[FIC] Watch Your Back [16/16]
Title: [FIC] Watch Your Back
Pairing: YooSu, YunJae
Genre: angst, fluff, romance
Rating: R
Warning: Character death
Summary: Kim Junsu was an ordinary boy living a life which was far from ordinary. With the death of this parents at young age, he lives by himself, except more than half the time, he isn't alone. He has a stalker that won't let him be and continues to harass Junsu every waking moment. Junsu later discovers its a boy from school and isn't thrilled about the idea of having to be pressured into going out with his stalker, Yoochun. He soon has a change of heart and slowly begins to give in as he forgives Yoochun for scaring him before, but that itself is the least of their problems.
As their feelings for one another intensify, Yoochun finds it harder to keep his secret he has kept hidden for years away from Junsu. His suspicion of Yoochun drives them farther apart, and Yoochun chooses then between life and love. As Junsu's back is turned to him for a mere few seconds, that's when the inevitable happens, but by then, can Junsu undo what has already been done?
Chapter Sixteen
[6 months later]
“Thank you; come again soon” Junsu bowed to the customer as he finished checking out her items and placing them in grocery bags for her to take home.
The girl smiled shyly at him, bowed a little as well, and left the store. Junsu smiled back as he took a paper towel and cleaned his hands with it.
“Hey Su” Yunho and JaeJoong surprised him.
“Oh, hey guys” he waved to them.
“Is you’re shift almost over?”
“Ah …” he glanced at his watch, “in about an hour or so.”
Yunho made a face, “that’s a long time.”
He chuckled, “not really, but you guys can go ahead without me.”
“Are you sure?” JaeJoong asked.
He nodded, “positive."
“Ok, then we’ll see you at dinner tonight.”
“Sure.”
For the rest of the afternoon, Junsu checked out peoples’ items that came in and out of their store and his boss paid him by the end of his shift.
“Good job Junsu” he patted his back contentedly and Junsu smiled shyly, “I’m glad to have hired you as a staff to work here. Keep up the good work boy.”
He bowed, “thank you sir! Thanks you so much for accepting me.”
He grinned at him and then walked back to his office. Junsu had a smile plastered on his face the rest of the afternoon.
He got in the driver’s seat of his car and turned the key in the ignition. He pulled away slowly from the curb and headed straight for Yunho’s house.
It has been six months since Yoochun’s accident and Junsu has almost completely healed from the shock of it. He partially believes that he was born with a serious case of heart disease and that his parents were so ignorant as to leave their son all alone in Japan to go through the surgery by himself. Maybe it’s because he doesn’t want to believe that something was wrong with Yoochun, or that if he does believe, then he’ll think he was to blame for everything that happened because he paid too little attention to Yoochun.
Junsu has been going to therapy continuously for a healing process. Their sessions usually last for about an hour and half, four days a week. You can just say that the whole incident with Yoochun has sort of messed up Junsu’s way of thinking a bit and he needs a little help getting back to normal. Of course, Yunho and JaeJoong have been by his side to help him go on, but they all know one thing: it would take a miracle to help Junsu get over Yoochun’s death.
Maybe if he was still alive and with Junsu, none of this would’ve happened, or maybe if they had never turned the TV on that night and had kept that accident a secret from Junsu, he wouldn’t have suffered so much like Yoochun did. Should-a, would-a, could-a, that’s all anyone can say right now.
All their lives seemed to be going back to normal for the most part, and JaeJoong even helped Junsu to get a job at their local grocery store to keep him distracted during the day. Junsu didn’t start collage yet, and he probably wouldn’t start anytime soon. The stress was already too much to deal with right now, and going to collage would probably only remind him of Yoochun. They had talked a lot about that during their free time together. What was surprising though was Junsu had completely forgotten that today was his and Yoochun’s first anniversary together as a couple. It is sad, truly sad.
As he was walking up the front steps of Yunho’s house, someone from behind tapped him twice and he spun around to be greeted by a young boy around his age.
