do you believe in always?...
and so begins another chapter of saddness in my book of many.
i just miss him so much.
now that he doesn't miss me i miss him more than ever. and it makes me think that if i could just stop missing him maybe he would miss me. but i cant. i mean, how can i? he was my other half. he took up space in me and now its all empty and echoing, all the beautiful memories of us bouncing off my inner walls. i just remember waking up to his arms around me, making nutella pancakes in his cello-saurus shirt, finding secret spots in nature, naked swimming, long kisses and the way that my head fits perfect under his chin. how his eyes just glowed when they met mine, that first sight of eachother after a month apart, all the times he wiped my tears and told me everything was ok because he was there and he would protect me.
all i want is to be wrapped up in him again. i want to start over and fall in love again. i know it wasn't always right but when it was it was better than anything i've ever felt.i just want to be beautiful in his eyes again for they are the only ones i care to please.
goddamn it i know nothing. i know nothing except all i feel is love. i don't even care what happened i don't care what was said i just want him. its as simple as that. but i don't think i'm going to get it. so i'll just have to cry.
i need a hug so bad right now.
but i only want it from one person.
and now the saddest song in the world:
you are my sunshine, my only sunshine.
you make me happy when skies are grey.
you'll never know dear how much i love you.
please don't take my sunshine away.
please come back.
i just miss him so much.
now that he doesn't miss me i miss him more than ever. and it makes me think that if i could just stop missing him maybe he would miss me. but i cant. i mean, how can i? he was my other half. he took up space in me and now its all empty and echoing, all the beautiful memories of us bouncing off my inner walls. i just remember waking up to his arms around me, making nutella pancakes in his cello-saurus shirt, finding secret spots in nature, naked swimming, long kisses and the way that my head fits perfect under his chin. how his eyes just glowed when they met mine, that first sight of eachother after a month apart, all the times he wiped my tears and told me everything was ok because he was there and he would protect me.
all i want is to be wrapped up in him again. i want to start over and fall in love again. i know it wasn't always right but when it was it was better than anything i've ever felt.i just want to be beautiful in his eyes again for they are the only ones i care to please.
goddamn it i know nothing. i know nothing except all i feel is love. i don't even care what happened i don't care what was said i just want him. its as simple as that. but i don't think i'm going to get it. so i'll just have to cry.
i need a hug so bad right now.
but i only want it from one person.
and now the saddest song in the world:
you are my sunshine, my only sunshine.
you make me happy when skies are grey.
you'll never know dear how much i love you.
please don't take my sunshine away.
please come back.