You tried to save a sandwich from a bullet?
I am not a foodie by any stretch of the imagination. Being a vegetarian has a tendency to put the kibosh on chowing down on Kobe beef, roasted duck, lardo and ceviche. I'm not really a food snob, either. I'm perfectly content sipping on Swiss Miss Hot Chocolate instead of plunking down $4 for a Starbucks Hot Chocolate.
But -- I am passionate about what I eat. I fall in love with food in the same way most people fall in love with other people -- completely and rapturously. You can't stop talking about your beloved and want to be with them all the time.
I fell in love again recently. With Sandwich -- a food so glorious that it deserves to be considered as a proper noun. I've had one of these every day for the last three days and I plan on having one for dinner tonight.
Sandwich is simple, easy to make and weepingly delicious. Eating it for the first time caused me to have a bit of a metaphysical crisis -- "Why? Why did I even bother eating anything else? This is so good! So good!"
So, because I want you to be as gloriously happy as I am when eating Sandwich, here is the how-to:
+ One Amoroso Hoagie Roll (Yes, it must be an Amoroso roll because they are proof of divinity. Dan told me that bread tasted better in Philly because of the water. I didn't believe him and then, I moved here and completely changed my mind. Trust me on this one).
+ Extra Virgin Olive Oil (And for those of you thinking, "Oooh! EVOO!", let me paraphrase a little Anthony Bourdain for you -- "Rachael Ray does to food what Hitler did to Poland")
+ Red onion
+ Green pepper
+ Portobello mushrooms
+ Mozzarella cheese
+ Sundried tomatoes
+ Salt, black pepper and basil.
Drizzle the olive oil lightly on the bread. Lay down portobello mushroom slices. Lightly drizzle olive oil again. Layer alternating rings of pepper and onion. Sprinkle with salt, pepper and basil. Lay down sundried tomatoes. Add cheese. Add salt, pepper and basil again.
Bake at 350°F for ten minutes or until melty and slightly blackened.
Serve with sweet tea and experience gastronomic ecstasy/metaphysical crisis.
A conversation between Dan and I last night:
Jaime (with mouthful of Sandwich): I love you.
Dan: I love you t...Wait. You're talking to the sandwich, aren't you?
Jaime (muffled by sandwich): Mmmhmph...yeah.
And if that doesn't convince you how amazing Sandwich is, here is a man who truly understands the importance of sandwiches -- Mr. Ross Geller:
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