“I’m sorry to bother you, but are you by any chance Kim Junsu?” he asked with a crooked smile.
“Yes, that’s me. And who are you?” Junsu questioned. He thought he saw this guy from somewhere before and his voice sounded oddly familiar, but he just couldn’t quite remember where.
“Ah, I’m sorry” he bowed, “I’m Shim Changmin. It’s nice to meet you.”
“Hmm, likewise” he shook his hand. “How can I help you?”
“Well, you’re Park Yoochun’s boyfriend, right?”
Junsu had trouble breathing for a minute and shook his head slowly, “was his boyfriend.”
“Was? Are you two fighting again?”
“No … he died in a plane crash earlier this year” he whispered.
“Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t even know” he seemed surprised.
“Yeah well, so am I - wait a minute, how did you know we were fighting before?” he inquired.
“Oh, because remember earlier this year when you thought Yoochun was cheating on you? Well, I’m you’re guy” he stated.
“You …” Junsu suddenly remembered everything. He was the same guy Yoochun was hanging around with at the park and who called his phone when he picked it up the night of their first fight.
“W-Why are you here?”
“I’m sorry if I caused problems between you and you’re boyfriend, but you should know that the reason he was meeting up with me was because he was planning a surprise for today."
“A surprise? For me?”
He nodded, “yup, to celebrate you’re first year anniversary together as a couple. Here” he handed him a light blue envelope and a shiny red rose, “this is for you.”
Junsu took the contents from him and looked at them dumbfounded.
“Well, I need to go. I have other orders to fill. I’m really sorry for you’re loss. Yoochun was a really nice guy” he said as he pushed his bike onto the street and rode away.
Junsu waved back to him and looked down at the envelope he was holding. He sat down on the front door steps and opened the flap with his forefinger. He took out the clean white paper and read the words:
Dear Junsu,
Happy one year anniversary baby! ^^ You don’t know how grateful I am for having someone like you by my side. You might not know it, but I feel pretty damn lucky right about now.
This is just a little something to tell you what waits ahead for the rest of the day. Boy do I have things planned for the both of us! I really can’t wait to do these things with you. But before I do, I just want to say one thing. Thank you Junsu, for accepting me as you’re boyfriend, even though in the beginning I know I wasn’t someone who was to you’re liking, but as I got to know you more, I realized that you were definitely not like other guys at all. Thanks baby, for giving me an opportunity to spend a remarkable twelve months with you. I love you ~~
- Yoochun >.<
Junsu had shed a flood of tears with the words printed on the paper in Yoochun’s handwriting. He traced them with his fingers, all the way down to the words that dance most around the page that said, ‘I love you …’
Inside the envelope as well was another note attached to a silver key.
‘I want you to take this. It’s a spare key to my house. It’s just to say that my door is always opened to you ~’
He drove over to Yoochun’s place and used the key to unlock his front door. He entered in quietly, hearing all the creaking sounds he made that seemed to be echoing in the walls of the house.
He walked in sluggishly and looked around to see if anyone was coming to see what a stranger was doing in their house uninvited. When he figured that no one would come, he quickly made his way over to Yoochun’s room and shut the door behind him. Never did he think he would actually be standing in his dead boyfriend’s room again. To him, being in his house alone felt weird.
He ran his hands along his computer desk, the place where he found those pills of Yoochun’s he wouldn’t let him near. Tears fell from his eyes as he remembered his sincerity of letting him sleep on his bed that night as he slept on the cold, hardwood floor.
‘Why did he have to be so nice to me?’
