I remembered to look up my TOEFL scores online (I'll get official scores mailed to me later). I got the full score, 120. Alright... :D
I wonder what happens if I get the Fulbright scholarship, but then don't get accepted into any school? I guess they'll just search for other suitable colleges? (Since it's the Institute of International Education or something that places you in cooperation with Fulbright; you don't get to choose a school.)
I mean, what ARE the odds that out of hundreds of applicants, I'll be one of the 10 that are admitted?! I'm not that brilliant, I have not published anything, I have no academic background in writing or literature.
I'm re-thinking everything once again, because the schools I thought I might choose don't apparently have very good funding programs (not to mention the housing issue I was thinking about earlier), and I'm going to need money for my second year. The schools that I like that seem to have good financial aid options are schools that are super selective - places like University of Michigan, or University of California at Irvine, or Arizona State University.
Sigh. So what if I pick one great university that's selective and well-funded, one slightly less selective and less expensive place (SFSU?), and... fuck, I've no idea. Something ludicrous, like Louisiana State University.
At this point, I'm tempted to just write down three top priorities based on how I like them regardless of money issues (as long as they're not waaay too expensive) and regardless of selectivity, let Fulbright handle the rest. When I talked to the Fulbright office lady, she recommended to include one well-known university, one that's not as expensive...
I need to finally fucking CHOOSE and be done with it.
Oh and I got a new haircut today.