This will never be easy
It's so hard to let someone go. It so damn hard to wait for so long for bad news, only expecting the worse, hoping for the best, but then finding out that you can only get what you expect in the end.
It's amazing that so many people that are so great and fantastic could doubt their worth while millions of pieces of shit go through life blissfully unaware of how horrible they really are. You would think that our society would allow for all the cream to rise to the top with all the unwanted refuse and chaff to stay at the bottom, but unfortunately, that is not the case.
What is one human's worth? The answer does not exist. We are all worth so much to those who love us and who care about us, however, sometimes we just seem worthless to ourselves. Everyone goes through this from time to time, but usually we allow those around us to pick us back up and set us right and ready.
With so many problems, drama, and downfalls that we all go through in life we have to keep those who are capable of supporting us near. Your loves, likes, friends, families, and anyone else that is a positive force in your life needs to know that you feel that about them.
It's tough to think that at some point all we are going to have of each other are memories, but it is the sad, shocking, and horribly inevitable truth. I don't want to have to spend my life remembering people that should have been kept nearer. I also don't want to feel like I have to chase after those I care about. Friendship and family should never go through phases. You don't have to see everyone everyday but you can at least make an effort to stay in regular contact with those you care about.
When you ask someone how they are doing, how many times do you really mean it? Always mean it. It's always important.
I love all of my friends, I love my family, I love Rosa, and hell, there are even people that I have never met and only talk to online that I would be bothered by something happening to them. I've developed a reputation by some to be insensitive but I can tell you right now I never have been. I've just always been blunt, but the truth is I love my people. I'd do just about anything to protect those that I love, and even some of those that I don't.
It's easy to fall in and out of contact with people, and I know that when my life has become rushed and insane that I've been a little hard to get on the phone, but in truth M-F I always check my e-mail from work on g-mail, I get on myspace frequently, and I respond to txt messages to my phone. I'm not hard to contact or find. Others are not quite so easy to contact, and that's when it becomes tough to keep up with the rest of the world. Some one like me, well no, you don't have to chase after or reach out for all the time, just let me know you're doing ok from time to time and I'm sure we'll be hanging out soon. Other folks, other friends, other family you might have... chase after if you know they don't have a way of being online or being able to be contacted any other way besides the phone.
Chase like their life depends on it, because sometimes, it might.
We all love and miss Martin. The hell that has the past 2.5 weeks is evident of what we think about the man. The lengths that we'd have gone through in an effort to bring him back to us safely would know no bounds but unfortunately we did not have that opportunity and Martin is gone and there is nothing that any of us can do about it now. It so damn tragic and hurtful, and I don't think any of us are going to be able to go through life without constant reminders of this. It's going to be hard to see a lot of movies, listen to a lot of music, and even just hear certain jokes and phrases without thinking about him. I'm here at work thinking that if I just consume myself with being busy I could at least ignore the harsh reality for 8 hours, but this has been impossible to do.
If this was in fact his choice then I hope he made the right one and that whatever caused this decision was absolutely incapable of being helped by his friends, family, and loved ones that have been forced to be without him WAY too soon. This should not have happened but we can't allow things like this to even have a chance of happening ever again.
Everyone means something to someone. Remember that, cherish that, and show that.
Later,
Rene
It's amazing that so many people that are so great and fantastic could doubt their worth while millions of pieces of shit go through life blissfully unaware of how horrible they really are. You would think that our society would allow for all the cream to rise to the top with all the unwanted refuse and chaff to stay at the bottom, but unfortunately, that is not the case.
What is one human's worth? The answer does not exist. We are all worth so much to those who love us and who care about us, however, sometimes we just seem worthless to ourselves. Everyone goes through this from time to time, but usually we allow those around us to pick us back up and set us right and ready.
With so many problems, drama, and downfalls that we all go through in life we have to keep those who are capable of supporting us near. Your loves, likes, friends, families, and anyone else that is a positive force in your life needs to know that you feel that about them.
It's tough to think that at some point all we are going to have of each other are memories, but it is the sad, shocking, and horribly inevitable truth. I don't want to have to spend my life remembering people that should have been kept nearer. I also don't want to feel like I have to chase after those I care about. Friendship and family should never go through phases. You don't have to see everyone everyday but you can at least make an effort to stay in regular contact with those you care about.
When you ask someone how they are doing, how many times do you really mean it? Always mean it. It's always important.
I love all of my friends, I love my family, I love Rosa, and hell, there are even people that I have never met and only talk to online that I would be bothered by something happening to them. I've developed a reputation by some to be insensitive but I can tell you right now I never have been. I've just always been blunt, but the truth is I love my people. I'd do just about anything to protect those that I love, and even some of those that I don't.
It's easy to fall in and out of contact with people, and I know that when my life has become rushed and insane that I've been a little hard to get on the phone, but in truth M-F I always check my e-mail from work on g-mail, I get on myspace frequently, and I respond to txt messages to my phone. I'm not hard to contact or find. Others are not quite so easy to contact, and that's when it becomes tough to keep up with the rest of the world. Some one like me, well no, you don't have to chase after or reach out for all the time, just let me know you're doing ok from time to time and I'm sure we'll be hanging out soon. Other folks, other friends, other family you might have... chase after if you know they don't have a way of being online or being able to be contacted any other way besides the phone.
Chase like their life depends on it, because sometimes, it might.
We all love and miss Martin. The hell that has the past 2.5 weeks is evident of what we think about the man. The lengths that we'd have gone through in an effort to bring him back to us safely would know no bounds but unfortunately we did not have that opportunity and Martin is gone and there is nothing that any of us can do about it now. It so damn tragic and hurtful, and I don't think any of us are going to be able to go through life without constant reminders of this. It's going to be hard to see a lot of movies, listen to a lot of music, and even just hear certain jokes and phrases without thinking about him. I'm here at work thinking that if I just consume myself with being busy I could at least ignore the harsh reality for 8 hours, but this has been impossible to do.
If this was in fact his choice then I hope he made the right one and that whatever caused this decision was absolutely incapable of being helped by his friends, family, and loved ones that have been forced to be without him WAY too soon. This should not have happened but we can't allow things like this to even have a chance of happening ever again.
Everyone means something to someone. Remember that, cherish that, and show that.
Later,
Rene