He opened one of the drawers, and on the very top layed a book labeled ‘My Journal.’ Junsu stared at it for a while before picking it up and opening it. He skimmed through the pages and thought this wasn’t really considered a journal but a series of letters, since he noticed that on the top of every page had begun as, ‘Dear Junsu …’ He opened the book up to the first entry and read:
Dear Junsu,
Today I bought this journal to begin writing what goes on in my life from the heart disease I was born with. Since I began to realize how serious this illness of mine is, I know now that I will die very early, unlike other kids who are able to go around and do whatever they please. But me, I can’t do anything like that at all. I almost feel sorry for myself. One time, I even thought about committing suicide because this was too much to handle myself. To me, the only way to stop other people from getting hurt, is to be hurting yourself, which is exactly why I’m putting myself though all this torture.
If you ever find this book Junsu, then know one thing. I had liked you a lot from the first time I saw you up until I died. Not once have I ever stopped thinking about being with you. I had though in the beginning that if had approached you as the sick boy I am, then you wouldn’t want anything to do with me. I thought the only way I could get you to notice me was to harass you, so I started stalking you. I feel terrible for making you scared and afraid of me because that wasn’t my intention at all. All I wanted was your attention, nothing else. Please believe that …
“Yoochun …” he croaked out as he finished reading the page. He looked down and noticed he had left tear stains on the page and brought the book close to his chest. He wiped his nose and flipped through the book again to something recent.
Dear Junsu,
I had to sneak you out of my house this morning without getting caught by my mom or else I’d be in big trouble, remember? Well, after I returned home from school, my mom found out that I kept you in my room last night and she hit me again. It hurt the first five lashes, but after I started to feel numb I slowly felt nothing afterwords. I bled on my left arm and right leg. After she slapped me many times, she took me to the top of the staircase and pushed me down. When I reached the bottom I felt like my whole world was falling apart. It was hard to see anything at all and I blanked out. I’m pretty sure she continued to hit me even after I was knocked out because I saw more marks on my body tonight when I examined myself before going to sleep.
I don’t know why she abuses me or why she hates me so much, but I feel like if I hadn’t been born as her son, (or hadn’t been born at all), everyone would’ve been much more happier knowing that they don’t have me to deal with or to worry about constantly. I love my mom though, even if she doesn’t feel the same, but I can’t help it because … well, she is my mom after all.
He cried harder this time, both because of the entry and because everything his best friends had told them were true. He couldn’t believe he had doubted them, and now, he had no reason to disbelieve in what they were saying because the truth is all right in front of him. Yoochun had went through so much behind Junsu's back and he never complained once or said anything bad about the kind of life he lived. He really was a good guy, and Junsu regretted never spending more time with him. He clutched the notebook in his hands tightly and began shaking.
“Junsu, what are you doing?”
He turned around and looked at the figure stunned. He came and knelt besides Junsu who was sitting on the bed and picked up the book from his hands.
“I thought I told you not to go through my things when I’m not here.”
“Y-Yoochun?” he whispered, “Y-you’re here …?"
He chuckled, “of course I am.”
They both stood up and Junsu hugged him and buried his face in his chest.
“God Yoochun, you don’t know how worried I was about you. There's so much I need to tell you but the most important thing is that I love -“
When he looked up, Yoochun was gone and he was left embracing the air. He looked around frantically, running around the entire house looking for him, repeatedly crying out his name over and over again.
“Yoochun … Yoochun … Yoochun!” his screams became a helpless plea for help.
After numerous attempts of trying to find him, Junsu collapsed on all fours and sobbed uncontrollably.
He had broken down all over again, a process that would take a lot longer to cure than when he first started out six months ago …
THE END!
---
If tears could build a stairway
and memories a lane
I’d walk right up to heaven
and bring you home again
no farewell words were spoken
no time to say goodbye
you were gone before I knew it
and only god knows why
my heart still aches with sadness
and secret tears still flow
what it meant to love you
no one will ever know
but now I know you want me
to mourn for you no more
but, remember all the happy times
life still has much in store
and since you'll never be forgotten
I pledge to you today
a hollowed place within my heart
is where you'll always stay
---
A/N: I know it’s New Years and all and everyone is suppose to be all happy and what not, but I’ll make an exception and post the last chapter up today.
