FicAlert! PoT> Tezuka's Hairy Little Problem (Tezuka. gen. ) PG Pt1
Title: Tezuka's Hairy Little Problem
Recipient's Name: Everybody from the funpotexchange
Author: Everlind
Rating: PG
Wordcount: 11 400
Pairing/Characters: Tezuka. Cameos from various other characters.
Warnings: Crack, Tezuka-style. Sort of. Kittens. Fuji. Kite being purple. Gouya. Oh, and killer whales.
Summary: Tezuka rescues a cat.
Disclaimer: The Prince of Tennis belongs to Konomi Takeshi. This story is based on characters and the universe of The Prince of Tennis, no money is being made from it.
Author's Notes: My recipient was 'the community' (funpotexchange). So I decided not to roll about in Silver Pair like a dog in its own pee and come up with something everybody might enjoy. This happened. Uhm. I'm sorry?
Thanks go to S. and M. for sparking this idea.
This story would not have happened, nor be what it is without the help of my amazing beta neooldetokyo. I am the luckiest bastard alive. Thank you.
Tezuka's Hairy Little Problem
Cold, fat drops of rain begin to splatter down as he walks back home. They leave coin-sized marks on the pavement where they fall. One plummets down the neck of his collar, raising goosebumps. Tezuka never lets his guard down; he's left the house prepared. A young woman in a business attire hurries along the sidewalk, briefcase over her head. Tezuka steps aside to let her pass and then opens up his umbrella.
The rain clatters on the clear plastic before streaking down like errant tears. Tezuka shifts his bags and thinks about his homework. There's is quite a lot of it, the exams are looming closer. After bath and dinner he might not have time to read that new book he recently purchased, or to watch his program. No matter. His grades are more important.
I won't get careless! Tezuka tells himself. He'll not allow anything to distract him.
It starts raining harder. His feet swim in his shoes and everything from mid-thigh down is soaked. Tezuka thinks about his bath again, about which bath salts he might use. It's cold. His exhales fog his glasses in steady bursts. No use in wiping them off.
Something squeaks.
Tezuka stops walking.
Something squeaks again, high and plaintive.
He cranes his head left and right, squinting against the haze covering his glasses. It comes out of an alleyway. There, on the ground near some garbage cans, is a soggy cardboard box. A puddle flows around it, oily rainbows warping across the surface.
Cautiously approaching it, Tezuka peers inside. A small something makes feeble paddling movements in the inch of water that has collected at the bottom. A paper is taped to the side, announcing:
FREE KITTENS.
It hardly looks like cat. Still, Tezuka can't stand by and let this happen. So he takes the towel he used for tennis practice, fishes for the flailing cat and wraps it carefully up. It's pathetically tiny. Its pink mouth opens wide on a mewl. It shivers.
And then Tezuka stands there with a kitten in his hands, quite at loss of what to do with it.
So he takes it home.
***
"I don't know, Kunimitsu," his mother says, eyeing the kitten skeptically. "Perhaps you could take it to the shelter?"
"Aa," Tezuka says. The kitten squirms around feebly within the folds of the towel. The once white terrycloth is gray where the fur touches.
"But I think they'll be closed by now," she adds.
"Hn," Tezuka nods. That is unfortunate.
"Poor thing. I'll get a box."
"Thank you," Tezuka says. He'd rather wished she'd take it off his hands so he could take a bath. The cat smells. He's cold. His socks are wet. He's got homework. But he always finishes what he starts.
His father lowers the newspaper and looks at his son. His glasses hang from the end of his nose. "Why don't you ask any of your friends whether they want a kitten?"
A good plan, why did he not think of that himself? He could have gone to Oishi's, or Inui's first and ask, before taking it along home. Perhaps not Inui, Tezuka reconsiders. Momoshiro had to spent the whole of afternoon practice on the toilet with cramps. Again. Who knows what he'd feed a cat.
His mother arrives with an old box that once held their microwave. It is padded with clean, but old towels. Tezuka puts the kitten inside. It sort of squats in the middle of the box, squeaking. Its tail is curled up around a hind leg.
He'll call Oishi first.
***
"Tezuka!" Oishi greets him, sounding pleasantly surprised.
"Oishi," Tezuka says. "Do you want a cat?"
"I, ah? What?"
"A cat."
"A…. cat?"
"I found one," Tezuka says. He's sitting cross-legged on a towel in his room. He's taken off his soaked pants and socks so he would not track puddles on the floor, but nothing else. He needs to take care of the cat first. The box sits against the end of his bed. Occasionally a querulous mewl comes from it.
"What do you mean?"
Tezuka tells him about the box in the alley, the rain.
"Oh, is it alright?" Oishi asks immediately after, sounding distraught. "Is it injured? Have you checked?"
Tezuka looks at the box and realizes that there may be more to this than simply rescuing the cat.
Oishi seems to realize as much. "Check whether it is bleeding anywhere and if it can walk alright."
Nudging the kitten produces another squeak. There's no blood. It crawls along on its belly when prodded. "Seems to be," Tezuka says.
"Make sure it is not undercooled from being in the cold rain so long. Oh! And try to feed it! If it is a baby you may have to give it a bottle. And make sure it doesn't have fleas."
Fleas?
Tezuka withdraws his hand. "Aa," he says. The kitten looks rumpled and sad. "So, will you take it?" Tezuka asks again.
"Oh, I am sorry, Tezuka," Oishi apologizes. "I have fish. And cats and fish… well. You get the picture."
He does.
"I see," he answers.
"Why don't you ask Echizen?" Oishi suggests instead. "He's got Karupin, doesn't he? Maybe a friend for his cat?"
A good idea, Tezuka concedes. Why didn't he think of that himself?
"Thank you," Tezuka says, and hangs up.
***
With his index finger already hovering above the buttons on his phone Tezuka realizes that he has no idea what Echizen's mobile phone number is. So, ever organized, he checks the register for the tennis club and comes up with his house number instead.
He dials it and waits. The kitten mews plaintively.
Someone picks up. "Yes?"
Tezuka does a slow blink.
"This is Tezuka Kunimitsu speaking," Tezuka says. "Might I speak to Echizen?"
"Eh?" the other person says. "Mitsi? Are you Ryoma's giiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-rlfriend?"
"Excuse me?" Tezuka exclaims.
No answer, instead the man on the phone can be heard yelling: "Ryoma! It's your girlfriend on the phone! Issit the one with the cute hair? She's got a really low voice, though."
Some mumbling and bumbling about. They appear to be wrestling. His father (or one of Echizen's rude uncles, he rather hopes) asks Ryoma about third base. Tezuka wonders what sports has anything to do with it.
Eventually Echizen seems to succeed in liberating the phone. He sounds slightly breathless and not so slightly annoyed. "Who is this?" he asks.
"Tezuka," Tezuka answers.
"…buchou?"
"Aa."
"Why are you calling?" Echizen asks, sounding vaguely perplexed. "Is it about tennis?"
"No."
"Oh," Echizen goes, sounding more like his usual self. Bored with the universe at large.
"Do you want a cat?" Tezuka asks.
"A cat?" Echizen repeats, sounding confused again.
Tezuka frowns. Why does this seem so hard for everybody to understand? His mother hollers a floor down about dinner. Tezuka's stomach rumbles in answer. Echizen breathes down the line, waiting.
"Aa," he answers.
"I have a cat," Echizen tells him.
"Maybe your cat wants a friend?" Tezuka suggests.
"No," Echizen answers. "Karupin doesn't like other cats."
"I see," Tezuka says, pursing his lips.
His mother yells once more about dinner. The cardboard box in his room sways as something thuds against the side. The kitten cries. It is probably as hungry as Tezuka is. A second thump and the box teeters over. The cat rolls out.
"Ask Kaidoh-senpai," Echizen offers, sounding distracted already. "He likes cats, but doesn't have one."
"Thank you," Tezuka tells him.
They both hang up.
Meanwhile the kitten has tottered over to Tezuka and his pressing its clammy, cold and likely flea-infested body up against Tezuka's leg. For warmth. Tezuka checks the time. It is late. Too late to disturb Kaidoh. And the cat needs looking after first.
"Seems like you will be staying the night," Tezuka remarks with a sigh.
***
They try cold fish. They try slivers of meat. They try bread soaked in milk.
The kitten refuses everything. Instead it cries and cries and cries. With lukewarm water they manage to get it cleaned up some. There's no fleas. Small mercies.
Tezuka's dinner gets cold. He still hasn't bathed. He still has homework. Eventually his parents wander off towards the living room, leaving Tezuka to try and tempt the kitten into eating and drinking. His grandfather shuffles in about an hour later. He purses his lips down at him.
"Is that cow’s milk?" he asks, indicting the broth.
Tezuka nods.
"Careless!" his grandfather shouts, causing both Tezuka and the cat to jump in surprise. Milk and soggy bread splatters everywhere. "It could give it diarrhea!"
