(no subject)
Here are a few things that you don't care about but I want to tell you anyway. I have hidden these things behind several lj-cuts for several reasons:
a. all together these things make a long entry
b. you shouldn't have to read about things that you don't care about
c. it makes a more organized entry; and
d. I feel like it...?
I was spoiled as a young child immensely. This now greatly affects current things in my life. What I mean by this is as a child my parents divorced. They were constantly trying to win the hearts of my sister's and I because neither parent wanted to be loved any less, and neither parent wanted to lose a battle they inflicted upon themselves, which was where the children wanted to stay. We started off staying only with my dad, then only with my dad on the weekends, and then only with my dad whenever we wanted. My mother would constantly tell horror stories of my father, and my father did the same. Through all of this, my parents were extremely afraid that I would develope some kind of "middle child syndrome". To ensure that this didn't happen, they both did little things that neither of my sisters would notice. Things like letting me help make dinner, and reading me two books at night instead of one. Before the divorce even happened I became aware of this. I'm getting off topic. That's a story for another day. I have been writing to tell you about my dad. After the divorce, on the weekends, my dad hated cooking. He told my sisters and I that it was actually cheaper to eat out than cook at home, between the cost of the ingredients, the water, the electricity, it was just cheaper. We believed him, and every meal - we ate out, for years. I don't know what he ate through the week, and I don't think I ever will. I know now that this is not an accurate statment (eating out every meal), and I think he does too. It's funny now though, because I love eating out, and I want to do it every chance I can. I was thinking about this at Ruby Tuesday's tonight.
Tonight I also thought a lot about the concert/show thing that I talked about yesterday. I decided that this must happen because this person is afraid that they might get really mad at me and not want to go with me anymore. This makes logical sense to me, but upsets me at the same time, if it is the case. I hope I am not right about this.
I started reading A Clockwork Orange. You probably know this if you have read the book and if you pay any attention to my away messages. Let me tell you some things that I know about the book that you may like to know also. If not, you are allowed to skip to the next paragraph. A Clockwork Orange was written by Anthony Burgess in the 1960's in England. The novel included 3 parts, and 7 chapters in each. The total of 21 chapters symbolized the age of freedom and growing up, when you could vote, drink, and basically assume adult responsibility. Burgess brought the novel to America to be published as well. His American publisher decided not to include the last chapter in the novel, and until 1986, people of America never read it. Burgess couldn't understand why the publisher wouldn't want to include his dénouement (the twenty-first chapter) in the publication, but he needed the money so decided to have it published anyway. Kubrick's film follows the American version. 'I was cured all right' says Alex, and so the American book ends. So the film ends too. The twenty-first chapter is founded on the principal the human beings change. The American publisher told Burgess that American's were tougher and could face up to the reality of the novel, unlike the British. The publisher told Burgess that American's wanted to read a novel with no shred of optimism in it (a Nixonian book, if you will), they wanted evil prancing on the page, up and down, and to the very last line. But that isn't want Burgess wanted. Burgess did not think that leaving the last chapter out was a fair picture of human life, because, by definition, a human being is endowed with free will. He can use this to choose between good and evil. If he can only perform good, or only perform evil, then he is a clockwork orange -meaning that he has the appearance of an organism lovely with color and juice but is in fact only a clockwork toy to be wound up by God or the Devil (or since this is increasingly replacing both) the Almighty State. It is inhuman to be totally good as it is to be totally evil. Burgess likes to say that without the last chapter the book is just a fable. It is now printed with all chapters everywhere books are sold! Also, Burgess doesn't like this novel, in the same way that Rachmaninoff doesn't like Prelude in C Sharp Minor (because he wrote it as a boy and is known mainly for it, and the works of his maturity never got any acclaim).
I have only read up to chapter 2 of part one, so I don't have much to say about that. This is why I am filling you with random facts about Anthony Burgess and his publisher and the novel.
For just once in my life, even just for one day, I would like everything with everyone to be good. I would like to talk on the phone and not get hung up on or yelled at. I would like to be able to tell people anything and them not say I am being annoying. I would like to be able to hang out and everything just be okay. I think this would be a nice beginning of May gift.