Thanks to all my wonderful readers who have been reading until the end!! ♥
Pairing: YooSu, YunJae
Genre: angst, fluff, romance
Rating: R
Warning: Character death
Summary: Kim Junsu was an ordinary boy living a life which was far from ordinary. With the death of this parents at young age, he lives by himself, except more than half the time, he isn't alone. He has a stalker that won't let him be and continues to harass Junsu every waking moment. Junsu later discovers its a boy from school and isn't thrilled about the idea of having to be pressured into going out with his stalker, Yoochun. He soon has a change of heart and slowly begins to give in as he forgives Yoochun for scaring him before, but that itself is the least of their problems.
As their feelings for one another intensify, Yoochun finds it harder to keep his secret he has kept hidden for years away from Junsu. His suspicion of Yoochun drives them farther apart, and Yoochun chooses then between life and love. As Junsu's back is turned to him for a mere few seconds, that's when the inevitable happens, but by then, can Junsu undo what has already been done?
Chapter Sixteen
[6 months later]
“Thank you; come again soon” Junsu bowed to the customer as he finished checking out her items and placing them in grocery bags for her to take home.
The girl smiled shyly at him, bowed a little as well, and left the store. Junsu smiled back as he took a paper towel and cleaned his hands with it.
“Hey Su” Yunho and JaeJoong surprised him.
“Oh, hey guys” he waved to them.
“Is you’re shift almost over?”
“Ah …” he glanced at his watch, “in about an hour or so.”
Yunho made a face, “that’s a long time.”
He chuckled, “not really, but you guys can go ahead without me.”
“Are you sure?” JaeJoong asked.
He nodded, “positive."
“Ok, then we’ll see you at dinner tonight.”
“Sure.”
For the rest of the afternoon, Junsu checked out peoples’ items that came in and out of their store and his boss paid him by the end of his shift.
“Good job Junsu” he patted his back contentedly and Junsu smiled shyly, “I’m glad to have hired you as a staff to work here. Keep up the good work boy.”
He bowed, “thank you sir! Thanks you so much for accepting me.”
He grinned at him and then walked back to his office. Junsu had a smile plastered on his face the rest of the afternoon.
He got in the driver’s seat of his car and turned the key in the ignition. He pulled away slowly from the curb and headed straight for Yunho’s house.
It has been six months since Yoochun’s accident and Junsu has almost completely healed from the shock of it. He partially believes that he was born with a serious case of heart disease and that his parents were so ignorant as to leave their son all alone in Japan to go through the surgery by himself. Maybe it’s because he doesn’t want to believe that something was wrong with Yoochun, or that if he does believe, then he’ll think he was to blame for everything that happened because he paid too little attention to Yoochun.
Junsu has been going to therapy continuously for a healing process. Their sessions usually last for about an hour and half, four days a week. You can just say that the whole incident with Yoochun has sort of messed up Junsu’s way of thinking a bit and he needs a little help getting back to normal. Of course, Yunho and JaeJoong have been by his side to help him go on, but they all know one thing: it would take a miracle to help Junsu get over Yoochun’s death.
Maybe if he was still alive and with Junsu, none of this would’ve happened, or maybe if they had never turned the TV on that night and had kept that accident a secret from Junsu, he wouldn’t have suffered so much like Yoochun did. Should-a, would-a, could-a, that’s all anyone can say right now.
All their lives seemed to be going back to normal for the most part, and JaeJoong even helped Junsu to get a job at their local grocery store to keep him distracted during the day. Junsu didn’t start collage yet, and he probably wouldn’t start anytime soon. The stress was already too much to deal with right now, and going to collage would probably only remind him of Yoochun. They had talked a lot about that during their free time together. What was surprising though was Junsu had completely forgotten that today was his and Yoochun’s first anniversary together as a couple. It is sad, truly sad.
As he was walking up the front steps of Yunho’s house, someone from behind tapped him twice and he spun around to be greeted by a young boy around his age.
