I give up.
I have finally used too many words in Euro traces to the point where I barely understand them enough to study them. Therefore, the only way I see around this is to condense them into modernspeak.
Yeah, if you'll look at them, you'll see the idea isn't 100% origanal. But it'll get me to the exam, and I don't really have another place to store them, besides the life-force that is LJ.
And, I figure, if I'm going to screw off, I may as well learn something at the same time.
So, without further adieu, I bring you :
Greece. Rome. They coo', yo?
Burkhardt-Tight. Peace out.
Burke-Whatchu callin' tight, muthefuckah? Shit, there was, like, 80 renaissances. It ain't different from them.
---
Hansa-We be tha Hanseatic League...trade with us because we're scared of pirates and crap.
---
Medicis-Yo, we be makin the floss for Europe. Italians are our homies. Let's bank!
France-To hell with you! Whatthefuck do we need muthahfuckin BANKERS for, yo?
---
Castiglione- My first name is Baldassare so I'd better damned well be a good writer. Courtiers should do good crap. Like, be graceful and shit. And at least pretend to be moral.
Alberti-Sure, I'll write a book too. Uh. Don't kill infants.
---
Milan, Florence, and Naples-We be cooler than you, Venice & tha Papacy!
Venice & tha Papacy-Heyll no, bitch! let's have a catfight!
Sforza-Yo, France, c'mere and break this up?
Charles 8-Hell yeah!
Ferdinand of Argon-Hell no you didn't leave me out, dick!
Machiavelli-Bitches, break it up. Let's get a REAL man in here; someone with intellegence.
---
Petrach-Man. He's da bomb.
Humanists-Holla at Petrach!
Virgil & Cicero-We weren't in with the right crowd when we were alive but now we're so damned popular! Holla!
All ya'll bitches BOW!
Bruni-Dude. Let's get some of this Humanist crap in politics!
Valla-the hell is this shit?! The Donation of Constantine is a forgery! Put that in your pipe and smoke it, popes!
Braccionelli-The church is funny as shit.
Pico del Mirandola-Holla at Petrarch again. Man is, like, teh shit.
Guttenberg-LOOKITME!! I'm so damned cool. I made a Bible.
---
Botacelli-That Venus chick is hawt. She's so hawt I did her twice. Painted her, that is.
Donatello-David is my boy. He is bronze and nude. Holla.
da Vinci-Holla at ME! I'm teh cool. I cut up human bodies and shit. And I did HIGH Renaissance art. You know, high. Like Raphael was when he did School of Athens.
Raphael-Dude, them damned scholars were like, so hard to paint! Have respect for my representin'! *has more weed*
Michelangelo-Donatello! My boy! David is, like, totally hot when you sculpt him nekkid!
Donatello-True dat.
Brunelleschi-My church is teh shit. It's open.
Jan van Eyek-All you bitches BOW. I did a self-portrait.
---
Charles 8-I got my home boys in my army and I can levy the tallie whenever the hell.
Louis 11 "Spider"- Yo, my name is Spider and I kept the tallie. I'm devious and sneakier than a pile of hay.
---
Family 1-I have a red rose on my coat of arms.
Family 2-Oh no you didn't! I have a white one!
Family 1-We are SO fighting a war.
Family 2-War of the Roses, baby!
Henry 7-OMFG everything is like so totaly unorganized CENTRALIZE GOVERNMENT MAKE IT RIGHT GET FILING FOLDERS WITH COLORED TABS ON THEM AHHHHHSIGOIOGIIOGOGIIOG!!!
Economic instability-Waaah I want in on the war! Fine, I'll make my own. It shall be called...the 100 years war! Peace OUT!
---
Ferdinand & Isabella-To hell with all you non-Catholics! Like, seriously.
---
Hapsburgs-We are moving UP in the world! Representin' tha HRE!
---
Concilliarism-Let's reform the church!
Leo-His Holiness the Materialist
Julius-His Holiness the Mindless Warrior
Alexander-His Holiness of Inceset
Sixtus-His Holiness of Nepotism
Great Schism-In the words of Erin, when they started out with 2 popes, had a consul to get rid of one and ended up with 3!
Wycleff-Give me the Bible in a language I can freaking read it in!
Lollardies-Holla.
Hus-I'm melting I'm melting! I'm burning I'm burning! Damn it to hell, Catholic materialists!
Hussites-Holla.
