Jul 17, 2006 13:57
because fsu is such a possibility, i recently sat down to really figure out my finances.
my findings indicate that i'm indeed screwed. $8,400. in credit card debt alone.
this astronomical number has led me to a bit of self-exploration.
i've realized that i hold back in every area of my life except when it comes to spending.
philosophically, i'm a free-spirit while in reality; i'm literally scared of everything. i live within the boundaries of my square. i won't stay out too late. i won't drink too much. i won't give up the re-v card. and i won't let any body in.
to protect myself from a pain once felt (still felt?); i've locked up the free bird within us all.
to outlet, i'm emotional, i'm bitter, and i spend. i spend and all of the time i neglect to notice that there isn't any money there to spend to being with. i buy stuff. stuff that fills a void momentarily only to be filled again once realized... it's still empty.
so for the past week i've actively begun the bank account healing process. buying only within my means and understanding the difference between a need and a want. and oddly enough, it seems to be working.
the lesson learned: the mind forgets to want when the basic needs of life are being met.