“I’m sorry to bother you, but are you by any chance Kim Junsu?” he asked with a crooked smile.
“Yes, that’s me. And who are you?” Junsu questioned. He thought he saw this guy from somewhere before and his voice sounded oddly familiar, but he just couldn’t quite remember where.
“Ah, I’m sorry” he bowed, “I’m Shim Changmin. It’s nice to meet you.”
“Hmm, likewise” he shook his hand. “How can I help you?”
“Well, you’re Park Yoochun’s boyfriend, right?”
Junsu had trouble breathing for a minute and shook his head slowly, “was his boyfriend.”
“Was? Are you two fighting again?”
“No … he died in a plane crash earlier this year” he whispered.
“Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t even know” he seemed surprised.
“Yeah well, so am I - wait a minute, how did you know we were fighting before?” he inquired.
“Oh, because remember earlier this year when you thought Yoochun was cheating on you? Well, I’m you’re guy” he stated.
“You …” Junsu suddenly remembered everything. He was the same guy Yoochun was hanging around with at the park and who called his phone when he picked it up the night of their first fight.
“W-Why are you here?”
“I’m sorry if I caused problems between you and you’re boyfriend, but you should know that the reason he was meeting up with me was because he was planning a surprise for today."
“A surprise? For me?”
He nodded, “yup, to celebrate you’re first year anniversary together as a couple. Here” he handed him a light blue envelope and a shiny red rose, “this is for you.”
Junsu took the contents from him and looked at them dumbfounded.
“Well, I need to go. I have other orders to fill. I’m really sorry for you’re loss. Yoochun was a really nice guy” he said as he pushed his bike onto the street and rode away.
Junsu waved back to him and looked down at the envelope he was holding. He sat down on the front door steps and opened the flap with his forefinger. He took out the clean white paper and read the words:
Dear Junsu,
Happy one year anniversary baby! ^^ You don’t know how grateful I am for having someone like you by my side. You might not know it, but I feel pretty damn lucky right about now.
This is just a little something to tell you what waits ahead for the rest of the day. Boy do I have things planned for the both of us! I really can’t wait to do these things with you. But before I do, I just want to say one thing. Thank you Junsu, for accepting me as you’re boyfriend, even though in the beginning I know I wasn’t someone who was to you’re liking, but as I got to know you more, I realized that you were definitely not like other guys at all. Thanks baby, for giving me an opportunity to spend a remarkable twelve months with you. I love you ~~
- Yoochun >.<
Junsu had shed a flood of tears with the words printed on the paper in Yoochun’s handwriting. He traced them with his fingers, all the way down to the words that dance most around the page that said, ‘I love you …’
Inside the envelope as well was another note attached to a silver key.
‘I want you to take this. It’s a spare key to my house. It’s just to say that my door is always opened to you ~’
He drove over to Yoochun’s place and used the key to unlock his front door. He entered in quietly, hearing all the creaking sounds he made that seemed to be echoing in the walls of the house.
He walked in sluggishly and looked around to see if anyone was coming to see what a stranger was doing in their house uninvited. When he figured that no one would come, he quickly made his way over to Yoochun’s room and shut the door behind him. Never did he think he would actually be standing in his dead boyfriend’s room again. To him, being in his house alone felt weird.
He ran his hands along his computer desk, the place where he found those pills of Yoochun’s he wouldn’t let him near. Tears fell from his eyes as he remembered his sincerity of letting him sleep on his bed that night as he slept on the cold, hardwood floor.
‘Why did he have to be so nice to me?’
He opened one of the drawers, and on the very top layed a book labeled ‘My Journal.’ Junsu stared at it for a while before picking it up and opening it. He skimmed through the pages and thought this wasn’t really considered a journal but a series of letters, since he noticed that on the top of every page had begun as, ‘Dear Junsu …’ He opened the book up to the first entry and read:
Dear Junsu,
Today I bought this journal to begin writing what goes on in my life from the heart disease I was born with. Since I began to realize how serious this illness of mine is, I know now that I will die very early, unlike other kids who are able to go around and do whatever they please. But me, I can’t do anything like that at all. I almost feel sorry for myself. One time, I even thought about committing suicide because this was too much to handle myself. To me, the only way to stop other people from getting hurt, is to be hurting yourself, which is exactly why I’m putting myself though all this torture.