We can destroy what we have written but we cannot unwrite it. I leave what I wrote with what Dr. Johnson called frigid indifference to the judgement of that .00000001 of the American population which cares about such things. Eat this sweetish segment or spit it out. You are free.
a. all together these things make a long entry
b. you shouldn't have to read about things that you don't care about
c. it makes a more organized entry; and
d. I feel like it...?
I was spoiled as a young child immensely. This now greatly affects current things in my life. What I mean by this is as a child my parents divorced. They were constantly trying to win the hearts of my sister's and I because neither parent wanted to be loved any less, and neither parent wanted to lose a battle they inflicted upon themselves, which was where the children wanted to stay. We started off staying only with my dad, then only with my dad on the weekends, and then only with my dad whenever we wanted. My mother would constantly tell horror stories of my father, and my father did the same. Through all of this, my parents were extremely afraid that I would develope some kind of "middle child syndrome". To ensure that this didn't happen, they both did little things that neither of my sisters would notice. Things like letting me help make dinner, and reading me two books at night instead of one. Before the divorce even happened I became aware of this. I'm getting off topic. That's a story for another day. I have been writing to tell you about my dad. After the divorce, on the weekends, my dad hated cooking. He told my sisters and I that it was actually cheaper to eat out than cook at home, between the cost of the ingredients, the water, the electricity, it was just cheaper. We believed him, and every meal - we ate out, for years. I don't know what he ate through the week, and I don't think I ever will. I know now that this is not an accurate statment (eating out every meal), and I think he does too. It's funny now though, because I love eating out, and I want to do it every chance I can. I was thinking about this at Ruby Tuesday's tonight.
Tonight I also thought a lot about the concert/show thing that I talked about yesterday. I decided that this must happen because this person is afraid that they might get really mad at me and not want to go with me anymore. This makes logical sense to me, but upsets me at the same time, if it is the case. I hope I am not right about this.
I started reading A Clockwork Orange. You probably know this if you have read the book and if you pay any attention to my away messages. Let me tell you some things that I know about the book that you may like to know also. If not, you are allowed to skip to the next paragraph. A Clockwork Orange was written by Anthony Burgess in the 1960's in England. The novel included 3 parts, and 7 chapters in each. The total of 21 chapters symbolized the age of freedom and growing up, when you could vote, drink, and basically assume adult responsibility. Burgess brought the novel to America to be published as well. His American publisher decided not to include the last chapter in the novel, and until 1986, people of America never read it. Burgess couldn't understand why the publisher wouldn't want to include his dénouement (the twenty-first chapter) in the publication, but he needed the money so decided to have it published anyway. Kubrick's film follows the American version. 'I was cured all right' says Alex, and so the American book ends. So the film ends too. The twenty-first chapter is founded on the principal the human beings change. The American publisher told Burgess that American's were tougher and could face up to the reality of the novel, unlike the British. The publisher told Burgess that American's wanted to read a novel with no shred of optimism in it (a Nixonian book, if you will), they wanted evil prancing on the page, up and down, and to the very last line. But that isn't want Burgess wanted. Burgess did not think that leaving the last chapter out was a fair picture of human life, because, by definition, a human being is endowed with free will. He can use this to choose between good and evil. If he can only perform good, or only perform evil, then he is a clockwork orange -meaning that he has the appearance of an organism lovely with color and juice but is in fact only a clockwork toy to be wound up by God or the Devil (or since this is increasingly replacing both) the Almighty State. It is inhuman to be totally good as it is to be totally evil. Burgess likes to say that without the last chapter the book is just a fable. It is now printed with all chapters everywhere books are sold! Also, Burgess doesn't like this novel, in the same way that Rachmaninoff doesn't like Prelude in C Sharp Minor (because he wrote it as a boy and is known mainly for it, and the works of his maturity never got any acclaim).
I have only read up to chapter 2 of part one, so I don't have much to say about that. This is why I am filling you with random facts about Anthony Burgess and his publisher and the novel.
For just once in my life, even just for one day, I would like everything with everyone to be good. I would like to talk on the phone and not get hung up on or yelled at. I would like to be able to tell people anything and them not say I am being annoying. I would like to be able to hang out and everything just be okay. I think this would be a nice beginning of May gift.
We can destroy what we have written but we cannot unwrite it. I leave what I wrote with what Dr. Johnson called frigid indifference to the judgement of that .00000001 of the American population which cares about such things. Eat this sweetish segment or spit it out. You are free.