Even though the kitten isn't interested, Tezuka pushes the bowl away instantly.
"I'll take you to the veterinarian," his grandfather says.
***
The veterinarian gives Tezuka milk replacers, in a ready-mix liquid formula, as well as suitable soap to wash it with.
"It's a very young kitten," she tells him. "You'll have to bottle-feed it regularly and take good care of it. It is lucky she's relatively healthy. Make sure to hold her close so she'll stay warm, and put heating pads in her box for the night. She just peed, so she can do that alone, but make sure she has a clean place to relieve herself."
Relieve herself? Pee? Bottle-feed?
But what about his dinner? His bath? His homework? Tennis?!
"Can't you keep it?" Tezuka asks.
"Her," the veterinarian corrects him. "And no." she puts the kitten back in his hands.
Tezuka pays with the money he'd been saving up for a limited edition book set he's had his eye on for a while. There's an additional fee for the after-office-hours service. All of his allowance disappears in a fat wallet that does not belong to him. The kitten burrows into the neck of his sweater, tiny claws sharp as needles. Her chilly nose smudges along his jaw.
It is still perching there when Tezuka tries to chew through his stale, rubbery dinner. It took him over an hour to bottle feed it, milk spilling everywhere. On his glasses, on all the rest of him, on the cat, on the table, on the floor. Somehow even on the ceiling. Another cause for his grandfather to call him careless. He won't let it happen again! A thorough washing had been in order, so Tezuka had bathed her carefully. Only then himself.
It is late. Past his usual bedtime. He still has homework.
His eyes droop a little.
The kitten wriggles in his neck. Then pees, a warm liquid squirt aimed straight down his spine.
"Careless!" his grandfather says, shaking his head.
His mother remarks how wasteful it is to run a second bath. Tezuka nods, apologizes and then thanks her. While he washes himself a second a time, the kitten flounders about in the folds of his discarded clothing.
Tezuka knows he could only have done the right thing. But he'll be glad when the kitten goes to Kaidoh tomorrow.
He scrubs his neck and back and shoulders with the loofah until his skin peels off.
***
Throughout the night, the kitten wakes Tezuka with its piteous calls. Thrice he attempts to feed it. Only once it is actually hungry. His alarm goes off at three so he can re-heat the pads to keep her from getting cold. She mewls on regardless, until, at four, Tezuka takes her into bed with him. She stops meowing, but now Tezuka doesn't dare close his eyes lest he dozes off and rolls onto her in his sleep. At five-thirty his alarm goes off again. Tezuka yawns over his breakfast, through his stretches and during his weight training.
His grandfather eyes him disapprovingly. His mother tuts and fusses.
It is necessary to feed the kitten again instead of following the English lessons on the radio as he usually does. His mother reluctantly agrees to feed her during the day, taking in the smear of milk on his cheek and the scratches on his forearms.
Of course, all the fussing with the bottle and the mess that needs to cleaned up after makes Tezuka late for practice. Three whole minutes.
For the first time in his life.
Careless! he tells himself. He won't let his guard down ever again. And yet, all he can think about is the kitten, worrying his mother will forget to re-heat the heating pads, or that she'll be unable to get her to drink. What if she escapes from his room and someone steps on her? What if Chu-sama (Tezuka's old teddy bear) isn't enough to keep her company?
As if that isn't enough Momoshiro and Kaidoh are on the courts face-to-face, fighting.
"OH YEAH?"
"YEAH!"
"SHUT UP, YOU IDIOT!"
"NO, YOU SHUT UP MAMUSHI!"
Tezuka hurriedly changes into his uniform and steps out on the courts, calculating the appropriate amount of laps all the while. Nobody is playing any tennis. He may make all of them run extra for this.
"My, my," Fuji says, shaking his head and sounding disapproving. Notably, he is not doing anything at all to prevent the scene. Tezuka frowns at him and clears his throat to assign enough laps to the both of them that they'll still be out of breath by this afternoon's practice. And that might just mean they'll not have enough left to pick fights with one another.
"Saa, Tezuka," Fuji says.
Tezuka blinks and looks down at him.
"You are late."
So he is. "My apologies," Tezuka says. "I was… held up."
"YOU SMELL, MAMUSHI!"
"WHAT KIND OF INSULT IS THAT, IDIOT?"
"Aah, guys, please-" Taka tries to pry them apart gingerly.
"What is the problem this time?" Tezuka asks Fuji.
"YOU SMELL LIKE FEET!" Momoshiro yells, helpfully.
"YOU SMELL LIKE BUTT!" Kaidoh retorts.
"No idea," Fuji replies, smiling.
"GET YOUR UGLY FACE AWAY FROM ME, YOU IDIOT!"
Tezuka notes that Kaidoh appears to be foaming at the mouth. Perhaps he'll pass out before long and they can continue practice in an orderly, disciplined fashion. Hosing them always creates enough of a mess that they'll need the rest of the morning to mop it all up. And Tezuka intends to be playing tennis (while Kaidoh and Momoshiro run laps until the soles of their trainers catch fire). He opens his mouth to yell.
"Chances of Tezuka being late… 0,01%," Inui says, looming up besides them out of nowhere. "I may need to recalculate that now, considering your, ah, hairy little problem."
"Tezuka has a hairy little problem?" Eiji repeats loudly, wrinkling his nose and dropping a pointed glance where apparently he suspects this issue to be situated. Fuji copies the gesture, but does not seem as dismayed as Kikumaru is at the prospect. Intrigued more like.
"I-" Tezuka begins to say, inching away.
"Tezuka encountered a felis silvestris catus last evening," Inui explains.
Kikumaru yelps, somersaulting away in a flash. "Is that contagious?" he queries from a what he judges to be a safe distance (the other side of the court).
Tezuka frowns at Inui, wondering if he should bother asking how he even knows.
"Ah, Tezuka," Oishi calls him, smiling but looking harried as Kaidoh and Momoshiro continue screaming in the background. "How's the cat you found yesterday?"
Thank you, Oishi. Tezuka inclines his head gratefully. "Still alive."
"YOU STUPID BIG GORILLA!" Kaidoh snarls, standing close enough that spit flies into Momo's face.
"OH YEAH?" Momo spits right back.
"YEAH!"
"A cat?" Fuji repeats, looking up at Tezuka with interest.
"Aa," Tezuka says.
"Did you find a home for it?" Oishi asks.
"Not yet, no." He pointedly looks at Fuji, Inui and Kikumaru, lifting his eyebrows.
They smile big plastic smiles back.
So that's how it is, then.
Inui clears his throat and scribbles something in his notebook. "Chances of Tezuka asking Kaidoh next… 92 %. But success rate is likely less than 0.02%."
"AT LEAST A GORILLA IS SMARTER THAN A STUPID SNAKE!"
Tezuka spares half of his frown in their direction before leveling the rest of it at Inui.
"Kaidoh's brother is allergic to cats," Inui adds hastily.
"IS NOT!"
"IS TOO!"
"NOT!"
"TOO!"
"Guys, guys, please!" Taka sighs. "Violence isn't the answer."
Oishi sighs. "I'll get the hose."
Tezuka frowns.
"What about Echizen?" Fuji suggests.
"I've already asked."
"That is troublesome," Fuji says. Utterly unhelpful.
I know, Tezuka thinks. I was three minutes late!
"TOO!"
"NOT!"
"TOO!"
"NOT!"
"NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT!"
"TOO TOO TOO TOO TOO TOO!"
"NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT-"
Tezuka screams: "50 LAPS!"
***
Oishi comes home with him after school. Just the two of them; Tezuka is faintly relieved that Eiji is unable to tag along because he had to rush home for some errand. It is raining again and Oishi does not have an umbrella with him. Tezuka reminds him not to let his guard down -especially considering it has done nothing but rain for two weeks now-, but holds his own out to the side so they can share.
"AH, Oishi-kun!" Tezuka mother chirrups as they pile into the genkan. "How nice to see you again! Staying for dinner?"
"Tezuka-san," Oishi returns, smiling warmly. "My mother will expect me home, I am sorry."
"Nonsense! I'll give her a ring to let her know you'll be staying. We're having clam soup," she smiles over her shoulder before disappearing into the living room.
Tezuka suspects his mother would love to adopt Oishi.
Upstairs Oishi coos over the kitten. It suckles busily at the tip of his pinkie while Tezuka prepares the milk replacer. Oishi gives her the bottle while Tezuka watches thoughtfully.
"Who's a good little girl?" Oishi sing-songs. "You are!" The kitten nestles in his hands and sucks hungrily.
Tezuka frowns a little. "I'll do it."
"Of course," Oishi agrees, and hands her over.
They sit in silence for a while. Clean and dry, the remaining daylight now shows the kitten to be a striped gray. She fits in the palm of Tezuka's hand as he cups it against her body to steady her.
