chaos and confusion
I had a sinking feeling that the first day coming back to the paper from spring break would lead to some confusion or semi-chaos because I was freaking out again over the columns. We couldn't figure out who was writing the column whether we skip or stay on track. I assumed we'd resume the normal track but apparently the columnists didn't think so. So we're going to run guest columns instead ...
Yeah, I've been carrying a lot of guilt lately and I can't seem to shake it off. It's more than just a burden feeling guilty, it's stressful and painstakingly tiring. Maybe it's my personal view of having to have a strong work ethic and being good at everything possible. Maybe I need real therapy ... I mentioned to my sister our family could use therapy given the kind of communication that occurs between us. lol.
I'm not exactly sure what prompted me to cry again but it was supposed to be tears of happiness. One of the editors I worked with at my internship wrote me a reccomendation letter and even faxed it to me because I needed it by the end of this week. He was even going to overnight the letter to me if the fax wasn't sufficient. I wasn't planning to read the letter because it'd be self-serving but I did anyways. He wrote how his first impression of me was this quiet little girl who asked worldly and big questions that totally surprised him. He said he was taken aback that this quiet little girl would be so committed and dedicated to being better and asking so many questions. The editor even described how this one week my main editor wasn't available so I went to him and pitched my ideas or to flesh them out. He said I made progress from taking a vague idea to a more narrow and focused story. I couldn't believe the editor would write such a nice letter ... I was so blown away. I guess I didn't expect such good things because I always worried excessively whether I was doing enough.
Spring break was too short but semi-productive. I'm more than excited that my computer is linked with internet access now. It's so much easier to do homework without having to go to another room to use the net. And I did a lot of reading and spending time with my sisters. The three of us went out for ice cream at Baskin Robbins Saturday night and it was hillarious at how long it took for us to make a decision on the kind of ice cream we're going to have. The cashiers must've thought we were annoying but he was patient. It was so weird to be driving in a car with my sisters ... it's one of those really rare moments where we all bonded and shared stories.
Maybe I'll feel better in a few days. The Strokes are coming! The Strokes are coming to SF and I'll be there bright and early hopefully to score a good seat. I want to try staying in the pit the entire time hopefully to get a chance to see Julian if he walks into the pit up close.
Yeah, I've been carrying a lot of guilt lately and I can't seem to shake it off. It's more than just a burden feeling guilty, it's stressful and painstakingly tiring. Maybe it's my personal view of having to have a strong work ethic and being good at everything possible. Maybe I need real therapy ... I mentioned to my sister our family could use therapy given the kind of communication that occurs between us. lol.
I'm not exactly sure what prompted me to cry again but it was supposed to be tears of happiness. One of the editors I worked with at my internship wrote me a reccomendation letter and even faxed it to me because I needed it by the end of this week. He was even going to overnight the letter to me if the fax wasn't sufficient. I wasn't planning to read the letter because it'd be self-serving but I did anyways. He wrote how his first impression of me was this quiet little girl who asked worldly and big questions that totally surprised him. He said he was taken aback that this quiet little girl would be so committed and dedicated to being better and asking so many questions. The editor even described how this one week my main editor wasn't available so I went to him and pitched my ideas or to flesh them out. He said I made progress from taking a vague idea to a more narrow and focused story. I couldn't believe the editor would write such a nice letter ... I was so blown away. I guess I didn't expect such good things because I always worried excessively whether I was doing enough.
Spring break was too short but semi-productive. I'm more than excited that my computer is linked with internet access now. It's so much easier to do homework without having to go to another room to use the net. And I did a lot of reading and spending time with my sisters. The three of us went out for ice cream at Baskin Robbins Saturday night and it was hillarious at how long it took for us to make a decision on the kind of ice cream we're going to have. The cashiers must've thought we were annoying but he was patient. It was so weird to be driving in a car with my sisters ... it's one of those really rare moments where we all bonded and shared stories.
Maybe I'll feel better in a few days. The Strokes are coming! The Strokes are coming to SF and I'll be there bright and early hopefully to score a good seat. I want to try staying in the pit the entire time hopefully to get a chance to see Julian if he walks into the pit up close.