Bad bad bad fanfiction!
We're having a bad!fanfic challenge at Whedonland and since it's participation only and mine is really really bad I decided to share! :D
EDWARD: So my girlfriend's name is Bella and she's so totally lame. She's like super lame. Sparkles get her hot.
SPIKE: Well, my bird's name is Drusilla and she's so totally crazy. She's like super crazy. Dolls get her hot.
ANGEL: See my soulmate's name is Buffy and she's so totally whiny. She's like super whiny. Fangs get her hot.
EDWARD: What kinda name is Buffy anyway? She's so totally lame too. Like Bella. And fangs get Bella hot too. She wants me to bite her all the time.
SPIKE: What are you going on about, you ponce? You don't even have decent fangs! ... But, yeah, fangs so get Dru hot too.
ANGEL: I so became a vampire 'cause fangs get girls hot.
EDWARD: And I became a vegetarian 'cause tortured guys so get them hot too.
ANGEL: Yeah, that's why I got a soul and got all broody.
SPIKE: Piss off! Bad boys so get girls more hot than tortured broody vegetarians.
EDWARD: Yeah, but you're actually cool so you can pull of the bad boy thing. We have to use puppy eyes.
ANGEL: Yeah, Spike, you're so cool. I wanna have sex with all the girls on my show without having to be all tortured and broody too.
SPIKE: Yeah, well, you both can't 'cause you're bloody lame. Now I'm gonna go find that Bella chic and teach her what Dru and Buffy already know.
ANGEL&EDWARD: What's that?
SPIKE: That fangs take care of getting you horny but the bad boys take care of you after that.
EDWARD: He has so done your girlfriend.
ANGEL: I know.
EDWARD: And he's so gonna do mine.
ANGEL: I know.
ANGEL&EDWARD: He's so cool.