"Ah, I picked something up for you at the pet store!" Oishi says, pulling the zipper of his backpack open and wrangling a rectangle-shaped something out of it. A litter tray. In pink. With white hearts on it. "She needs to learn how to pee properly. You can fill it with some clean sand or paper towels for now, I suppose," he shrugs and hands it to Tezuka.
He accepts it with his freehand, corralling the cat against the inside of his knee to keep her from toppling as she drinks enthusiastically. "I'm not keeping the cat," Tezuka replies, holding the tray at a distance, unsure of what to do with it.
"I know. I'm sorry I can't help you, Tezuka," Oishi says. "If it weren't for the fish I'd love to have her."
"Aa," Tezuka nods, setting the tray aside to deal with later. All this doesn't solve his problem, though.
The kitten empties the bottle and promptly rolls to her side in the cradle of Tezuka's legs. It starts to purr.
"You know," Oishi says, considering the cat. "I may know someone else who might take the cat."
"Oh?"
"Aa, it is someone who already has a pet, but I'm not sure what it is. A cat or a dog or a bunny. But he likes animals," Oishi reasons. "I'll give you his number."
***
"Moshi moshi?"
"Shishido?"
"…er, yeah?"
"This is Tezuka."
"… who?"
Tezuka sighs. Oishi makes a wry face. "Tezuka," he repeats, slowly.
"Tezuka."
"From Seigaku." Tezuka adds.
"I know that," Shishido mutters. "I think you have the wrong number." A pause. "Sir," he adds, sort of awkwardly.
"This is Shishido Ryou?"
"Yeah."
"From Hyotei?"
"Yeah."
"Then I have dialed the correct number." Tezuka says. Atobe's regulars seem a little dim-witted. Must be taxing to communicate with on a daily basis.
"Isn't it Atobe you're meaning to call?" Shishido says Atobe like people say: 'my grandmother's dirty panties'.
"…no," Tezuka says, thinking this ought to be obvious when the first thing he said was Shishido's name. He must offer Atobe his condolences. Suddenly those rumored migraines of his do not seem spur-of-the-moment dramas designed to make his fan base flutter and swoon with concern at him.
"Uhm," Shishido goes. "What do you want?" he asks carefully, as if he fears Tezuka may blackmail him for past crimes committed. Or recent. Likely tennis-related.
"Do you want a cat?"
"Excuse me?"
"A cat," Tezuka repeats. Then adds. "Meow. You know."
"I know what a cat is!" Shishido bursts out. "What am I gonna do with a cat? I got a dog."
"Ah," Tezuka says, frowning. 'Dog' he mouths at Oishi.
Oishi gives an apologetic shrug. The cat kneads Tezuka's thigh and purrs. It still has a milk mustache.
"My apologies," Tezuka says after a pause. "Oishi suspected it might be a cat."
"Che," Shishido goes. "Choutarou's the one with the cat."
"I see," Tezuka says. "Thank you."
"WAIT-" Shishido starts.
Tezuka hangs up.
***
Through Kikumaru they acquire Ohtori's number. Oishi stays chatting on the phone with his doubles partner as though they haven't seen each other in centuries. He wonders what those two still have to talk about after a day of being attached at the hip. To give them privacy, Tezuka wanders into the hallway with the kitten riding on his shoulder, sharp claws clutching at his shirt.
He punches in Ohtori's number. Within seconds it is picked up.
"Tezuka?" Shishido says.
Tezuka blinks a slow blink. "Yes?"
"Why did you hang up? Choutarou was sitting right next to me," Shishido scoffs. "Waste of time."
In the background, Tezuka can hear someone else exclaiming: "Give me my phone Shishido-san!"
"Ah," Tezuka goes, momentarily at loss for words. "So. Does Ohtori want a cat?"
"D'you want another cat, Choutarou?" Shishido asks, a grin in his voice.
Ohtori is sitting close enough that Tezuka can clearly hear him answer: "My cat is allergic to cats."
"What?" Tezuka says, despite himself.
There's a pause. "That's fucked up Choutarou," Shishido says.
"She has special NEEDS!" Ohtori says gravely.
"I'll bet," Shishido mutters. Then adds to Tezuka, "I am sorry, Tezuka-san." Perfectly polite as-you-may all of a sudden.
Tezuka blinks again. Shishido is weird.
"Atobe's got loads of animals though," he continues. "Elephants. Penguins. I bet he can handle another kitten."
"I suppose," Tezuka concedes. He'd rather been hoping he could've avoided asking Atobe. "Sorry for the trouble," he adds.
"No problem," Shishido answers.
Tezuka hangs up.
In his room Oishi squeals: "EIJI!" Then he giggles.
Lifting a hand to absently scratch the kitten on her head, Tezuka considers that despite their differences, he and Atobe may just be in the same boat, after all.
***
After Oishi has gone home, Tezuka sits at his desk and revises today's classes and subjects, completes the homework and goes through a stack of Science III notes for the exams. After dealing with Atobe's Doubles One pair, he really doesn't feel up to contacting Atobe himself, too. Plus, for someone like Atobe he'd better plan a whole uninterrupted evening. He's tiresome like that.
It's rather late, but Tezuka decides to read one chapter in his novel regardless. He takes the book and the kitten into bed with him, props himself up with some pillows.
Outside it still rains, the pattering against the window panes is soothing. He wants to concentrate on his book, but all he can think about is how someone simply dumped a box of kittens in a rat-infested alley with no regards for their safety. He can only hope that the other kittens were taken away by well-intended people and have found good homes. Terrible to think that they did not care about this one last kitten and left her behind in such a downpour. Against his side the kitten lies curled up like a little knot, too small, too scrawny. Tezuka rests his palm on her body.
He'll do his very best to find her a good home.
***
"Found anybody who will take it yet?" his father asks.
"No," Tezuka says, shaking his head. He's feeding her the bottle at breakfast. "But I am pretty confident that an… acquaintance of mine will take her."
"Really?"
"Aa."
"Well then, that's positive news, no?" his father says rather pointedly before disappearing back behind his newspaper.
Tezuka blinks. He supposes it is. The kitten suckles hungrily, tucked away protectively in the crook of his arm.
***
The gates swing wide. An enormous mansion looms in the distance.
"Welcome to my humble abode, Tezuka." Atobe announces, mouth curling.
The limo rolls smoothly up the drive, passing a pond where a flock of flamingos pick their way though the water. He's not quite sure how he ended up sitting in this sleek black vehicle with Kabaji next to him and Atobe lounging artfully across from them. One moment he was simply calling him to ask about the kitten and the next Atobe insisted on showing him that he has the very best accommodations available for any sort animal and Tezuka simply must come and see for himself.
Peafowls strut over the immaculately tended lawn. They sit on hedges trimmed into shapes of unicorns and giant tennis balls. They nest in flowerbeds teeming with blooms in all possible colors. Suddenly a roar echoes over the grounds and they flutter their wings in distress.
"They must be feeding the Siberian tigers," Atobe remarks with studied casualness. "We have agreed to aid in the breeding program - a fairly important undertaking, seeing as these magnificent creatures are endangered."
"Aa," Tezuka says. He doesn't quite know what else to do but nod occasionally. All he wants to know is whether Atobe will take the kitten and raise it with love, patience and wisdom. Siberian Tigers have no matter in that. He hopes.
The car pulls to a stop right before a broad set of marble steps leading up to the mansion. A butler opens the door. Tezuka feels monumentally awkward and slightly annoyed. He can open the door of the car perfectly fine himself. Atobe leads them inside, gleaming shoes crunching on the shining white gravel. Kabaji trails a pace behind Tezuka on the left, as though he suspects him for attempting to make a break for it. Tezuka's almost tempted. He much more prefers either of their company on the other side of the net on a tennis court. He knows precisely what to do then. But this is rather beyond him.
"Would you care for some mimosa, Tezuka?" Atobe ask him.
When one is Tezuka Kunimitsu, one does not say 'umm'. But it is pretty close right then. Instead he just blinks in a way he hopes to be enquiring.
"It's virgin."
He has absolutely no idea what Atobe is babbling about, though he would not be surprised he has a harem of willing girls at his beck and call stowed away somewhere. "No, thank you," he says eventually. "Sorry for the trouble."
"My mother and father are still entangled in some debate with a few of our business associates," Atobe continues on smoothly, flipping his hair aside. "My apologies."
Though he simply inclines his head, Tezuka knows only relief. As if one Atobe is not bad enough. Perish the thought of dealing with three of them.
"Shall I show you the killer whales, perhaps?" Atobe asks him, smiling.
Tezuka sincerely hopes that the whales won't have anything to do with cats, rather like the tigers. But he is a guest and thus he shall strive to be perfectly polite and courteous, so he follows. They are led through sumptuous hallways. Vases of roses teeter on what seems to be any available surface at hand. Intricate frescos dazzle him when he looks up. Marble floors gleam. Paintings hang at perfect intervals, portraying men and women with Atobe's hair and eyes, the proud tilt of his chin. They pass through what seems to be a vast ballroom, an incredible dining room flaunting a table that must be able to seat over fifty people and an indoor swimming pool complete with several slides and three jacuzzis.