If you ever find this book Junsu, then know one thing. I had liked you a lot from the first time I saw you up until I died. Not once have I ever stopped thinking about being with you. I had though in the beginning that if had approached you as the sick boy I am, then you wouldn’t want anything to do with me. I thought the only way I could get you to notice me was to harass you, so I started stalking you. I feel terrible for making you scared and afraid of me because that wasn’t my intention at all. All I wanted was your attention, nothing else. Please believe that …
“Yoochun …” he croaked out as he finished reading the page. He looked down and noticed he had left tear stains on the page and brought the book close to his chest. He wiped his nose and flipped through the book again to something recent.
Dear Junsu,
I had to sneak you out of my house this morning without getting caught by my mom or else I’d be in big trouble, remember? Well, after I returned home from school, my mom found out that I kept you in my room last night and she hit me again. It hurt the first five lashes, but after I started to feel numb I slowly felt nothing afterwords. I bled on my left arm and right leg. After she slapped me many times, she took me to the top of the staircase and pushed me down. When I reached the bottom I felt like my whole world was falling apart. It was hard to see anything at all and I blanked out. I’m pretty sure she continued to hit me even after I was knocked out because I saw more marks on my body tonight when I examined myself before going to sleep.
I don’t know why she abuses me or why she hates me so much, but I feel like if I hadn’t been born as her son, (or hadn’t been born at all), everyone would’ve been much more happier knowing that they don’t have me to deal with or to worry about constantly. I love my mom though, even if she doesn’t feel the same, but I can’t help it because … well, she is my mom after all.
He cried harder this time, both because of the entry and because everything his best friends had told them were true. He couldn’t believe he had doubted them, and now, he had no reason to disbelieve in what they were saying because the truth is all right in front of him. Yoochun had went through so much behind Junsu's back and he never complained once or said anything bad about the kind of life he lived. He really was a good guy, and Junsu regretted never spending more time with him. He clutched the notebook in his hands tightly and began shaking.
“Junsu, what are you doing?”
He turned around and looked at the figure stunned. He came and knelt besides Junsu who was sitting on the bed and picked up the book from his hands.
“I thought I told you not to go through my things when I’m not here.”
“Y-Yoochun?” he whispered, “Y-you’re here …?"
He chuckled, “of course I am.”
They both stood up and Junsu hugged him and buried his face in his chest.
“God Yoochun, you don’t know how worried I was about you. There's so much I need to tell you but the most important thing is that I love -“
When he looked up, Yoochun was gone and he was left embracing the air. He looked around frantically, running around the entire house looking for him, repeatedly crying out his name over and over again.
“Yoochun … Yoochun … Yoochun!” his screams became a helpless plea for help.
After numerous attempts of trying to find him, Junsu collapsed on all fours and sobbed uncontrollably.
He had broken down all over again, a process that would take a lot longer to cure than when he first started out six months ago …
THE END!
---
If tears could build a stairway
and memories a lane
I’d walk right up to heaven
and bring you home again
no farewell words were spoken
no time to say goodbye
you were gone before I knew it
and only god knows why
my heart still aches with sadness
and secret tears still flow
what it meant to love you
no one will ever know
but now I know you want me
to mourn for you no more
but, remember all the happy times
life still has much in store
and since you'll never be forgotten
I pledge to you today
a hollowed place within my heart
is where you'll always stay
---
A/N: I know it’s New Years and all and everyone is suppose to be all happy and what not, but I’ll make an exception and post the last chapter up today.
Thanks to all my wonderful readers who have been reading until the end!! ♥