Cut for language
Oh, and please note, I did not write this with the intention of entertaining anybody. It's sheerly for my own benifit. So if you become aware of the fact that it sucks, I'm already in on that, thanks:)
Yeah, if you'll look at them, you'll see the idea isn't 100% origanal. But it'll get me to the exam, and I don't really have another place to store them, besides the life-force that is LJ.
And, I figure, if I'm going to screw off, I may as well learn something at the same time.
So, without further adieu, I bring you :
Greece. Rome. They coo', yo?
Burkhardt-Tight. Peace out.
Burke-Whatchu callin' tight, muthefuckah? Shit, there was, like, 80 renaissances. It ain't different from them.
---
Hansa-We be tha Hanseatic League...trade with us because we're scared of pirates and crap.
---
Medicis-Yo, we be makin the floss for Europe. Italians are our homies. Let's bank!
France-To hell with you! Whatthefuck do we need muthahfuckin BANKERS for, yo?
---
Castiglione- My first name is Baldassare so I'd better damned well be a good writer. Courtiers should do good crap. Like, be graceful and shit. And at least pretend to be moral.
Alberti-Sure, I'll write a book too. Uh. Don't kill infants.
---
Milan, Florence, and Naples-We be cooler than you, Venice & tha Papacy!
Venice & tha Papacy-Heyll no, bitch! let's have a catfight!
Sforza-Yo, France, c'mere and break this up?
Charles 8-Hell yeah!
Ferdinand of Argon-Hell no you didn't leave me out, dick!
Machiavelli-Bitches, break it up. Let's get a REAL man in here; someone with intellegence.
---
Petrach-Man. He's da bomb.
Humanists-Holla at Petrach!
Virgil & Cicero-We weren't in with the right crowd when we were alive but now we're so damned popular! Holla!
All ya'll bitches BOW!
Bruni-Dude. Let's get some of this Humanist crap in politics!
Valla-the hell is this shit?! The Donation of Constantine is a forgery! Put that in your pipe and smoke it, popes!
Braccionelli-The church is funny as shit.
Pico del Mirandola-Holla at Petrarch again. Man is, like, teh shit.
Guttenberg-LOOKITME!! I'm so damned cool. I made a Bible.
---
Botacelli-That Venus chick is hawt. She's so hawt I did her twice. Painted her, that is.
Donatello-David is my boy. He is bronze and nude. Holla.
da Vinci-Holla at ME! I'm teh cool. I cut up human bodies and shit. And I did HIGH Renaissance art. You know, high. Like Raphael was when he did School of Athens.
Raphael-Dude, them damned scholars were like, so hard to paint! Have respect for my representin'! *has more weed*
Michelangelo-Donatello! My boy! David is, like, totally hot when you sculpt him nekkid!
Donatello-True dat.
Brunelleschi-My church is teh shit. It's open.
Jan van Eyek-All you bitches BOW. I did a self-portrait.
---
Charles 8-I got my home boys in my army and I can levy the tallie whenever the hell.
Louis 11 "Spider"- Yo, my name is Spider and I kept the tallie. I'm devious and sneakier than a pile of hay.
---
Family 1-I have a red rose on my coat of arms.
Family 2-Oh no you didn't! I have a white one!
Family 1-We are SO fighting a war.
Family 2-War of the Roses, baby!
Henry 7-OMFG everything is like so totaly unorganized CENTRALIZE GOVERNMENT MAKE IT RIGHT GET FILING FOLDERS WITH COLORED TABS ON THEM AHHHHHSIGOIOGIIOGOGIIOG!!!
Economic instability-Waaah I want in on the war! Fine, I'll make my own. It shall be called...the 100 years war! Peace OUT!
---
Ferdinand & Isabella-To hell with all you non-Catholics! Like, seriously.
---
Hapsburgs-We are moving UP in the world! Representin' tha HRE!
---
Concilliarism-Let's reform the church!
Leo-His Holiness the Materialist
Julius-His Holiness the Mindless Warrior
Alexander-His Holiness of Inceset
Sixtus-His Holiness of Nepotism
Great Schism-In the words of Erin, when they started out with 2 popes, had a consul to get rid of one and ended up with 3!
Wycleff-Give me the Bible in a language I can freaking read it in!
Lollardies-Holla.
Hus-I'm melting I'm melting! I'm burning I'm burning! Damn it to hell, Catholic materialists!
Hussites-Holla.
Cut for language
Oh, and please note, I did not write this with the intention of entertaining anybody. It's sheerly for my own benifit. So if you become aware of the fact that it sucks, I'm already in on that, thanks:)