Tezuka suspects Atobe is not quite taking the most straightforward route.
At long last they arrive at the basin. Three orcas, each about the size of a bus, weave through the water with surprising grace. At a gesture of Atobe one of them swims up to the glass pane and regards them with keen intelligence.
Atobe looks at him expectantly.
Tezuka stares back. "I suppose you keep your cats elsewhere?" he ventures after a while.
"Of course," Atobe tsks. But he deflates some. "Come along then."
This time it only takes two hallways and a staircase. Tezuka can hear the cats before he sees them. At a snap of Atobe's fingers, Kabaji opens a door.
Cats.
Everywhere.
More than Tezuka ever imagined there were.
All sizes and colors and sorts. Cat condos, scratching posts, climbing jungles and cat beds. Skeins of wool, wind-up mouses and wall dancers. Gleaming bowls of food, sparkling saucers of water. Pristine litter boxes.
Tezuka can only stare. No doubt this must be a paradise for cats. A herd of cats stampede towards Kabaji and clamber all over him. The purring is deafening. Kabaji stands stoic, big shovel-sized hands delicately petting, his feet covered in a rolling furry blanket of adoring felines. Their fur shines sleek and bright with health.
Atobe seems pleased with his reaction and steps inside to pluck up a specimen bearing striking likeness to Echizen's cat. "Any questions you have you may ask Mikael, he'll answer them."
"Pleased to be of assistance," Mikael says, bowing to him.
"Aa," Tezuka agrees, wondering whether Atobe keeps butlers folded away in corners for when he has need of them. Like those virgins.
Mikael has an open, friendly face when he directs himself at Tezuka to ask: "What sort of cat will be joining us? A California Spangled? Kurilian Bobtail? Or a Minskin perhaps?"
"I am not sure," Tezuka hazards. A pause. He thinks for a moment. "She has stripes," he adds thoughtfully.
"Ah." The butler says, blinking. "No matter, they are all welcome. Even those of… ah, less fortunate lineages."
"Good," Tezuka says, pleased. "She is still very small and needs to be bottle-fed. I assume Atobe knows how to-"
"Bo-chama?" Mikael splutters, seemingly shocked that Tezuka dare suggest such a thing. "No, of course not. Though he would undoubtedly be skilled at it, taking care of Bo-chama's pets is part of our job."
"… I see," Tezuka says. "So he does not…" he wonders how to express 'love' or 'cuddle' without sounding profoundly foolish.
Thankfully, Mikael seems to know what he is attempting to convey. "Bo-chama makes an effort to distribute his presence equally amongst all his pets. Usually he takes a greater hand in the care of the hounds and horses."
"Hm," Tezuka purses his lips.
Mikael seems flustered. "It is simply impossible for Bo-chama to spend time with every single one of the animals every day. They adore him regardless, even those on the island."
"The… the island?" Tezuka repeats, shocked.
"Hai," the butler smiles at him, interpreting Tezuka's blank look for one of profound awe. "For the animals that do not fit on the premises. He flies out to visit them once a month."
"Right." Tezuka says.
Atobe must have seen some of his concern in Tezuka's eyes, because he walks up to him with all presences dropped. "Tezuka?"
"This…" Tezuka frowns, uncomfortable that he must turn Atobe's offer down. "While I have no doubt that these cats are well taken care for and content, I would prefer to find someplace more… of a home."
Atobe opens his mouth to protest, then closes it. "I would not mind keeping her in my room," he hazards after a while.
"Bo-chama already has so many responsibilities!" Mikael protests. "I would be honored to-"
"Sorry for the trouble," Tezuka delicately interrupts him. "But I will look elsewhere. You are very generous, Atobe."
Atobe looks rather pinched, as though he's failed a very important test. But he nods, slowly. "I understand."
What an uncomfortable situation. Both Mikael and Kabaji stare at Tezuka as though he is a heartless wretch for making Atobe doubt his prowess at caring for animals. And it is not that Tezuka even doubts him, or questions the contentment of any creature he owns. But he intends to find the cat a home where there's someone who smiles at her first thing in the morning and bids her a goodnight every evening. Someone devoted to her with their whole heart and soul.
After having been left to die in the rain, that is the very least she deserves.
Tezuka doesn't know how to explain this. So he offers the very best next alternative. "We could play a game of tennis?"
After a stifled moment, Atobe smiles a smile as sharp as a razor.
***
The sun is setting when they are forced to decide on a draw.
Neither of them would have, but a butler looking mighty like Mikael had come trotting up to them to inform Atobe that his father required him inside. And it seems that Atobe's father will is law, because Atobe did not even attempt to put up a protest, even though he is clearly reluctant.
"Tezuka," he says between heavy breaths as he pats at his face with a snowy white towel. "My driver will take you home."
"That won't be-"
"Yes, it will be," Atobe cuts over him. "I am giving you a little something for your… ah, kitten. And I won't take no for an answer," he hurriedly adds as Tezuka opens his mouth.
Tezuka closes it to produce a proper frown before saying: "I am not keeping the cat, Atobe."
"Ahn?" Atobe goes, muffled, with his back turned to Tezuka. "Well, then I suppose you can give it to whomever will become her new owner."
The little something turns out to be what seems a lifetime supply of luxury cat food. Tezuka has no choice but to stack the cans in his room. They line a whole wall and then some, like a bad parody of new wallpaper. There's also a sea of cans lined up like soldiers under his bed and yet more cans under his desk, stacked so far out Tezuka now has to sit with his knees drawn up on his chair if he does homework.
Wonderful.
***
That night Tezuka lies curled on his side in bed, watching the fuzzy bump of the kitten's body as she sleeps. Carefully, with the tip of his finger, he strokes along her spine. She's soft.
Surely there must be someone who would take her and love her like she's supposed to be. It is impossible not to adore something so tiny and fluffy. She's positively… cute. Tezuka's train of thought grinds to a stop. Cute. Girls like cute things, don't they? How can this not have occurred to him before?
"I think I know someone else who might like you, Cat." Tezuka whispers to her under his breath.
In her sleep, she sighs and tips her head into his palm.
***
Miyuki picks up almost as soon as the dial tone engages. "THIEF-BRO!" she shrieks through the phone.
Tezuka winces. In his lap, the kitten arches her back and hisses. Sort of. It rather sounds as though she sneezes. The outburst actually propels her backwards and she lands in a confused heap between a pile of books and tennis balls.
"Miyuki," Tezuka acknowledges.
"It's been so LONG!" Miyuki tells him. "Why didn't ya call me sooner?"
Scooping Cat up Tezuka drops her in the cradle of his legs again. He'd rather have her not wandering off. Before school this morning she'd crawled under his bookcase and had refused to come out. Tezuka had been five minutes late this time, arriving with dustbunnies still clinging to his hair. Inui had felt it necessary to comment that his Hairy Little Problem was distracting him. He's not distracted! But he can't hardly let her stay and starve under the bookcase either.
Meanwhile Miyuki is going on a mile a minute. About school, about tennis, about her brother, about how Tezuka just disappeared and how is his shoulder?
He tells her it is fine.
"We should play again, Racket Thief-bro," she says suddenly, a little too fast, a little too flippant.
Tezuka blinks. He's not sure if he should tell her that it is a long way to go for one single leisure match. There's an awkward silence as Tezuka fails to provide a proper response.
"That's… that's not why you were calling, huh?" Miyuki mumbles at last.
"Aa," Tezuka manages, realizing he didn't do something he was supposed to do but not quite sure what it even is. "Would you like a cat?" he asks instead, hoping to cheer her.
"… a cat?" Miyuki echoes, sounding monumentally unimpressed.
"A cat. Meow."
"I know what a cat is!" she snaps.
It's like Shishido all over again. Tezuka pinches the bridge of his nose.
Miyuki sucks in a breath and continues in a calmer tone: "What would I want with a cat?"
"Keep it as a pet?' Tezuka hazards.
"Tcha." Miyuki sighs. "I don't really like cats."
Impossible.
"But…" Tezuka looks at Cat. "She's small and cute and fluffy?"
"So what?" Miyuki asks him. "Not all girls like that sorta stuff, Thief Bro."
"Oh," Tezuka goes, confused. "I am sorry for the trouble."
"No big," Miyuki answers.
Running the backs of his knuckles along her tiny body, Tezuka silently apologizes to Cat. Another dead end.
On the other end of the phone Miyuki whispers softly: "Guess I'll see you around then?" and then a small hopeful "Sometime?" follows it up.
"Of course," Tezuka answers, smiling a little. "Bye-"
"Thief-bro."
"Yes?"
"You sound like you'd rather keep the stupid cat yourself. Silly."
She hangs up.
