(no subject)
I feel that today's mishap deserves an el jay entry, being as it was truly, truly pathetic. So it snowed yesterday/last night/this morning, and it was magical. I woke up, looked outside, and everything was blanketed in white. Lovely. But seven or eight inches of fresh powder is quite a force to be reckoned with, and i figured that it would be a wise move to take care of it. So I put on my gloves, and my jacket, and figured that I would clear the driveway then eat some lunch. The shoveling itself was fairly uneventful. I am a weak, weak human being, so it took a long time to get a little bit done. But I kept at it. After all I have the ball in a week, and also my derriere has gotten a bit jiggly, so I would like to tighten up a bit. After about thirty minutes I decided to take a break. A salad for lunch, I told myself, will be appropriate. Just then, though, a plow guy showed up. I said should I move my car, and he said yes, and that is where the trouble began.
I pulled out of my driveway and figured in the time that it would take to go to the boat launch a little down the road and turn around, he would be done and I would have a fine driveway. So I pulled in, started turning around, and got stuck. I thought how can this be? I am in a Subaru! I have all wheel drive! Yet I looked back, and the back wheel was just spinning. And I looked forward, and the front wheel wasn't moving at all. I got out of the car and started kicking some of the snow away. My shoes were getting ever colder, leaving everything south of my shins numb. But I kept at it. Remove snow, try again. Remove snow, try again. I rocked the car back and forth as best I could. I went slowly, steadily. Nothing. Not a damn thing. Half an hour, maybe forty-five minutes into the ordeal, I gave up. I was cold and hungry. I didn't have my phone on me, and my hair was wet and ears were freezing, and I trudged home. I decided to forego the salad, and eat mashed potatoes out of spite. I watched an episode of Deadwood and wrote an imploring Facebook status. I felt very sorry for myself indeed, when I checked AIM and noticed that my friend Candice was on. Help, indeed, I thought.
She rushed over, and I explained the problem. We'll get you out in a jiffy, she said, and down to the boat launch we went. We tried very hard to unstick my scooby. We used sand, and patience, and she pushed my car. We utilized the Secret, using positive thoughts, imagining the car sitting pristinely on my driveway. No good. We were about to give up when a kind snowmobiler tried to help us. He shoveled around the wheels and put sand everywhere, and did all that we had done, but my car was unstickable. We gave up and went to dinner.
I'm tired, so I will conclude. We went down one last time, and these guys were unsticking a massive van. They had a chain tied to the van tied to Suburban. It was exciting to watch. Then they helped me. Pushed me right out. Then Candice came over and we had tea
I pulled out of my driveway and figured in the time that it would take to go to the boat launch a little down the road and turn around, he would be done and I would have a fine driveway. So I pulled in, started turning around, and got stuck. I thought how can this be? I am in a Subaru! I have all wheel drive! Yet I looked back, and the back wheel was just spinning. And I looked forward, and the front wheel wasn't moving at all. I got out of the car and started kicking some of the snow away. My shoes were getting ever colder, leaving everything south of my shins numb. But I kept at it. Remove snow, try again. Remove snow, try again. I rocked the car back and forth as best I could. I went slowly, steadily. Nothing. Not a damn thing. Half an hour, maybe forty-five minutes into the ordeal, I gave up. I was cold and hungry. I didn't have my phone on me, and my hair was wet and ears were freezing, and I trudged home. I decided to forego the salad, and eat mashed potatoes out of spite. I watched an episode of Deadwood and wrote an imploring Facebook status. I felt very sorry for myself indeed, when I checked AIM and noticed that my friend Candice was on. Help, indeed, I thought.
She rushed over, and I explained the problem. We'll get you out in a jiffy, she said, and down to the boat launch we went. We tried very hard to unstick my scooby. We used sand, and patience, and she pushed my car. We utilized the Secret, using positive thoughts, imagining the car sitting pristinely on my driveway. No good. We were about to give up when a kind snowmobiler tried to help us. He shoveled around the wheels and put sand everywhere, and did all that we had done, but my car was unstickable. We gave up and went to dinner.
I'm tired, so I will conclude. We went down one last time, and these guys were unsticking a massive van. They had a chain tied to the van tied to Suburban. It was exciting to watch. Then they helped me. Pushed me right out. Then Candice came over and we had tea