?
i'd rather you not comment
I relized I'm being conditioned. Through-out my life I have been conditioned to just shut up. If there is a god, then it's his fault and he apparently wants me to stop talking. Why do you think when I get a 'new' friend i'm so damn talkative? Because they haven't learned that they are supposed to shun me down and scream at me to fucking shut up. Sick, sad life isn't it? But it is life, and eventually it ends.
Other thing. The 'little people' are never noticed. The small voices in the background. Hidden talents. We are only noticed if we become famous in a positive or negative aspect. Positive, if you are a singer, novelist, actress, any of that stuff that gets you on television. Negative if you are killed, kidnapped, raped, or any of those other sob story type things. But what about the little people? People like me? Try to be heard only to be shot down and disgraced so we learn it doesn't matter and just give up.
part of me wants to be noticed or go on and be successful and hopes to be heard. The other realism side knows that it doesn't matter and should go through life like I am now, hoplessly loss but doesn't care anymore. It'll end eventually. Just worry about you, don't worry about them. Don't even try to speak up anymore, just fall back.
Kind of why I'm Shadow, in my own views. I've learned to be hidden in the corners and just watch everything go by with no say of what to do. Nobody listens, so why keep trying?
i'd rather you not comment