Tezuka stares in disbelief at his mobile phone.
…on to part two!
Comment on part two, please.
Recipient's Name: Everybody from the funpotexchange
Author: Everlind
Rating: PG
Wordcount: 11 400
Pairing/Characters: Tezuka. Cameos from various other characters.
Warnings: Crack, Tezuka-style. Sort of. Kittens. Fuji. Kite being purple. Gouya. Oh, and killer whales.
Summary: Tezuka rescues a cat.
Disclaimer: The Prince of Tennis belongs to Konomi Takeshi. This story is based on characters and the universe of The Prince of Tennis, no money is being made from it.
Author's Notes: My recipient was 'the community' (funpotexchange). So I decided not to roll about in Silver Pair like a dog in its own pee and come up with something everybody might enjoy. This happened. Uhm. I'm sorry?
Thanks go to S. and M. for sparking this idea.
This story would not have happened, nor be what it is without the help of my amazing beta neooldetokyo. I am the luckiest bastard alive. Thank you.
Tezuka's Hairy Little Problem
Cold, fat drops of rain begin to splatter down as he walks back home. They leave coin-sized marks on the pavement where they fall. One plummets down the neck of his collar, raising goosebumps. Tezuka never lets his guard down; he's left the house prepared. A young woman in a business attire hurries along the sidewalk, briefcase over her head. Tezuka steps aside to let her pass and then opens up his umbrella.
The rain clatters on the clear plastic before streaking down like errant tears. Tezuka shifts his bags and thinks about his homework. There's is quite a lot of it, the exams are looming closer. After bath and dinner he might not have time to read that new book he recently purchased, or to watch his program. No matter. His grades are more important.
I won't get careless! Tezuka tells himself. He'll not allow anything to distract him.
It starts raining harder. His feet swim in his shoes and everything from mid-thigh down is soaked. Tezuka thinks about his bath again, about which bath salts he might use. It's cold. His exhales fog his glasses in steady bursts. No use in wiping them off.
Something squeaks.
Tezuka stops walking.
Something squeaks again, high and plaintive.
He cranes his head left and right, squinting against the haze covering his glasses. It comes out of an alleyway. There, on the ground near some garbage cans, is a soggy cardboard box. A puddle flows around it, oily rainbows warping across the surface.
Cautiously approaching it, Tezuka peers inside. A small something makes feeble paddling movements in the inch of water that has collected at the bottom. A paper is taped to the side, announcing:
FREE KITTENS.
It hardly looks like cat. Still, Tezuka can't stand by and let this happen. So he takes the towel he used for tennis practice, fishes for the flailing cat and wraps it carefully up. It's pathetically tiny. Its pink mouth opens wide on a mewl. It shivers.
And then Tezuka stands there with a kitten in his hands, quite at loss of what to do with it.
So he takes it home.
***
"I don't know, Kunimitsu," his mother says, eyeing the kitten skeptically. "Perhaps you could take it to the shelter?"
"Aa," Tezuka says. The kitten squirms around feebly within the folds of the towel. The once white terrycloth is gray where the fur touches.
"But I think they'll be closed by now," she adds.
"Hn," Tezuka nods. That is unfortunate.
"Poor thing. I'll get a box."
"Thank you," Tezuka says. He'd rather wished she'd take it off his hands so he could take a bath. The cat smells. He's cold. His socks are wet. He's got homework. But he always finishes what he starts.
His father lowers the newspaper and looks at his son. His glasses hang from the end of his nose. "Why don't you ask any of your friends whether they want a kitten?"
A good plan, why did he not think of that himself? He could have gone to Oishi's, or Inui's first and ask, before taking it along home. Perhaps not Inui, Tezuka reconsiders. Momoshiro had to spent the whole of afternoon practice on the toilet with cramps. Again. Who knows what he'd feed a cat.
His mother arrives with an old box that once held their microwave. It is padded with clean, but old towels. Tezuka puts the kitten inside. It sort of squats in the middle of the box, squeaking. Its tail is curled up around a hind leg.
He'll call Oishi first.
***
"Tezuka!" Oishi greets him, sounding pleasantly surprised.
"Oishi," Tezuka says. "Do you want a cat?"
"I, ah? What?"
"A cat."
"A…. cat?"
"I found one," Tezuka says. He's sitting cross-legged on a towel in his room. He's taken off his soaked pants and socks so he would not track puddles on the floor, but nothing else. He needs to take care of the cat first. The box sits against the end of his bed. Occasionally a querulous mewl comes from it.
"What do you mean?"
Tezuka tells him about the box in the alley, the rain.
"Oh, is it alright?" Oishi asks immediately after, sounding distraught. "Is it injured? Have you checked?"
Tezuka looks at the box and realizes that there may be more to this than simply rescuing the cat.
Oishi seems to realize as much. "Check whether it is bleeding anywhere and if it can walk alright."
Nudging the kitten produces another squeak. There's no blood. It crawls along on its belly when prodded. "Seems to be," Tezuka says.
"Make sure it is not undercooled from being in the cold rain so long. Oh! And try to feed it! If it is a baby you may have to give it a bottle. And make sure it doesn't have fleas."
Fleas?
Tezuka withdraws his hand. "Aa," he says. The kitten looks rumpled and sad. "So, will you take it?" Tezuka asks again.
"Oh, I am sorry, Tezuka," Oishi apologizes. "I have fish. And cats and fish… well. You get the picture."
He does.
"I see," he answers.
"Why don't you ask Echizen?" Oishi suggests instead. "He's got Karupin, doesn't he? Maybe a friend for his cat?"
A good idea, Tezuka concedes. Why didn't he think of that himself?
"Thank you," Tezuka says, and hangs up.
***
With his index finger already hovering above the buttons on his phone Tezuka realizes that he has no idea what Echizen's mobile phone number is. So, ever organized, he checks the register for the tennis club and comes up with his house number instead.
He dials it and waits. The kitten mews plaintively.
Someone picks up. "Yes?"
Tezuka does a slow blink.
"This is Tezuka Kunimitsu speaking," Tezuka says. "Might I speak to Echizen?"
"Eh?" the other person says. "Mitsi? Are you Ryoma's giiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-rlfriend?"
"Excuse me?" Tezuka exclaims.
No answer, instead the man on the phone can be heard yelling: "Ryoma! It's your girlfriend on the phone! Issit the one with the cute hair? She's got a really low voice, though."
Some mumbling and bumbling about. They appear to be wrestling. His father (or one of Echizen's rude uncles, he rather hopes) asks Ryoma about third base. Tezuka wonders what sports has anything to do with it.
Eventually Echizen seems to succeed in liberating the phone. He sounds slightly breathless and not so slightly annoyed. "Who is this?" he asks.
"Tezuka," Tezuka answers.
"…buchou?"
"Aa."
"Why are you calling?" Echizen asks, sounding vaguely perplexed. "Is it about tennis?"
"No."
"Oh," Echizen goes, sounding more like his usual self. Bored with the universe at large.
"Do you want a cat?" Tezuka asks.
"A cat?" Echizen repeats, sounding confused again.
Tezuka frowns. Why does this seem so hard for everybody to understand? His mother hollers a floor down about dinner. Tezuka's stomach rumbles in answer. Echizen breathes down the line, waiting.
"Aa," he answers.
"I have a cat," Echizen tells him.
"Maybe your cat wants a friend?" Tezuka suggests.
"No," Echizen answers. "Karupin doesn't like other cats."
"I see," Tezuka says, pursing his lips.
His mother yells once more about dinner. The cardboard box in his room sways as something thuds against the side. The kitten cries. It is probably as hungry as Tezuka is. A second thump and the box teeters over. The cat rolls out.
"Ask Kaidoh-senpai," Echizen offers, sounding distracted already. "He likes cats, but doesn't have one."
"Thank you," Tezuka tells him.
They both hang up.
Meanwhile the kitten has tottered over to Tezuka and his pressing its clammy, cold and likely flea-infested body up against Tezuka's leg. For warmth. Tezuka checks the time. It is late. Too late to disturb Kaidoh. And the cat needs looking after first.
"Seems like you will be staying the night," Tezuka remarks with a sigh.
***
They try cold fish. They try slivers of meat. They try bread soaked in milk.
The kitten refuses everything. Instead it cries and cries and cries. With lukewarm water they manage to get it cleaned up some. There's no fleas. Small mercies.
Tezuka's dinner gets cold. He still hasn't bathed. He still has homework. Eventually his parents wander off towards the living room, leaving Tezuka to try and tempt the kitten into eating and drinking. His grandfather shuffles in about an hour later. He purses his lips down at him.
"Is that cow’s milk?" he asks, indicting the broth.
Tezuka nods.
"Careless!" his grandfather shouts, causing both Tezuka and the cat to jump in surprise. Milk and soggy bread splatters everywhere. "It could give it diarrhea!"
Even though the kitten isn't interested, Tezuka pushes the bowl away instantly.
