(no subject)
Jude is ace. He gets a little bit fatter every day. I like to have a look at him in his moses basket in the morning, when he is still all swaddled up like an egg roll, and watch him snuffle before he wakes up. So far, he is going to sleep at 10.30/11pm, sleeping until around 4am, then being fed and going back to sleep until 7am. Sometimes Ros has to feed him again then and they both drift off to sleep in bed together. Other times he just stays asleep until 9am. Then in the mornings he is a little angel and just lies there waving his arms around. In the evenings he is grouchy and wants to feed constantly. Because she is breast feeding Ros is completely at his mercy. But she likes it. Its kind of strange for me though. Its easy for me to ask Ros’s permission to pick him up if he growls or something. She always says “do whatever you want to, he’s your son too” which is nice. But there is no doubt that if he was bottle fed it would be easier for me to have a ‘more’ equal role in his care. But I guess co-parents always feel like this. As a father its what you expect. But not as a mother. And I am his mother, as much as Ros is. In my opinion anyway.
Ros’s mother, Anna, is staying with us at the moment. She has become very cantankerous. Its sad because she is only 63 but suffers from heart and blood pressure problems and seems much older than she is. She didn’t want to be called Granny/Grandma/Nana. So she is Nanny. Which is kind of strange at the moment but I am sure we will get used to it. When she is there I feel a strange kind of pressure. I think Ros does to. Like we are worrying that she thinks he should be in a better routine or something. She hasn’t said anything though so I guess its our own anxiety. It will be nice when we are on our own again. But equally I like it that Ros isn’t alone in the daytime. I think she has been a bit irritated by her mum’s cantankerous-ness. For example, Steptoe type comments about ‘immigrants’ and ‘coloureds’. She even said the N word. I have never known her to be racist before. Our friend Sarah thinks its because she has been hanging around with her saxophone teacher, an ageing retired racist homophobic police officer called Johnny.
If she EVER says anything racist in front of Jude (when he is old enough to take it in which will be sooner than we think I suspect) I am going to tell her to please refrain from talking like that in front of him. I do not wish him to hear any views like that if I can help it.
Ros’s mother, Anna, is staying with us at the moment. She has become very cantankerous. Its sad because she is only 63 but suffers from heart and blood pressure problems and seems much older than she is. She didn’t want to be called Granny/Grandma/Nana. So she is Nanny. Which is kind of strange at the moment but I am sure we will get used to it. When she is there I feel a strange kind of pressure. I think Ros does to. Like we are worrying that she thinks he should be in a better routine or something. She hasn’t said anything though so I guess its our own anxiety. It will be nice when we are on our own again. But equally I like it that Ros isn’t alone in the daytime. I think she has been a bit irritated by her mum’s cantankerous-ness. For example, Steptoe type comments about ‘immigrants’ and ‘coloureds’. She even said the N word. I have never known her to be racist before. Our friend Sarah thinks its because she has been hanging around with her saxophone teacher, an ageing retired racist homophobic police officer called Johnny.
If she EVER says anything racist in front of Jude (when he is old enough to take it in which will be sooner than we think I suspect) I am going to tell her to please refrain from talking like that in front of him. I do not wish him to hear any views like that if I can help it.