May 03, 2007 04:23
April 1st 'til not has been a nail biting, stressful peroid for me. I've been checking my email almost every hour waiting for a response from Turner, and now with only two days before the May 4th deadline I have all but given up hope on hearing back from them. I'm afraid that my "breaking in" will not be as easy as I'd hoped. I'm afriad that I'm going to be in Bronson for at least a few more months with a job that rakes at my nerves while I build up enough funds to venture out. Then I have to figure out, where exactly this venture will take me. Do I move to Atlanta and try Turner again? Do I move out to LA like all would be media makers? Do I head to New York and get eaten alive my horrible flesh-eating zombies? Or do I find some crappy graphic design jon here in Michigan and enjoy the fruits of our bustling economy?
I don't know. What I want to do with my life doesn't really have a 12 step guide, just a collection of individual stories from others who have "made it." So what do I do? That is a question I am having some trouble finding an answer for. What I really do not want to happen is becoming complacent with my life of leisure here at home and give up on trying to do something productive with myself. I can find jobs that will pay the bills, and let me get a place of my own, but that's the ends of my means.
So I guess what I am getting at is that, I am getting at nothing and am not sure how to get there.
Blah,
Jess
PS: If only I went to business school.