Statement of Intent
Hearken,
I stand on the heap, now breathing in death
as I survey the blood soiled ground. I have fought the battle with every part of my Being. It has warped my psyche, raped my people, and burned my Temples but we don't tolerate those for whom through attrition fall.
I've wept, I've screamed, I've stood at the top of the Mountain and made deals with the Devil to grant me Victory. I have honored the Covenant of old and passed through the Celestial Gates. The kingdom Malkuth has been chained and trembles at my Name.
I WILL NOT CONCEDE!!!
(Ok, more serious)
Alas, I have cut out my own intestines. There they are...yep, just like I thought they'd look. I'm bleeding to death in this Tomb that I made for myself. I took out the knife that my boss stuck in my back and informed him I was gonna rip out his throat. I Quit.
If that wasn't enough to cut off that decaying piece of psychic garbage, I came into a butt-load of money, a fucking butt-load, and I stood on my head as I engaged in every bit of human opulence that had a price. I had no regard for this burning heaping pile of green dog shit as I wiped it out within two months. Two months! I could have made that last six months, just sitting on my ass. But if I thought safety and financial security were worth two shits and a fuck - I'd probably have stolen it from you in the night and used it to wipe out your children and demonize your gods!
So, being that each force has an equal and opposite force, I decided I would fuck all money collectors in their money hole. This includes utility companies, insurance firms, my apartment complex, and even the judicial system. Go suck a turnip!
Oh yeah, I'm a fucking genius. Cut out my own stomach. That will teach them. How would they like it if I just smashed my head on a rock?! That will show them.
I will stand up, proclaim that I AM, and shake the very nature of what we hold dear. I Am the lightning flash that strikes the Earth in explosive Dis. I Am the Force that Forces back upon Itself. I Am the Sword of Destruction that Creation wields. I Am the Spirit of Transformation that eternally kills It's Self so that New life can flourish.
I Am that I Am Not
It is time for Change. Not a new haircut change, not a new job change. It's time to shatter the very columns of My life. Dig down deep, way deep, stick my hand in the Shadow and pull up all that rotting feces that's been Consuming my dreams. No, no, no, no! Do not be fooled by the missionaries espousing Peace and Love as the Most Highest Goal. They deal out divine forgiveness on one hand and deny the hidden primal drives and motives on the other. They are the Father and Mother that neglect their children. Now their children turn to them with murder in their eyes and demons in their hearts. Fools. A wish denied is a demon born.
ZI ZI ANNUNAKI, KANPA
Ok, I think I'm done. I'm sure my internet will be shut off here soon, so I wanted to explain. Holy shit, did I explain. I can assure you that I am completely comfortable in this current muck, in case that wasn't clear. The real root of my "problems" in the Exterior World actually stem from aspects of the Self that I deny and repress within me. Like the children mentioned above, this creates unfulfilled primal urges and emotions that when left to lie unchecked they appear to us as gnashing demons on the Exterior World because we refuse to see them in our Inner World. When they are left unchecked for a long time they become a well known part of the psyche and just continue to consume all those healthier aspects in us, urging us to confront these demons face to face.
LUGAL ANU, LUM RI NE GIG E MU SA
( lord Anu, wash away the sickness in my mind )
TUS TUN DAMHARA
( settle all conflicts)