Klatuu Barada Nut-punch
I predicted that "The Day the Earth Stood Still" wouldn't be any good, but does anyone listen to me? No. The original was forgettable at best AND Keanu Reeves is in it, enough said.
There are some bright spots, however:
- Keanu plays Neo pretty well, this time without all the ridiculous add-ons like dialog and feeling.
- John Cleese for the 30 seconds he's in it.
- GORT showing that he had freed his hands from the army's bonds with child-like impudence.
- MQ-9 Reaper. WANT.
- Robert Knepper even creepier than on Prison Break.
My suggestions for improvement:
- David Bowie as the Goblin King
- Pair Tommy Lee Jones with Will Smith's kid instead of Jennifer Connelly and re-badge as Men In Black III
- Bring in some Rock'em-Sock'em robots to fight GORT
That said, is TDTESS awful? Not really. Good? Not even close. It's tolerable if you don't have a half dozen tweens running back and forth across the back row of the theater for 20 minutes until someone calls in the only slightly older usher.
In my rating scale of how much I would actually pay to see the film vs ticket face value: I give this 3.50 out of 10.50. I may call it 4.50 if only for the preview for Star Trek.
There are some bright spots, however:
- Keanu plays Neo pretty well, this time without all the ridiculous add-ons like dialog and feeling.
- John Cleese for the 30 seconds he's in it.
- GORT showing that he had freed his hands from the army's bonds with child-like impudence.
- MQ-9 Reaper. WANT.
- Robert Knepper even creepier than on Prison Break.
My suggestions for improvement:
- David Bowie as the Goblin King
- Pair Tommy Lee Jones with Will Smith's kid instead of Jennifer Connelly and re-badge as Men In Black III
- Bring in some Rock'em-Sock'em robots to fight GORT
That said, is TDTESS awful? Not really. Good? Not even close. It's tolerable if you don't have a half dozen tweens running back and forth across the back row of the theater for 20 minutes until someone calls in the only slightly older usher.
In my rating scale of how much I would actually pay to see the film vs ticket face value: I give this 3.50 out of 10.50. I may call it 4.50 if only for the preview for Star Trek.