"I'll take you to the veterinarian," his grandfather says.
***
The veterinarian gives Tezuka milk replacers, in a ready-mix liquid formula, as well as suitable soap to wash it with.
"It's a very young kitten," she tells him. "You'll have to bottle-feed it regularly and take good care of it. It is lucky she's relatively healthy. Make sure to hold her close so she'll stay warm, and put heating pads in her box for the night. She just peed, so she can do that alone, but make sure she has a clean place to relieve herself."
Relieve herself? Pee? Bottle-feed?
But what about his dinner? His bath? His homework? Tennis?!
"Can't you keep it?" Tezuka asks.
"Her," the veterinarian corrects him. "And no." she puts the kitten back in his hands.
Tezuka pays with the money he'd been saving up for a limited edition book set he's had his eye on for a while. There's an additional fee for the after-office-hours service. All of his allowance disappears in a fat wallet that does not belong to him. The kitten burrows into the neck of his sweater, tiny claws sharp as needles. Her chilly nose smudges along his jaw.
It is still perching there when Tezuka tries to chew through his stale, rubbery dinner. It took him over an hour to bottle feed it, milk spilling everywhere. On his glasses, on all the rest of him, on the cat, on the table, on the floor. Somehow even on the ceiling. Another cause for his grandfather to call him careless. He won't let it happen again! A thorough washing had been in order, so Tezuka had bathed her carefully. Only then himself.
It is late. Past his usual bedtime. He still has homework.
His eyes droop a little.
The kitten wriggles in his neck. Then pees, a warm liquid squirt aimed straight down his spine.
"Careless!" his grandfather says, shaking his head.
His mother remarks how wasteful it is to run a second bath. Tezuka nods, apologizes and then thanks her. While he washes himself a second a time, the kitten flounders about in the folds of his discarded clothing.
Tezuka knows he could only have done the right thing. But he'll be glad when the kitten goes to Kaidoh tomorrow.
He scrubs his neck and back and shoulders with the loofah until his skin peels off.
***
Throughout the night, the kitten wakes Tezuka with its piteous calls. Thrice he attempts to feed it. Only once it is actually hungry. His alarm goes off at three so he can re-heat the pads to keep her from getting cold. She mewls on regardless, until, at four, Tezuka takes her into bed with him. She stops meowing, but now Tezuka doesn't dare close his eyes lest he dozes off and rolls onto her in his sleep. At five-thirty his alarm goes off again. Tezuka yawns over his breakfast, through his stretches and during his weight training.
His grandfather eyes him disapprovingly. His mother tuts and fusses.
It is necessary to feed the kitten again instead of following the English lessons on the radio as he usually does. His mother reluctantly agrees to feed her during the day, taking in the smear of milk on his cheek and the scratches on his forearms.
Of course, all the fussing with the bottle and the mess that needs to cleaned up after makes Tezuka late for practice. Three whole minutes.
For the first time in his life.
Careless! he tells himself. He won't let his guard down ever again. And yet, all he can think about is the kitten, worrying his mother will forget to re-heat the heating pads, or that she'll be unable to get her to drink. What if she escapes from his room and someone steps on her? What if Chu-sama (Tezuka's old teddy bear) isn't enough to keep her company?
As if that isn't enough Momoshiro and Kaidoh are on the courts face-to-face, fighting.
"OH YEAH?"
"YEAH!"
"SHUT UP, YOU IDIOT!"
"NO, YOU SHUT UP MAMUSHI!"
Tezuka hurriedly changes into his uniform and steps out on the courts, calculating the appropriate amount of laps all the while. Nobody is playing any tennis. He may make all of them run extra for this.
"My, my," Fuji says, shaking his head and sounding disapproving. Notably, he is not doing anything at all to prevent the scene. Tezuka frowns at him and clears his throat to assign enough laps to the both of them that they'll still be out of breath by this afternoon's practice. And that might just mean they'll not have enough left to pick fights with one another.
"Saa, Tezuka," Fuji says.
Tezuka blinks and looks down at him.
"You are late."
So he is. "My apologies," Tezuka says. "I was… held up."
"YOU SMELL, MAMUSHI!"
"WHAT KIND OF INSULT IS THAT, IDIOT?"
"Aah, guys, please-" Taka tries to pry them apart gingerly.
"What is the problem this time?" Tezuka asks Fuji.
"YOU SMELL LIKE FEET!" Momoshiro yells, helpfully.
"YOU SMELL LIKE BUTT!" Kaidoh retorts.
"No idea," Fuji replies, smiling.
"GET YOUR UGLY FACE AWAY FROM ME, YOU IDIOT!"
Tezuka notes that Kaidoh appears to be foaming at the mouth. Perhaps he'll pass out before long and they can continue practice in an orderly, disciplined fashion. Hosing them always creates enough of a mess that they'll need the rest of the morning to mop it all up. And Tezuka intends to be playing tennis (while Kaidoh and Momoshiro run laps until the soles of their trainers catch fire). He opens his mouth to yell.
"Chances of Tezuka being late… 0,01%," Inui says, looming up besides them out of nowhere. "I may need to recalculate that now, considering your, ah, hairy little problem."
"Tezuka has a hairy little problem?" Eiji repeats loudly, wrinkling his nose and dropping a pointed glance where apparently he suspects this issue to be situated. Fuji copies the gesture, but does not seem as dismayed as Kikumaru is at the prospect. Intrigued more like.
"I-" Tezuka begins to say, inching away.
"Tezuka encountered a felis silvestris catus last evening," Inui explains.
Kikumaru yelps, somersaulting away in a flash. "Is that contagious?" he queries from a what he judges to be a safe distance (the other side of the court).
Tezuka frowns at Inui, wondering if he should bother asking how he even knows.
"Ah, Tezuka," Oishi calls him, smiling but looking harried as Kaidoh and Momoshiro continue screaming in the background. "How's the cat you found yesterday?"
Thank you, Oishi. Tezuka inclines his head gratefully. "Still alive."
"YOU STUPID BIG GORILLA!" Kaidoh snarls, standing close enough that spit flies into Momo's face.
"OH YEAH?" Momo spits right back.
"YEAH!"
"A cat?" Fuji repeats, looking up at Tezuka with interest.
"Aa," Tezuka says.
"Did you find a home for it?" Oishi asks.
"Not yet, no." He pointedly looks at Fuji, Inui and Kikumaru, lifting his eyebrows.
They smile big plastic smiles back.
So that's how it is, then.
Inui clears his throat and scribbles something in his notebook. "Chances of Tezuka asking Kaidoh next… 92 %. But success rate is likely less than 0.02%."
"AT LEAST A GORILLA IS SMARTER THAN A STUPID SNAKE!"
Tezuka spares half of his frown in their direction before leveling the rest of it at Inui.
"Kaidoh's brother is allergic to cats," Inui adds hastily.
"IS NOT!"
"IS TOO!"
"NOT!"
"TOO!"
"Guys, guys, please!" Taka sighs. "Violence isn't the answer."
Oishi sighs. "I'll get the hose."
Tezuka frowns.
"What about Echizen?" Fuji suggests.
"I've already asked."
"That is troublesome," Fuji says. Utterly unhelpful.
I know, Tezuka thinks. I was three minutes late!
"TOO!"
"NOT!"
"TOO!"
"NOT!"
"NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT!"
"TOO TOO TOO TOO TOO TOO!"
"NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT-"
Tezuka screams: "50 LAPS!"
***
Oishi comes home with him after school. Just the two of them; Tezuka is faintly relieved that Eiji is unable to tag along because he had to rush home for some errand. It is raining again and Oishi does not have an umbrella with him. Tezuka reminds him not to let his guard down -especially considering it has done nothing but rain for two weeks now-, but holds his own out to the side so they can share.
"AH, Oishi-kun!" Tezuka mother chirrups as they pile into the genkan. "How nice to see you again! Staying for dinner?"
"Tezuka-san," Oishi returns, smiling warmly. "My mother will expect me home, I am sorry."
"Nonsense! I'll give her a ring to let her know you'll be staying. We're having clam soup," she smiles over her shoulder before disappearing into the living room.
Tezuka suspects his mother would love to adopt Oishi.
Upstairs Oishi coos over the kitten. It suckles busily at the tip of his pinkie while Tezuka prepares the milk replacer. Oishi gives her the bottle while Tezuka watches thoughtfully.
"Who's a good little girl?" Oishi sing-songs. "You are!" The kitten nestles in his hands and sucks hungrily.
Tezuka frowns a little. "I'll do it."
"Of course," Oishi agrees, and hands her over.
They sit in silence for a while. Clean and dry, the remaining daylight now shows the kitten to be a striped gray. She fits in the palm of Tezuka's hand as he cups it against her body to steady her.
