(no subject)

[evil_kangaroo]

I'm kinda scared today. Actually, really scared (almost to the point of hurling). It's the day of my biopsy and I keep feeling like I'm gonna die. I guess it's because two of my grandparents died because of medical complications while being operated on. I keep having this out-of-body dream where when they put me under I reject the anethesia and my body is flailing on the operating table. I guess I die in the end; i keep waking up before then, though. I worry way too much. But if i do die, I want you guys to know that i love all of you and I will miss you ... maybe ... depending on the hereafter. :\

ps: it's kinda strange b/c while I'm shaking in my boots, i'm also wondering what kind of trippy dreams i'll be having when i go under.