...fucking...christ.
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...I so did not mean to do that.
Yeah, so last night was interesting, and the night prior to that. I'll talk about 2 nights ago. Briefly. Got into fight, left my house...met some new people, some kid, Rob picked me up, met Casie, met Serg, was all good. was in for some lesbo sex0rz..but the girl, Casie was sort of ...shy and stuff. I didn't care though. She seems to like me, but when she hung out with me was drunk, which makes me a tad bit skeptical on the whole situation...but she's really cool, so it's all good. Always good to make new friends.
But yeah, I get home at around 3 am, fuck school. I have to find an opening in my house, so I break in through a window. Mother catches me half way through. 2 hour discussion about how when I was younger she always worked and I started defying them when they fucking took me for 6 hour drives every weekend to antique shows and fucking sailboats. I got carsick and shit..AND BORED. After 2 years of doing that every fucking week, you'd get sick of it..so yeah, that's how I became a defiant little prick, prior to that, I was always the good perfect little boy...
yeah, so it's 5 am, we're talking. I tell her I grew independent, I didn't need her by the time she had time for me..and that was it. I slept all day, fucking night comes..BORING. I think all day, I miss my ex, she doesn't even speak to me anymore, so I guess she hates me. it's funny though. She calls me all these sweet names, says she still loves me on christmas day, and always said I was so fucking adorable, then new years comes. I get drunk, and she gets all pissy with me, boom. Hasn't spoken to me since. Kind of hypocritical, since i'm sure she drank on new years...and I think I know why she hates me, it's because I was drinking :D. I made her a promise that I wouldn't drink, or drive or any other shit. But I lie..er..break promises too often, and now she doesn't speak to me anymore, so I guess it doesn't fucking matter anyways. She likes some other guy now *shrugs* Best thing I can do is just try and get over her, as much as I don't want to because I still love her, but I know no matter what I do, nothing will fix us..
Annyways, onwards to last night. I instant message my best buddy in the whole wide world, Chris. Tells me he's been downing 151 bacardi and that he's going to kill himself. Too many people screwed him over and blah blah. I tell him i'm coming to get him. Fuck that, I don't need this shit. My life sucks as it is..my best friend is going to kill himself now? No thanks pls. So I steal my fathers BMW at 4 in the morning back out in the pouring rain with no lights (i'm good) and drive away.. so I hit the highway, and I go 90 up north to riverhead to get him. Fucking nervous too 'cause i'm passing the jail. I get there, tell him to get ready..he insists on driving back, he's a better driver than I am anyways. So he's having fun on the way back, doing a hundred and fucking twenty down the highway. scared the fuck out of me. We get back, park exactly where it was, sneak back in and just chill..since it was like 5:30 once we got back. I'm fucking tired...7 rolls by, i'm about to pass out. My mother wakes up, like..go to school. She doesn't know how chris got here, so we said he came..and I get all of this shit, and it turns into a fight. She takes chris home later on, and I pass out till about 4:30. I do a good fucking deed, since he said it himself. if I didn't come to get him by pulling a stupid stunt like that, he would have killed himself..
I don't know. I just want to fix my life, make it go back to what it was. I want to fucking be in school, I want Heather back, I want my parents to fucking love me again, and I want all of my fucking old friends..-_-...I don't want any of this bullshit anymore x.x