"Ah, I picked something up for you at the pet store!" Oishi says, pulling the zipper of his backpack open and wrangling a rectangle-shaped something out of it. A litter tray. In pink. With white hearts on it. "She needs to learn how to pee properly. You can fill it with some clean sand or paper towels for now, I suppose," he shrugs and hands it to Tezuka.
He accepts it with his freehand, corralling the cat against the inside of his knee to keep her from toppling as she drinks enthusiastically. "I'm not keeping the cat," Tezuka replies, holding the tray at a distance, unsure of what to do with it.
"I know. I'm sorry I can't help you, Tezuka," Oishi says. "If it weren't for the fish I'd love to have her."
"Aa," Tezuka nods, setting the tray aside to deal with later. All this doesn't solve his problem, though.
The kitten empties the bottle and promptly rolls to her side in the cradle of Tezuka's legs. It starts to purr.
"You know," Oishi says, considering the cat. "I may know someone else who might take the cat."
"Oh?"
"Aa, it is someone who already has a pet, but I'm not sure what it is. A cat or a dog or a bunny. But he likes animals," Oishi reasons. "I'll give you his number."
***
"Moshi moshi?"
"Shishido?"
"…er, yeah?"
"This is Tezuka."
"… who?"
Tezuka sighs. Oishi makes a wry face. "Tezuka," he repeats, slowly.
"Tezuka."
"From Seigaku." Tezuka adds.
"I know that," Shishido mutters. "I think you have the wrong number." A pause. "Sir," he adds, sort of awkwardly.
"This is Shishido Ryou?"
"Yeah."
"From Hyotei?"
"Yeah."
"Then I have dialed the correct number." Tezuka says. Atobe's regulars seem a little dim-witted. Must be taxing to communicate with on a daily basis.
"Isn't it Atobe you're meaning to call?" Shishido says Atobe like people say: 'my grandmother's dirty panties'.
"…no," Tezuka says, thinking this ought to be obvious when the first thing he said was Shishido's name. He must offer Atobe his condolences. Suddenly those rumored migraines of his do not seem spur-of-the-moment dramas designed to make his fan base flutter and swoon with concern at him.
"Uhm," Shishido goes. "What do you want?" he asks carefully, as if he fears Tezuka may blackmail him for past crimes committed. Or recent. Likely tennis-related.
"Do you want a cat?"
"Excuse me?"
"A cat," Tezuka repeats. Then adds. "Meow. You know."
"I know what a cat is!" Shishido bursts out. "What am I gonna do with a cat? I got a dog."
"Ah," Tezuka says, frowning. 'Dog' he mouths at Oishi.
Oishi gives an apologetic shrug. The cat kneads Tezuka's thigh and purrs. It still has a milk mustache.
"My apologies," Tezuka says after a pause. "Oishi suspected it might be a cat."
"Che," Shishido goes. "Choutarou's the one with the cat."
"I see," Tezuka says. "Thank you."
"WAIT-" Shishido starts.
Tezuka hangs up.
***
Through Kikumaru they acquire Ohtori's number. Oishi stays chatting on the phone with his doubles partner as though they haven't seen each other in centuries. He wonders what those two still have to talk about after a day of being attached at the hip. To give them privacy, Tezuka wanders into the hallway with the kitten riding on his shoulder, sharp claws clutching at his shirt.
He punches in Ohtori's number. Within seconds it is picked up.
"Tezuka?" Shishido says.
Tezuka blinks a slow blink. "Yes?"
"Why did you hang up? Choutarou was sitting right next to me," Shishido scoffs. "Waste of time."
In the background, Tezuka can hear someone else exclaiming: "Give me my phone Shishido-san!"
"Ah," Tezuka goes, momentarily at loss for words. "So. Does Ohtori want a cat?"
"D'you want another cat, Choutarou?" Shishido asks, a grin in his voice.
Ohtori is sitting close enough that Tezuka can clearly hear him answer: "My cat is allergic to cats."
"What?" Tezuka says, despite himself.
There's a pause. "That's fucked up Choutarou," Shishido says.
"She has special NEEDS!" Ohtori says gravely.
"I'll bet," Shishido mutters. Then adds to Tezuka, "I am sorry, Tezuka-san." Perfectly polite as-you-may all of a sudden.
Tezuka blinks again. Shishido is weird.
"Atobe's got loads of animals though," he continues. "Elephants. Penguins. I bet he can handle another kitten."
"I suppose," Tezuka concedes. He'd rather been hoping he could've avoided asking Atobe. "Sorry for the trouble," he adds.
"No problem," Shishido answers.
Tezuka hangs up.
In his room Oishi squeals: "EIJI!" Then he giggles.
Lifting a hand to absently scratch the kitten on her head, Tezuka considers that despite their differences, he and Atobe may just be in the same boat, after all.
***
After Oishi has gone home, Tezuka sits at his desk and revises today's classes and subjects, completes the homework and goes through a stack of Science III notes for the exams. After dealing with Atobe's Doubles One pair, he really doesn't feel up to contacting Atobe himself, too. Plus, for someone like Atobe he'd better plan a whole uninterrupted evening. He's tiresome like that.
It's rather late, but Tezuka decides to read one chapter in his novel regardless. He takes the book and the kitten into bed with him, props himself up with some pillows.
Outside it still rains, the pattering against the window panes is soothing. He wants to concentrate on his book, but all he can think about is how someone simply dumped a box of kittens in a rat-infested alley with no regards for their safety. He can only hope that the other kittens were taken away by well-intended people and have found good homes. Terrible to think that they did not care about this one last kitten and left her behind in such a downpour. Against his side the kitten lies curled up like a little knot, too small, too scrawny. Tezuka rests his palm on her body.
He'll do his very best to find her a good home.
***
"Found anybody who will take it yet?" his father asks.
"No," Tezuka says, shaking his head. He's feeding her the bottle at breakfast. "But I am pretty confident that an… acquaintance of mine will take her."
"Really?"
"Aa."
"Well then, that's positive news, no?" his father says rather pointedly before disappearing back behind his newspaper.
Tezuka blinks. He supposes it is. The kitten suckles hungrily, tucked away protectively in the crook of his arm.
***
The gates swing wide. An enormous mansion looms in the distance.
"Welcome to my humble abode, Tezuka." Atobe announces, mouth curling.
The limo rolls smoothly up the drive, passing a pond where a flock of flamingos pick their way though the water. He's not quite sure how he ended up sitting in this sleek black vehicle with Kabaji next to him and Atobe lounging artfully across from them. One moment he was simply calling him to ask about the kitten and the next Atobe insisted on showing him that he has the very best accommodations available for any sort animal and Tezuka simply must come and see for himself.
Peafowls strut over the immaculately tended lawn. They sit on hedges trimmed into shapes of unicorns and giant tennis balls. They nest in flowerbeds teeming with blooms in all possible colors. Suddenly a roar echoes over the grounds and they flutter their wings in distress.
"They must be feeding the Siberian tigers," Atobe remarks with studied casualness. "We have agreed to aid in the breeding program - a fairly important undertaking, seeing as these magnificent creatures are endangered."
"Aa," Tezuka says. He doesn't quite know what else to do but nod occasionally. All he wants to know is whether Atobe will take the kitten and raise it with love, patience and wisdom. Siberian Tigers have no matter in that. He hopes.
The car pulls to a stop right before a broad set of marble steps leading up to the mansion. A butler opens the door. Tezuka feels monumentally awkward and slightly annoyed. He can open the door of the car perfectly fine himself. Atobe leads them inside, gleaming shoes crunching on the shining white gravel. Kabaji trails a pace behind Tezuka on the left, as though he suspects him for attempting to make a break for it. Tezuka's almost tempted. He much more prefers either of their company on the other side of the net on a tennis court. He knows precisely what to do then. But this is rather beyond him.
"Would you care for some mimosa, Tezuka?" Atobe ask him.
When one is Tezuka Kunimitsu, one does not say 'umm'. But it is pretty close right then. Instead he just blinks in a way he hopes to be enquiring.
"It's virgin."
He has absolutely no idea what Atobe is babbling about, though he would not be surprised he has a harem of willing girls at his beck and call stowed away somewhere. "No, thank you," he says eventually. "Sorry for the trouble."
"My mother and father are still entangled in some debate with a few of our business associates," Atobe continues on smoothly, flipping his hair aside. "My apologies."
Though he simply inclines his head, Tezuka knows only relief. As if one Atobe is not bad enough. Perish the thought of dealing with three of them.
"Shall I show you the killer whales, perhaps?" Atobe asks him, smiling.
Tezuka sincerely hopes that the whales won't have anything to do with cats, rather like the tigers. But he is a guest and thus he shall strive to be perfectly polite and courteous, so he follows. They are led through sumptuous hallways. Vases of roses teeter on what seems to be any available surface at hand. Intricate frescos dazzle him when he looks up. Marble floors gleam. Paintings hang at perfect intervals, portraying men and women with Atobe's hair and eyes, the proud tilt of his chin. They pass through what seems to be a vast ballroom, an incredible dining room flaunting a table that must be able to seat over fifty people and an indoor swimming pool complete with several slides and three jacuzzis.
