(no subject)
so hooray london... and hooray going to Bath this weekend. amazing. i am constantly in a state of disbelief that im even here. -sigh-
ive been starting to hash out some of my thoughts on dusty. ive started writing about it all - very hard to do. i think because ive been holding back much of my writing is missing that fluid thought flow i can usually achieve; but heres a few:
1. vain to vein:
Who was there in london when the vague got too strong
When the days ran together and the rain didn’t stop on me
I could have used my own cloud
A winnie the pooh rain cloud
A jump in the puddle with you before we donated blood
At a meeting that wasn’t for that sort of thing at all
There are no puddle jumpers here.
No band-aid wearing irish accents
But if I see Una ill buy her a drink for the good times
Not my first vein injection experience
Blood giving date, race chase
Pumping for a victory never thinking of the hard case
Never thinking of you or I in other veins
All that’s left of you now - physical plane
Sarah would have taken you puddle splashing
Woed you in a way I never knew how
But we ate cookies and split a bagel
Wearing hero stickers from pretty nurses who adored you
2. foundations:
Loss is not made up
Or filled in like a nest
It is left hole
I have no string to tuck in the corners
No fluff to hide my face behind
Space and space and space
Emptiness that’s biting
Chunks of me scatter
Picked up for bits of nest
Bird cries out
Bitter sweetness of flesh
Shed for you
Lost on you
If I rebuild
Hunting and collecting pieces
There would be particles of him
Sewn in about me
Under and over skin and bone
Wrapping what’s left up
If time is found
Buried in the earth near by
Pass it here
And I will wind us back
To blue yarn
To undergrowth feathers
And you can wrap yourself in me
Upon second chances I’ll hold tighter.
3.
I know that there is more to this then I’m seeing
Leaving this world
Flying out and about
Riding something new and heavy
I see you up there and I want to grab your hand
Never let go and drag you home
Baby, drag me up and up and up
Don’t leave me earth bound rotting
Ill climb the trees and let my feet bleed
Drip drying on smoky bark I cry
Act out this game one more time
Come steal me away from the classics
Tackle and slide, slip under the lids of mine eyes.
I watch Shakespeare and think of you
I breathe dusty air and fill myself with you
I walk or twitch and you’re everywhere.
so these are just the very random first drafts... we'll see what comes out of them.
ive been starting to hash out some of my thoughts on dusty. ive started writing about it all - very hard to do. i think because ive been holding back much of my writing is missing that fluid thought flow i can usually achieve; but heres a few:
1. vain to vein:
Who was there in london when the vague got too strong
When the days ran together and the rain didn’t stop on me
I could have used my own cloud
A winnie the pooh rain cloud
A jump in the puddle with you before we donated blood
At a meeting that wasn’t for that sort of thing at all
There are no puddle jumpers here.
No band-aid wearing irish accents
But if I see Una ill buy her a drink for the good times
Not my first vein injection experience
Blood giving date, race chase
Pumping for a victory never thinking of the hard case
Never thinking of you or I in other veins
All that’s left of you now - physical plane
Sarah would have taken you puddle splashing
Woed you in a way I never knew how
But we ate cookies and split a bagel
Wearing hero stickers from pretty nurses who adored you
2. foundations:
Loss is not made up
Or filled in like a nest
It is left hole
I have no string to tuck in the corners
No fluff to hide my face behind
Space and space and space
Emptiness that’s biting
Chunks of me scatter
Picked up for bits of nest
Bird cries out
Bitter sweetness of flesh
Shed for you
Lost on you
If I rebuild
Hunting and collecting pieces
There would be particles of him
Sewn in about me
Under and over skin and bone
Wrapping what’s left up
If time is found
Buried in the earth near by
Pass it here
And I will wind us back
To blue yarn
To undergrowth feathers
And you can wrap yourself in me
Upon second chances I’ll hold tighter.
3.
I know that there is more to this then I’m seeing
Leaving this world
Flying out and about
Riding something new and heavy
I see you up there and I want to grab your hand
Never let go and drag you home
Baby, drag me up and up and up
Don’t leave me earth bound rotting
Ill climb the trees and let my feet bleed
Drip drying on smoky bark I cry
Act out this game one more time
Come steal me away from the classics
Tackle and slide, slip under the lids of mine eyes.
I watch Shakespeare and think of you
I breathe dusty air and fill myself with you
I walk or twitch and you’re everywhere.
so these are just the very random first drafts... we'll see what comes out of them.