Will I ever be ok?

[eternalruby]

I'm really sad.

My father passed away.

I can never speak with him anymore.
I can never hug him.
I can never play farmville or other computer games with him.
I can never taste his cooking.
I can never laugh with him.
And a million other things....

And the worst part is,
I was not by his side when he passed away...
I did not hear his last words...
In fact, I was at least a hundred kilometers away...
He didn't get to see me for one last time...
I didn't get to see him for at least a month...

And I didn't think that the next time I would be able to see him,
he would already be in a casket...

It hurts...
I loved my dad so much....
And I wasn't able to say it to him in his last moments...

It really hurts...

I say that I will be happy...
But I can't deny that I'm really really sad inside...

I miss my dad.