(no subject)
i really want to post this in the ftm community, but my page expires everytime i open a new page so i cant
My problem is graduation. (im a senior in High school this year, for those of you who dont know) at my school the guys wear a red gown and the girls a white gown (with a dress... pants are NOT allowed, technically... but a butch girl a few years ago wore pants) for commencements. i took my mothers idea nad asked permission to wear red. i talked to mr f (big fat guy who is the sponser of the senior class and does all this crap) for the last 2 years ive kind of known him... he addressed me as "sir." so i knew that going there there'd be confusion. but thought it would help me in the long run, right?
Mr.f. : "yes sir?"
me: "youre the guy to talk to about graduation, right?"
f: Yeah
me: well i was wondering if i coudl be allowed to wear a red gown. guys wear red and girls are wearing white, right?
f: (confused) yeah, well... guys ARE wearing red.
me: Yeah i know, thats why im asking if itll be ok, if i wore red too.
f: guys are wearing red... (me:"i know.") .... girls wear white.
*stared at me in that look you all know, im sure.* ya know, the one that ripes you apart inside. that one.
f:well, girls have to wear white. No. guys wear red and girls wear white (he kept on saying)
me: alright, well, thank you.
he was getting frustrated and confused and probably rather embaressed.
So i went and talk to ms davis (shes the health teacher who had me talk to her classes last year about gender id and sexulity and related topics) she asked if iwas still seeing a councelor (at the time her nad i started w/ these talks, i was seeing a councelor. i never went to a gender specific one and was "officially" diagnosed w/ GID... even though WE ALL KNOW I HAVE IT!) i misinterpted her question of "are you seeing your councelor" to me my SCHOOL councelor...and said yes (i didnt realize this till after i left the room)
i told her i didnt know who to tlak to about htis and thought shed be the only one to understand and respect this issue. (which is 100% true) so w/ that misinterpretation, she told me i should get my councelor to write a letter saying that (ms davis)"...i think he should be allowed to wear a red gown, as part of the therapy he is recieving for ... transgendered? (me: well, GID, or transgendered) yeah, well for gid/trans that this would be good for him and any other alternative could be damaging to his well being." or osmething like that, she said. she also said i should get some of my teachers to say something too. she said she would, but she also thinks i should get some who really know me. (my art teacehrs) id be more comfortable talking to rubenstein, over sonders. i was going to talk to rub. today, but she was too busy i couldnt find a right moment. i worry though, cuz id have to spread this out to way back and explain everything.
i signed up to get called down to my school councelor, but hes not here today. so i signed up for dr spurr (the other lady that helped me and a few other people, last year) but w/ her, it was weird cuz last year it was all about "being gay" and well, even though i felt this way way before last year, i havent been comfortable verballizing it till recently.... so itll be weird i think.
so blah balh... this is total bullshit... wouldnt u say? that asshole knew i was a guy for 2 years at least and now all of a sudden, he expects THAT guy to wear a white gown and dress to his graduation, how many other guys out tehre is he forcing to!?doesnt he realize how stupid he is!?if i end up wearing a white one (which im goign to do everything in my power not to) ill wear BLACK PANTS (see through white) and a white shirt w/ black letters on the front that says "FUCK YOU!" so everyone can see it.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE if anyone have any ideas i would love to hear it.
and for the people at my school...
ms davis made the point htat everyone would "expect" me to wear a red one... so if you fellow classmates otu there can think of a way to help me... i would so much appreciate it. if things work out w/ teachers saying things ,i may not need it... but i think that if the administration knew that everyone else supports me, then thatll be good too.
thanks for hte feedback... i really want this to work out.
My problem is graduation. (im a senior in High school this year, for those of you who dont know) at my school the guys wear a red gown and the girls a white gown (with a dress... pants are NOT allowed, technically... but a butch girl a few years ago wore pants) for commencements. i took my mothers idea nad asked permission to wear red. i talked to mr f (big fat guy who is the sponser of the senior class and does all this crap) for the last 2 years ive kind of known him... he addressed me as "sir." so i knew that going there there'd be confusion. but thought it would help me in the long run, right?
Mr.f. : "yes sir?"
me: "youre the guy to talk to about graduation, right?"
f: Yeah
me: well i was wondering if i coudl be allowed to wear a red gown. guys wear red and girls are wearing white, right?
f: (confused) yeah, well... guys ARE wearing red.
me: Yeah i know, thats why im asking if itll be ok, if i wore red too.
f: guys are wearing red... (me:"i know.") .... girls wear white.
*stared at me in that look you all know, im sure.* ya know, the one that ripes you apart inside. that one.
f:well, girls have to wear white. No. guys wear red and girls wear white (he kept on saying)
me: alright, well, thank you.
he was getting frustrated and confused and probably rather embaressed.
So i went and talk to ms davis (shes the health teacher who had me talk to her classes last year about gender id and sexulity and related topics) she asked if iwas still seeing a councelor (at the time her nad i started w/ these talks, i was seeing a councelor. i never went to a gender specific one and was "officially" diagnosed w/ GID... even though WE ALL KNOW I HAVE IT!) i misinterpted her question of "are you seeing your councelor" to me my SCHOOL councelor...and said yes (i didnt realize this till after i left the room)
i told her i didnt know who to tlak to about htis and thought shed be the only one to understand and respect this issue. (which is 100% true) so w/ that misinterpretation, she told me i should get my councelor to write a letter saying that (ms davis)"...i think he should be allowed to wear a red gown, as part of the therapy he is recieving for ... transgendered? (me: well, GID, or transgendered) yeah, well for gid/trans that this would be good for him and any other alternative could be damaging to his well being." or osmething like that, she said. she also said i should get some of my teachers to say something too. she said she would, but she also thinks i should get some who really know me. (my art teacehrs) id be more comfortable talking to rubenstein, over sonders. i was going to talk to rub. today, but she was too busy i couldnt find a right moment. i worry though, cuz id have to spread this out to way back and explain everything.
i signed up to get called down to my school councelor, but hes not here today. so i signed up for dr spurr (the other lady that helped me and a few other people, last year) but w/ her, it was weird cuz last year it was all about "being gay" and well, even though i felt this way way before last year, i havent been comfortable verballizing it till recently.... so itll be weird i think.
so blah balh... this is total bullshit... wouldnt u say? that asshole knew i was a guy for 2 years at least and now all of a sudden, he expects THAT guy to wear a white gown and dress to his graduation, how many other guys out tehre is he forcing to!?doesnt he realize how stupid he is!?if i end up wearing a white one (which im goign to do everything in my power not to) ill wear BLACK PANTS (see through white) and a white shirt w/ black letters on the front that says "FUCK YOU!" so everyone can see it.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE if anyone have any ideas i would love to hear it.
and for the people at my school...
ms davis made the point htat everyone would "expect" me to wear a red one... so if you fellow classmates otu there can think of a way to help me... i would so much appreciate it. if things work out w/ teachers saying things ,i may not need it... but i think that if the administration knew that everyone else supports me, then thatll be good too.
thanks for hte feedback... i really want this to work out.