For Mamaw with much love
First, thanks to everyone that has been so supportive and kind the last few weeks. I went to relieve my mother on Monday at my grandmother's. I got there around 9am and she woke enough for me to get her adjusted in bed and for her to know I was there. She said, "Some party huh?" She kissed me and told me she loved me and went quickly back to sleep. I checked on her, read a book by her bed, and rubbed her back. Her nurse came around 11:30 so I gave her morphine after she left and rubbed her back again. Her nurse said it would not be long, maybe two weeks. Sad news so I called my mom and then let her talk for awhile to make sure she was okay. My mom arrived around 3:30 and my grandmother was very uncomfortable. I gave her more morphine and called the nurse to get more morphine delivered so it would be ready. At 4:30 my partner arrived with the girls and they got to see my grandmother and then my oldest went to opera practice and my youngest and I went to run some errands. My mother stayed with my grandmother and grandfather. It was only 20 minutes later that my mother called and said that she thought my grandmother was dead.
I arrived at my grandmother's just a few minutes later and checked for a pulse. She was gone. It was much sooner than expected and very much a shock. I comforted my mother and we called hospice. Her nurse was shocked. They suspect it was a heart attack because she went so quickly. Who knows, but she is at rest now. I am glad in a way that she went so quickly. She was suffering so very much.
We asked that they wait to pick her up at 10pm so that my aunt and sister could come from Indy to see her. It was such a gift to get to share her last day with her and then get plenty of time to tell her good bye. I spent time with her alone and with her and my mother and just felt so very fortunate to have had my grandmother in my life.
I feel the need to share with anyone reading that she was just always full of life. She loved to have people over, friends and family. She was always busy and generous. She seemed to love everyone. She was nurturing, kind, generous, loving, gentle, happy, lively, exciting, and so very strong.
Now I am mourning and at the same time I feel lucky to be alive and happy to be taking this as an opportunity to live fully and in the moment. I am re-evaluating aspects of my life and there may be some significant changes. There is a lot I am thinking about right now. Mostly, I am just feeling very blessed to have known my grandmother and blessed to have the life I have. I intend to make the most of it. She would want that.
I would also like to ask that anyone that has time/desire to get together this next week or so to call or write, company would be good right now.
I arrived at my grandmother's just a few minutes later and checked for a pulse. She was gone. It was much sooner than expected and very much a shock. I comforted my mother and we called hospice. Her nurse was shocked. They suspect it was a heart attack because she went so quickly. Who knows, but she is at rest now. I am glad in a way that she went so quickly. She was suffering so very much.
We asked that they wait to pick her up at 10pm so that my aunt and sister could come from Indy to see her. It was such a gift to get to share her last day with her and then get plenty of time to tell her good bye. I spent time with her alone and with her and my mother and just felt so very fortunate to have had my grandmother in my life.
I feel the need to share with anyone reading that she was just always full of life. She loved to have people over, friends and family. She was always busy and generous. She seemed to love everyone. She was nurturing, kind, generous, loving, gentle, happy, lively, exciting, and so very strong.
Now I am mourning and at the same time I feel lucky to be alive and happy to be taking this as an opportunity to live fully and in the moment. I am re-evaluating aspects of my life and there may be some significant changes. There is a lot I am thinking about right now. Mostly, I am just feeling very blessed to have known my grandmother and blessed to have the life I have. I intend to make the most of it. She would want that.
I would also like to ask that anyone that has time/desire to get together this next week or so to call or write, company would be good right now.