*Behavioural Changes.
People have come up to me saying, "Ashli, why you so quiet", "Ashli why you look mad?", "Ashli whats wrong?" To answer your monotanous[sp] questions, NOTHING is wrong you people are just really annoying and really childish. I have it pretty much figured out..It IS what Ron said a while back when he was in Truman High. People who dont understand you completely will shy away from you because you are different. Basically because you're not the norm. Its not necessarily YOU, it could just the people who see the world in a closed little box. Never outside mommy, and daddy's range of comfort. Nothing to worry about, nothing to pay for. You dont focus too much on the new kicks thats out or the new fads that will eventually die out and replenish itself in the future. You're focused on your music, and whats going to get you to tomorrow.
Moreorless, what I'm saying is fuck the friends. Ive realized there are a certain amount of people that I wouldnt mind spending time with, outside family...
Stephany
Matty
Keith
Conroy
Ak
Chrissy
Amir
all others. Ive probably told you since day ONE that i dont give a fuck about you, and once I'm done with school I'm bouncing. Catch the attitude, talk shit, do what YOU have to do, with the nothingness that you do, just for the spur of the moment and reputation. I'm good. Friendship doesnt mean that much to me, its sincerity, reliability, and trust. You could be as genuine as you want but that doesnt mean when shit hit the fan, you're gonna be there for me. I gave myself to you, if you dont feel so, it probably wasnt so. EVERYONE knows that i dont hide my feelings. They often show on my face. I dont kiss ass, and I refuse to kiss anyone's ass if they're not benefitting me in anyway. That is my promise to you and to myself, for eternity.
Know that I can be a bitch when i want to be, but for every bitchy comment i make, understand why. Understand why you are in that position. My bitchiness is just your label for the reality that I say or show. There is some thing called "tough love" and if its constantly with you, i dont like you. Period. Its 2007, i think this time is for me now. I'm tired of being nice. I'm tired of the bullshit. I will not say excuse me just to make sure your feelings arent hurt. Fuck that.
If you're feeling any kind of way by reading this, follow through on the feeling and approach me. More than likely I AM talking about you.
Be about it. Dont speak about it.