Frick!
There was a whole hour today where I wasn't worrying. It was a beautiful, beautiful hour. I used it to call my mother (she says hi). And then I met with a lovely professor who I like a lot and learned about how I have to get permission to do a creative senior project. To be fair I already knew this, but honestly I can't help but be totally freaked out because, hey, I've only wanted to do a fiction project since I got here but since I didn't know how to kiss ass I couldn't take a fiction workshop until this semester, therreby setting myself way behind all the other talent in my year.
God DAMN that makes me mad.
Anyway, if things don't work out and there's too much other talent then I'll have to do a critical project and I cannot stress enough how much that will suck. My criticism is okay at best and I don't have anywhere near the kind of focus that I would need to do one.
AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I honestly cannot remember the last time I wasn't stressing out about something. Usually it's something that's partially beyond my control but still I can't help but feel that if I was somehow better then it wouldn't even be an issue!
And god damn it, I want the car back!