Tezuka suspects Atobe is not quite taking the most straightforward route.
At long last they arrive at the basin. Three orcas, each about the size of a bus, weave through the water with surprising grace. At a gesture of Atobe one of them swims up to the glass pane and regards them with keen intelligence.
Atobe looks at him expectantly.
Tezuka stares back. "I suppose you keep your cats elsewhere?" he ventures after a while.
"Of course," Atobe tsks. But he deflates some. "Come along then."
This time it only takes two hallways and a staircase. Tezuka can hear the cats before he sees them. At a snap of Atobe's fingers, Kabaji opens a door.
Cats.
Everywhere.
More than Tezuka ever imagined there were.
All sizes and colors and sorts. Cat condos, scratching posts, climbing jungles and cat beds. Skeins of wool, wind-up mouses and wall dancers. Gleaming bowls of food, sparkling saucers of water. Pristine litter boxes.
Tezuka can only stare. No doubt this must be a paradise for cats. A herd of cats stampede towards Kabaji and clamber all over him. The purring is deafening. Kabaji stands stoic, big shovel-sized hands delicately petting, his feet covered in a rolling furry blanket of adoring felines. Their fur shines sleek and bright with health.
Atobe seems pleased with his reaction and steps inside to pluck up a specimen bearing striking likeness to Echizen's cat. "Any questions you have you may ask Mikael, he'll answer them."
"Pleased to be of assistance," Mikael says, bowing to him.
"Aa," Tezuka agrees, wondering whether Atobe keeps butlers folded away in corners for when he has need of them. Like those virgins.
Mikael has an open, friendly face when he directs himself at Tezuka to ask: "What sort of cat will be joining us? A California Spangled? Kurilian Bobtail? Or a Minskin perhaps?"
"I am not sure," Tezuka hazards. A pause. He thinks for a moment. "She has stripes," he adds thoughtfully.
"Ah." The butler says, blinking. "No matter, they are all welcome. Even those of… ah, less fortunate lineages."
"Good," Tezuka says, pleased. "She is still very small and needs to be bottle-fed. I assume Atobe knows how to-"
"Bo-chama?" Mikael splutters, seemingly shocked that Tezuka dare suggest such a thing. "No, of course not. Though he would undoubtedly be skilled at it, taking care of Bo-chama's pets is part of our job."
"… I see," Tezuka says. "So he does not…" he wonders how to express 'love' or 'cuddle' without sounding profoundly foolish.
Thankfully, Mikael seems to know what he is attempting to convey. "Bo-chama makes an effort to distribute his presence equally amongst all his pets. Usually he takes a greater hand in the care of the hounds and horses."
"Hm," Tezuka purses his lips.
Mikael seems flustered. "It is simply impossible for Bo-chama to spend time with every single one of the animals every day. They adore him regardless, even those on the island."
"The… the island?" Tezuka repeats, shocked.
"Hai," the butler smiles at him, interpreting Tezuka's blank look for one of profound awe. "For the animals that do not fit on the premises. He flies out to visit them once a month."
"Right." Tezuka says.
Atobe must have seen some of his concern in Tezuka's eyes, because he walks up to him with all presences dropped. "Tezuka?"
"This…" Tezuka frowns, uncomfortable that he must turn Atobe's offer down. "While I have no doubt that these cats are well taken care for and content, I would prefer to find someplace more… of a home."
Atobe opens his mouth to protest, then closes it. "I would not mind keeping her in my room," he hazards after a while.
"Bo-chama already has so many responsibilities!" Mikael protests. "I would be honored to-"
"Sorry for the trouble," Tezuka delicately interrupts him. "But I will look elsewhere. You are very generous, Atobe."
Atobe looks rather pinched, as though he's failed a very important test. But he nods, slowly. "I understand."
What an uncomfortable situation. Both Mikael and Kabaji stare at Tezuka as though he is a heartless wretch for making Atobe doubt his prowess at caring for animals. And it is not that Tezuka even doubts him, or questions the contentment of any creature he owns. But he intends to find the cat a home where there's someone who smiles at her first thing in the morning and bids her a goodnight every evening. Someone devoted to her with their whole heart and soul.
After having been left to die in the rain, that is the very least she deserves.
Tezuka doesn't know how to explain this. So he offers the very best next alternative. "We could play a game of tennis?"
After a stifled moment, Atobe smiles a smile as sharp as a razor.
***
The sun is setting when they are forced to decide on a draw.
Neither of them would have, but a butler looking mighty like Mikael had come trotting up to them to inform Atobe that his father required him inside. And it seems that Atobe's father will is law, because Atobe did not even attempt to put up a protest, even though he is clearly reluctant.
"Tezuka," he says between heavy breaths as he pats at his face with a snowy white towel. "My driver will take you home."
"That won't be-"
"Yes, it will be," Atobe cuts over him. "I am giving you a little something for your… ah, kitten. And I won't take no for an answer," he hurriedly adds as Tezuka opens his mouth.
Tezuka closes it to produce a proper frown before saying: "I am not keeping the cat, Atobe."
"Ahn?" Atobe goes, muffled, with his back turned to Tezuka. "Well, then I suppose you can give it to whomever will become her new owner."
The little something turns out to be what seems a lifetime supply of luxury cat food. Tezuka has no choice but to stack the cans in his room. They line a whole wall and then some, like a bad parody of new wallpaper. There's also a sea of cans lined up like soldiers under his bed and yet more cans under his desk, stacked so far out Tezuka now has to sit with his knees drawn up on his chair if he does homework.
Wonderful.
***
That night Tezuka lies curled on his side in bed, watching the fuzzy bump of the kitten's body as she sleeps. Carefully, with the tip of his finger, he strokes along her spine. She's soft.
Surely there must be someone who would take her and love her like she's supposed to be. It is impossible not to adore something so tiny and fluffy. She's positively… cute. Tezuka's train of thought grinds to a stop. Cute. Girls like cute things, don't they? How can this not have occurred to him before?
"I think I know someone else who might like you, Cat." Tezuka whispers to her under his breath.
In her sleep, she sighs and tips her head into his palm.
***
Miyuki picks up almost as soon as the dial tone engages. "THIEF-BRO!" she shrieks through the phone.
Tezuka winces. In his lap, the kitten arches her back and hisses. Sort of. It rather sounds as though she sneezes. The outburst actually propels her backwards and she lands in a confused heap between a pile of books and tennis balls.
"Miyuki," Tezuka acknowledges.
"It's been so LONG!" Miyuki tells him. "Why didn't ya call me sooner?"
Scooping Cat up Tezuka drops her in the cradle of his legs again. He'd rather have her not wandering off. Before school this morning she'd crawled under his bookcase and had refused to come out. Tezuka had been five minutes late this time, arriving with dustbunnies still clinging to his hair. Inui had felt it necessary to comment that his Hairy Little Problem was distracting him. He's not distracted! But he can't hardly let her stay and starve under the bookcase either.
Meanwhile Miyuki is going on a mile a minute. About school, about tennis, about her brother, about how Tezuka just disappeared and how is his shoulder?
He tells her it is fine.
"We should play again, Racket Thief-bro," she says suddenly, a little too fast, a little too flippant.
Tezuka blinks. He's not sure if he should tell her that it is a long way to go for one single leisure match. There's an awkward silence as Tezuka fails to provide a proper response.
"That's… that's not why you were calling, huh?" Miyuki mumbles at last.
"Aa," Tezuka manages, realizing he didn't do something he was supposed to do but not quite sure what it even is. "Would you like a cat?" he asks instead, hoping to cheer her.
"… a cat?" Miyuki echoes, sounding monumentally unimpressed.
"A cat. Meow."
"I know what a cat is!" she snaps.
It's like Shishido all over again. Tezuka pinches the bridge of his nose.
Miyuki sucks in a breath and continues in a calmer tone: "What would I want with a cat?"
"Keep it as a pet?' Tezuka hazards.
"Tcha." Miyuki sighs. "I don't really like cats."
Impossible.
"But…" Tezuka looks at Cat. "She's small and cute and fluffy?"
"So what?" Miyuki asks him. "Not all girls like that sorta stuff, Thief Bro."
"Oh," Tezuka goes, confused. "I am sorry for the trouble."
"No big," Miyuki answers.
Running the backs of his knuckles along her tiny body, Tezuka silently apologizes to Cat. Another dead end.
On the other end of the phone Miyuki whispers softly: "Guess I'll see you around then?" and then a small hopeful "Sometime?" follows it up.
"Of course," Tezuka answers, smiling a little. "Bye-"
"Thief-bro."
"Yes?"
"You sound like you'd rather keep the stupid cat yourself. Silly."
She hangs up.
Tezuka stares in disbelief at his mobile phone.
…on to part two!
Comment on part two, please.