(no subject)
Ten days left and it turns out they're going to be longer days than I thought.
No big deal, I guess.
I just feel like I have PTSD sometimes when I'm spending a weekend alone without much to do.
I get so inconceivably distressed thinking about when I was so very happy spending days on end at home hanging out with my dad watching movie after movie. Just him and me.
I don't know why my head's been such a mess recently. I guess that probably screws me up pretty well, but it's beginning to affect my ability to be content in other areas. I become unpleasant to talk to so the people I really need stay away and it basically just perpetuates itself.
I'm afraid the things I need are too much to ask for. And teaching oneself not to need something anymore is much harder than one would think.
But I'm doing my best.
Two days of work left.
Hopefully after that I'll be able to stay sane and personable.
I should have enough chores and packing to do for the next week before moving to keep myself from going too nutty, but we'll see. ;)
No big deal, I guess.
I just feel like I have PTSD sometimes when I'm spending a weekend alone without much to do.
I get so inconceivably distressed thinking about when I was so very happy spending days on end at home hanging out with my dad watching movie after movie. Just him and me.
I don't know why my head's been such a mess recently. I guess that probably screws me up pretty well, but it's beginning to affect my ability to be content in other areas. I become unpleasant to talk to so the people I really need stay away and it basically just perpetuates itself.
I'm afraid the things I need are too much to ask for. And teaching oneself not to need something anymore is much harder than one would think.
But I'm doing my best.
Two days of work left.
Hopefully after that I'll be able to stay sane and personable.
I should have enough chores and packing to do for the next week before moving to keep myself from going too nutty, but we'll see. ;)