Sometimes
Sometimes I think I would love to wake up one morning, any morning, it doesn't matter, and just have everything in my life restored to the "normal" level. If my friendships, my relationships, if they all made sense. If I knew why some people did the things they do. If I understood the things people said to me. If I could understand how different some people are. If I could make sense of the way people treat other people. If I could ever understand what a promise really is.
Sometimes this kind of stuff is funny to me in that way that it just amazes me. Other times, it is not. I guess it just amazes me that some people can say something and seem so sincere in saying it. And they can use that "promise" word. I guess we should all know by now though that promises are only words unless they are fulfilled. I guess it just seems strange to me the things people say when they are at their most vulnerable stages, when they are trying to get a piece of their life back. I guess it just seems that people will say anything just to insure that the missing piece of their life will be there when they wake the next day. It doesn't seem to matter much what they're saying, or who they're saying it to. But with whatever they are saying, they expect you to say something too, whether you'll stop doing something, or you'll start doing something, it doesn't matter. But you are always expected to be true to your promise. And for the most part, you will be. Because you want everyone in the world to know that you care, and unless someone is willing to do something to put ease at a reoccuring fight, then they don't care. And as much as they want you to believe that they do, they don't, and sometimes you have to be the bigger person and admit to yourself that they don't and they won't, as simple as it seems.
Sometimes this is the kind of thing that confuses me. And sometimes this is the only kind of thing that ever makes any amount of sense. But sometimes, you have to retract what you think, because sometimes, people just have bad days, and sometimes people just don't want to talk, and sometimes people are just in bad moods. Maybe sometimes people need to just hold on, and slow down long enough to think "sometimes people really do mean it when they say that nothing is wrong". But I guess sometimes it wouldn't seem so bad to get a phonecall when you don't expect it, and sometimes maybe apologies are in order. But sometimes that kind of thing never happens, and the only thing that does is the confusion of life in general, when you know what you want, when you know what you have to do, when you know what's right, when your head and your heart don't agree. Sometimes I think I would love to wake up one morning, any morning, it doesn't matter, and just have everything in my life restored to the "normal" level.
Sometimes this kind of stuff is funny to me in that way that it just amazes me. Other times, it is not. I guess it just amazes me that some people can say something and seem so sincere in saying it. And they can use that "promise" word. I guess we should all know by now though that promises are only words unless they are fulfilled. I guess it just seems strange to me the things people say when they are at their most vulnerable stages, when they are trying to get a piece of their life back. I guess it just seems that people will say anything just to insure that the missing piece of their life will be there when they wake the next day. It doesn't seem to matter much what they're saying, or who they're saying it to. But with whatever they are saying, they expect you to say something too, whether you'll stop doing something, or you'll start doing something, it doesn't matter. But you are always expected to be true to your promise. And for the most part, you will be. Because you want everyone in the world to know that you care, and unless someone is willing to do something to put ease at a reoccuring fight, then they don't care. And as much as they want you to believe that they do, they don't, and sometimes you have to be the bigger person and admit to yourself that they don't and they won't, as simple as it seems.
Sometimes this is the kind of thing that confuses me. And sometimes this is the only kind of thing that ever makes any amount of sense. But sometimes, you have to retract what you think, because sometimes, people just have bad days, and sometimes people just don't want to talk, and sometimes people are just in bad moods. Maybe sometimes people need to just hold on, and slow down long enough to think "sometimes people really do mean it when they say that nothing is wrong". But I guess sometimes it wouldn't seem so bad to get a phonecall when you don't expect it, and sometimes maybe apologies are in order. But sometimes that kind of thing never happens, and the only thing that does is the confusion of life in general, when you know what you want, when you know what you have to do, when you know what's right, when your head and your heart don't agree. Sometimes I think I would love to wake up one morning, any morning, it doesn't matter, and just have everything in my life restored to the "normal" level.